Exceptional Reflection Self-Defeatist by Tara Maxfield

I wanted to catch a shooting star, And ensure it would be all mine. But the distance was just too far, And I would’ve gotten lost in time.   I wanted to rope a wild horse, And cloister it in my stable. But it was too arduous a course, And I just wasn't sure I was able.   I wanted to be a regal queen, And wear a crown upon my head. But it was a fretful, worrisome thing, And I was overwhelmed and filled with dread.   I wanted to run with the wolf pack, And join them to howl at the moon. But I would just hold them back, And that would ensure their doom.   I wanted to soar like an eagle, And below me see a world so small. But none of them could I equal, And from the sky I would just fall.   I wanted to be anything great, Anything besides being authentically me. And in my attempts to live my life as a fake, I regretably silenced the she that was me.                     Author Notes This poem, while dark and brooding, was my way of processing some emotions and regrets from my younger years. I feel like because I spent so much time trying to be who I thought others wanted me to be that I missed out on some opportunities and paths that I would've benefited from. I eventually did decide to just be myself which improved my life dramatically before it was too late. My poetry is typically dark and brooding. I just don't do rainbows and unicorns very much. But there's no cause for concern. I'm just working things out. My love to my readers! I hope you find my writing relatable in some way and that you can see my truths. Tara

© Copyright 2024. Tara Maxfield All rights reserved. Tara Maxfield has granted FanStory.com, its affiliates and its syndicates non-exclusive rights to display this work.