Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Exceptional

I learned about addiction on a University course I did online and addiction could affect anyone. It sounds like this therapy group is going to help Brian as it is good to identify without someone else going through the same experiences. This is a decent girl who had a fantastic career ahead of her and her nerves got the better of her one day and this started her addiction. A realistic chapter Jim, much enjoyed, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks so much, Dolly, and for those 6 stars too. I'm very appreciative. These groups can be great for kids to let them know they aren't alone in their problems, and they learn alternatives too. There will be some more of this in the next couple of chapters.

reply by Dolly'sPoems on 11-Jul-2024

You are most welcome Jim, well deserved x

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

You're doing a great job describing the reality of addiction. Thank you.

He continued. "Barbiturates are one type of substance (continued,)

Julia resumed. "Last week, it was my dad's (resumed,)

Raffi glared at them, and Julia continued.

"My dad was in a good mood and offered me some wine with dinner. (continued, & you can move the next paragraph up a space)

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks, Barbara, and thanks also for those edits. I will change them.

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

An illuminating case study for Brian as well as enlightening the reader still more about the implications of drug abuse. The important element of Julia's story is the fact that she is a normal teenager from a loving home with a special talent to drive her ambition in life. And yet she still fell prey to an addiction, primarily through typical teenage angst and self-consciousness. This in turn demonstrates how easy the slide into this can be. Brian, on the other hand, has suffered the trauma of losing his parents and, arguably, has more reason to seek sanctuary in drugs. But the factor in common seems to be the psychological dependency that gives an artificial buzz that everything is good in the world, masking the grim reality that it isn't. I like your playful pun on fiddle at the end:)) Well done, Jim, on another faultless write expanding on this very prevalent problem in society. Debbie

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks very much, Debbie. I think your analysis of the situation is spot on, but I would also add that parental pressure can play a role.

Part of Julia's pressure to excel and always be the best and the accompanying nervousness about her performance came from the high expectations of her parents. That kind of pressure can be confusing to a child and they may unconsciously internalize it as "they won't love me unless I'm the best."

I felt some of this sort of pressure from my own mother and have written about it in a few postings. She always meant well by claiming I excelled in everything, thinking this would build my confidence, but it instead made me question her judgment.

Comment from Rachelle Allen

Excellent

This was extremely well done. You made Julia's story interesting and believable. The hecklers were annoying, but I can easily see how that would happen. Little rich virtuoso thinks SHE'S got problems? Clueless. There's a pecking order even in rehab.

Also, since Julia's a violinist, using this idiom:

Both of us started out by trying to cure one thing, but the original intent soon began ***playing second fiddle*** to the pleasure the drugs gave us. It was a conundrum.

Terrific chapter, Jim! xo

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks so much, Rachelle. You've probably seen a number of pressuring parents and their kids through the years. And it isn't in just music.

We tried never to pressure our kids in activities but just let them enjoy what they would. Our daughter, who was an excellent clarinetist and went on to get her masters degree in clarinet, put a lot of pressure on herself.

We had to encourage her NOT to practice so much and to have a little more balance in her life. Unfortunately, a career in an orchestra that paid a living wage was not in the cards for her, and she wisely switched careers, going back to school to get a degree in interior design, where she is now very successful.

reply by Rachelle Allen on 10-Jul-2024

Wow! Yes, I had a student who took voice, flute and piano from me and then auditioned to become a bassoonist for the Cleveland Symphony Orchestra with no success. There's even fewer bassoonists in an orchestra than clarinets, so she, too, switched careers and now is a Nurse Practitioner in the Emergency Dept of the Cleveland hospital! Your daughter at least chose something in the CREATIVE arts!! My student flabbergasted us ALL - her parents, included - when she went into medicine!!

reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

That's interesting. My daughter was always strong in both music and art, but art seem to come more naturally to her, and music was more of an effort, yet she first chose music as a career.

I followed a similar pattern, becoming a golf course superintendent before realizing it wasn't where my best skills lay, and then became a computer programmer and advanced in a career in the IT world where I was much happier and much more fulfilled.

