Heart Crafted Poems - 2022
Viewing comments for Chapter 83 "Wanting Silver Slippers"Musings of an old man - 2022
25 total reviews
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This is a lovely Villanelle JLR, with one simple request,
silver slippers to adorn my feet.
The 'golden stairs to heaven' verse is particularly poignant. Well done. Cheers
Valda
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2022
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This is a lovely Villanelle JLR, with one simple request,
silver slippers to adorn my feet.
The 'golden stairs to heaven' verse is particularly poignant. Well done. Cheers
Valda
Comment Written 23-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 24-Oct-2022
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Valda, I truly in vision your feet adorned with silver slippers as you dance on the golden stairs. Thanks, for the great six star validation.
Comment from TPAC
I love the play displayed in this particular read, sensing this playful wit by its composer, tingling tickles of an innocent soul with a warming heart. A rare encounter in my given opinion. I like the poem as this viewpoint of its composer, giving me at 70 years something to consider for self. Thank you.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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I love the play displayed in this particular read, sensing this playful wit by its composer, tingling tickles of an innocent soul with a warming heart. A rare encounter in my given opinion. I like the poem as this viewpoint of its composer, giving me at 70 years something to consider for self. Thank you.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Thank you, Sir!
Comment from Dawn Munro
This is a poetry format I like very much, especially when it is used in such a romantic and tender way. Dancing in the moonlight -- wow. A wish for silver slippers? Of course such beautiful things should adorn the feet on a magical night!
Lovely!
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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This is a poetry format I like very much, especially when it is used in such a romantic and tender way. Dancing in the moonlight -- wow. A wish for silver slippers? Of course such beautiful things should adorn the feet on a magical night!
Lovely!
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Thanks much!
Comment from jenintorre
I do hope you get the silver slippers although you seem to be doing very well without them. I loved your imagery in this poem and think the repetition works really well. Nice one. Jen.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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I do hope you get the silver slippers although you seem to be doing very well without them. I loved your imagery in this poem and think the repetition works really well. Nice one. Jen.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Thank you!
Comment from amahra
Thank you for posting this lovely poem. I really enjoyed the writing.
"...dance in the moonlight" and "I want silver slippers to adorn my feet, all right?" are fantastic repeat lines.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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Thank you for posting this lovely poem. I really enjoyed the writing.
"...dance in the moonlight" and "I want silver slippers to adorn my feet, all right?" are fantastic repeat lines.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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thank you very much!
Comment from Fleedleflump
Beautiful use of the form to evoke a continuing mood and create a genuinely effective result - I love that the final stanzas works so well, regardless its composition from the rest of the piece. I very much enjoyed.
Mike
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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Beautiful use of the form to evoke a continuing mood and create a genuinely effective result - I love that the final stanzas works so well, regardless its composition from the rest of the piece. I very much enjoyed.
Mike
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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Appreciate your views, Mike! Thanks.
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Nice artwork and presentation.
-A well written Villanelle with effective imagery, rhyme, and repeating lines.
-I like the music and dance theme, as well as the moonlight. Those are classic things that go together well.
-The poem flows well from verse to verse with the situations you describe.
-The use of "swirl and twirl" is very good, and I like the last two verses with "golden stairs" and dancing solo."
-Very well done.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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-Nice artwork and presentation.
-A well written Villanelle with effective imagery, rhyme, and repeating lines.
-I like the music and dance theme, as well as the moonlight. Those are classic things that go together well.
-The poem flows well from verse to verse with the situations you describe.
-The use of "swirl and twirl" is very good, and I like the last two verses with "golden stairs" and dancing solo."
-Very well done.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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I do thank you!
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You are welcome!
Comment from MissMerri
I very much like this form and think you did a wonderful job with it. It is a most difficult pattern to follow, but when done right, such a delight! I thought your rhymes were so creative and the mood you managed to elicit was beautiful and rather whimsical at the same time. Good word choices and a lovely Villanelle that I very much enjoyed. MM
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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I very much like this form and think you did a wonderful job with it. It is a most difficult pattern to follow, but when done right, such a delight! I thought your rhymes were so creative and the mood you managed to elicit was beautiful and rather whimsical at the same time. Good word choices and a lovely Villanelle that I very much enjoyed. MM
Comment Written 18-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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Thank you MissMeri, for these very kind and supportive words.
Comment from Michaela Moore
I adore the line you chose to be the repetitive line in this poem. The tone of it is perfectly aligned with your subject and your imagery. I would like to dance in silver shoes in the moonlight too. Where do you find such magical footwear?
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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I adore the line you chose to be the repetitive line in this poem. The tone of it is perfectly aligned with your subject and your imagery. I would like to dance in silver shoes in the moonlight too. Where do you find such magical footwear?
Comment Written 17-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2022
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They perhaps are just one dreamy night of sleep away. 🤔
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Jim,
This is a nicely done metaphor about how you want to be dressed for the time of death. I would be happy to be dressed ready to dance and celebrate too.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
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Hi Jim,
This is a nicely done metaphor about how you want to be dressed for the time of death. I would be happy to be dressed ready to dance and celebrate too.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Joan
Comment Written 17-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2022
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Thank you for seeing the message.
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I try my best.
Joan
