Reviews from

The Piper

Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "The Piper, part 12"
Young Adult Fantasy

16 total reviews 
Comment from karenina
Excellent
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Phew! So glad both are alive! Seems Rupert is fortunate indeed to have less than mortal wounds. Once again I am lulled into thinking this Fae you've manifested has a certain kindness to him that belies the legends.

(Oh, woe is me if I'm wrong!)

I love the idea that music will calm Piper and lull the animals... I can imagine me saying this very thing to my grandson as I close this chapter and tuck him in.

My one question was:

"If all three of us travel together it would take about a week."

"A week?" Worry crept into Piper's voice and pleading into his eyes. "Can he make it that long?"

Redd-Leif remained silent for a moment while he studied Piper. "I doubt it. But with luck, and if the weather holds, I could make it in three or four hours if I carry him."

A WEEK pared down to three of four hours? That IS magical!

Alas, I have to leave to pick up my granddaughter from work!
I'd much rather stay and gobble up another chapter or three!

Karenina

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2023
    Hi Karenina,
    It is nice to hear that you are caught up in the characters and wondering what will happen to them.
    I hope all is well with you and yours.
    Thank you for taking time to read and review these chapters. I was gone for the weekend and coming back to ninve reviews was a delightful surprise.
    Debi
reply by karenina on 20-Feb-2023
    Oh my! Sorry I deluged you!
Comment from May 1
Excellent
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I love the descriptions. I do hope he gets to keep both of his hands. Piper is so brave for agreeing to stay all alone so quickly. Hm, it does make sense that music holds a lot of power. Hm, that's so interesting, the crumbles of knowledge he gets help us as readers understand better as well.

 Comment Written 30-Jan-2020


reply by the author on 30-Jan-2020
    Hi May 1,
    Thank you for mentioning the descriptions. I love your comments. Again, thank you for going back and reading from the first. I've gone back and read a handful of stories from the beginning on the site that truly interested me, but you're the first to do it to my story. I am so flattered.
    Debi
reply by May 1 on 30-Jan-2020
    You're welcome. Your story deserves it, it's amazing. I just wish I had more time to read on but I guess I'll savor it instead.
Comment from sunnilicious
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good introduction to previous installments. Good author notes or character list. Good narrative storytelling and dialogue. The story didn't spark my interests, however, it is nice and the story flowed nicely. Good work.

 Comment Written 19-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
    Thank you for stopping us in to read and review, especially in the middle of the story. I appreciate the kind comments.
Comment from LaRosa
Excellent
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this is going to be a very interesting book.
The writer had a good sense of how to use tension/relief elements, and holds this reader's interest and curiosity.
It's interesting the concept that certain 'tunes have deeper magic'. Guess it's not really anything new...music IS magic!

And I truly believe that any true musician can use his art to manipulate emotions to his advantage

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the encouraging comments. I am pleased you find it has the potential to be an interesting book. I especially appreciate the comment about the use of tension/relief elements. Yes, there is magic in music. Thank you for taking time to stop by to read and review.
Comment from Spitfire
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I like that you left it to the reader's imagination what the Fair Folk do to their captives. A thread of thought to keep the narrative going. Crisp dialogue between Piper and Reid-Lief who seems to have a magical power of flying long distances.
Music plays a big part in your story. One has only to watch a movie to see how a tune can set the mood.

Enjoyable story. I want to read on.

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2017
    Wow, six stars. I didn't expect that. Thank you, Shari! I appreciate you stopping in to read and review, and for the continued support. Thank you for mentioning the dialogue. And music to every writer's ears, that you want to read more.
    Have a wonderful evening.
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A very poetic beginning to this chapter;
the first line is brimming with poetic alliteration.
Interesting insight into the character of Redd-Leif
who appears to show true concern for both Rupert and Piper
Whether or not the troupe, with its healer, actually moved on
or whether Redd-Leif is taking advantage of the situation
will become clear at some later point.
Two elements are clear, Redd-Leif has unusual strength and speed,
that of a significant elf, and Piper's music is of deep magic
and, I suspect, has important power.
Another fine episode in the story
Well done!

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2017
    Six stars. I appreciate that so much! Thank you for the great review. I like the questions it raises in your mind, and your insights about what is happening. I appreciate you continuing to follow the story.
    Debi
Comment from Pam (respa)
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

-This is an excellent chapter, Debi.
-Excellent description of what had happened
to Piper and Rupert, plus the care given to them by Redd-Leif.
-I got the impression he wanted Piper to give him
details of what he remembered to help get Piper
back to his senses and also to know details of Rupert.
-After that, Redd-Leif explained the only way to help Rupert,
as his injuries were severe.
-The last part where he was instructed to play his flute was very good-
it was probably to keep him calm, as well as keep any unwonted creatures
away from the cave.
-I would assume that all will be well soon.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2017
    Hi Pam,
    Thank you for the six stars! and of course the comments. Your reviews are always so well thought out. I appreciate you taking time to give your analysis, insights and encouraging comments.
    Debi
reply by Pam (respa) on 14-Feb-2017
    You are very welcome and deserving, Debi. I really like the story, and this chapter was particularly good.
Comment from Zue65
Excellent
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Wow, the magical world of the flute and Piper , the fairies and the fae. I am really awed by writers who can conjure up settings and scenes never before explored. I salute to the imagination and creativity of writers like you. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the kind comments about the writing and the fantasy world it conjures. I appreciate the encouragement.
Comment from giraffmang
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi there,

Nice development in this instalment with Redd-Leif aiding the lads and the introduction of magic in the music.

"Yes, my boy?" - this feels more like a response than a question.

"How ..." - even though this trails off, it's still a question.

"Tell me the last thing you reminder." - remember?

or pipes, or ... so many things." Piper's voice trailed off - you could show the trailing off by using the ellipsis (...) rather than telling the reader.

Redd-Leif reached over an picked up a satchel. - and picked up.

"I sounds like everything is covered."- It sounds.

Good stuff
G

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2017
    Hi G,
    Thank you for the close read, and for catching the SPAG and the suggestions for improvement. I appreciate you continuing to follow the story. Your encouragement means a lot.
    Debi
Comment from rwilliam
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

W-O-W!!! I sooo enjoyed this chapter!! I HAVE to go back and catch up. I LOVE fantasy writing and you are doing great. You have me mesmerized and I have only read this chapter. That is GREAT writing, my friend! Great!

You have a gift for this. I didn't see any fixes! Bravo.

 Comment Written 13-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 13-Feb-2017
    Thank you for the wonderful six star rating! I appreciate the kind comments about the writing, and am so pleased that you enjoyed this chapter. Your review has me smiling. It has brightened my day. Thank you for taking the time to stop in to read and review.