My daughter has found much success in her career as an interior designer for a medium-sized design firm.

Comment from Pam Lonsdale

Excellent

The pressure that comes from parents . . . especially ones who are talented and accomplished. I would never want my 6 or 7 year old to be in an environment with high school kids. That's just wrong to begin with.

Having these things in the house always makes it tempting - no matter the drug (or alcohol).

I believe a lot of us have psychological addictions. I love having a glass of wine at the end of every day, before dinner while catching an hour of the news. When I go somewhere and get out of that routine, I don't miss it at all. But as soon as I return home . . .

"Playing second fiddle" - good one.

Another good chapter, Jim. This is a very interesting read.

xo
Pam

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

I would agree with your assessment. We never tried to pressure our daughter to excel in clarinet. We had to encourage her NOT to practice so much and to lead a more balanced life. She got her masters in clarinet and was hoping for a career in an orchestra that paid enough to live on, but the competition was too fierce for the few available clarinet jobs. She has since switched careers to interior design.

Thanks very much for your great review, Pam.

Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

Jim, I wish I had a six. Your writing is smoothly educating the reader about the attractions of addiction - and how easy it is to become hooked on the drugs, for psychologocaal as well as physical dependence reasons. The kids sound like real kids. Very authentic and realistic. Well done.
Wendy

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks so much, Wendy, and for the virtual 6. It's especially easy for teenagers to get hooked, I think, because they haven't achieved good sense yet and because of their air of invincibility. "I can try it a few times and I won't get addicted."

Comment from Tom Horonzy

Excellent

I found this to be a well-written piece, and it kept me interested from Alpha to Omega. Gladly, I never did dope. Why? Fear of the UCMJ. Leavenworth would have cured any addiction fast. I released a piece yesterday - Please Release Me. Your thoughts would be of interest.

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks, Tom. I thought it was about time for another ho-hum. I guess I've got to wait a little longer.

I'll give your piece a read soon.

Comment from BethShelby

Excellent

i find you information in this chapter very informative. It would help anyone coping with an adicting understand better what they are dealing iwth. Lately when I had dental work done I had to give up coffee which I sure I had a psychological addicting too. Instead of a large cup of coffee I started eating cereal with sugar in it. Now it seems I've switched my need for coffee for that of sugar. I don't too drugs but the call of certain foods is likely almost as bad.

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 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thank you, Beth. I can completely understand your swapping of addictions. The same thing often happens to me. Food, especially sweets, is my downfall too. Can't tell you how many times I've given them up, only to come back to them later. I'm largely off them right now, and feel much better for it (less arthritic pain), but who knows how long it will last this time?

Comment from Wayne Fowler

Excellent

Very cute girl in the picture.
This is another very well written chapter. I'm wondering who your target audience is: parents of addicted kids, people in therapy, or as a preventive - encouraged for all high schoolers?
Best wishes.

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 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

She is, isn't she.

All of the above; however, it may not be appropriate for high schoolers, as it gets pretty risque later in the book (but who knows these days?)

Comment from tfawcus

Exceptional

I can imagine this becoming required reading in certain circumstances. It is certainly a very clear description of the way people can become addicted. I was interested in Julia's story at a personal level as my son was similarly gifted on the violin, playing in the Senior School orchestra when he was nine. He experienced some of the same issues but not with the same disastrous consequences.

 Comment Written 10-Jul-2024

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reply by the author on 10-Jul-2024

Thanks very much, Tony, and for sharing about your daughter. My daughter, too, was a gifted clarinetist, perhaps not as gifted as Julia or your daughter, and found out the hard way that as a career, the massive competition for the very few clarinet jobs that can pay more than starvation wages was too much, and she wisely changed careers, becoming an interior designer. She is much happier now.

Unfortunately, she is so busy with work (kind of a workaholic), that she seldom plays her clarinet anymore.

I used to play duets with her when she was in 6th grade, but she quickly surpassed my capabilities, and I could no longer keep up with her.

What is your daughter doing now?

Thanks very much for the 6 stars. Really appreciated.