Tonight's Victim Was Kathleen
Triplets29 total reviews
Comment from Dean Kuch
Ah, Lizzie tomorrow, Mary the day after...
This was chilling stuff, Pam. Piano wire strung 'round the neck, that can nearly decapitate a victim. Not that I would know from personal experience, or anything...
Well, gotta' go, Mary's waiting, heh-heh...
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
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Ah, Lizzie tomorrow, Mary the day after...
This was chilling stuff, Pam. Piano wire strung 'round the neck, that can nearly decapitate a victim. Not that I would know from personal experience, or anything...
Well, gotta' go, Mary's waiting, heh-heh...
Comment Written 14-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2013
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Hmmmm been looking through my portfolio eh Dean. Haahaha this was fun.
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Yep. I often go through the horror section to see if any of my favorite writers here have done anything in my beloved genre. And, lo and behold, I typed in "Gungalo", and look what popped up, LOL...
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LOL horror section? Where?
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When you go to FanStory's home page, if you scroll all the way down and look to your left, you'll see a "categories" section. There's spiritual, Horror, Love Poems, etc. So, say if you wanted to know whether or not Dean Kuch ever wrote any Love Poems. You click on that category, type in the name of the author, and, viola!
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Ahhh I've learned something new. Thanks you.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
What a sad poem about a man brutally killing an innocent girl just because her name started with his desired letter. He is a psychopath. After killing, all he can think about is his shoes making noise,rain hitting his cheeks etc. Well written but tragic. Debbie
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2010
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What a sad poem about a man brutally killing an innocent girl just because her name started with his desired letter. He is a psychopath. After killing, all he can think about is his shoes making noise,rain hitting his cheeks etc. Well written but tragic. Debbie
Comment Written 05-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2010
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It's the way they think, Deb. Thanks for your awesome review. A tragic story, no doubt.
Comment from Isaiah Ramesses
So you have a bit of a dark side as well. I've written of the serial killer's mind more than once. You've made this artistic and suspenseful with your choice of words. Great read.
Isaiah
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2010
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So you have a bit of a dark side as well. I've written of the serial killer's mind more than once. You've made this artistic and suspenseful with your choice of words. Great read.
Isaiah
Comment Written 05-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 05-Dec-2010
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Oh yeah and this one is nothing compared to some. LOL. Bet yours are awesome!!!! Thanks you!
Comment from dmxn2k
Now this is a great piece of flash fiction. It opens with suspense, reaches a climax, and leaves the ending open.
It's amazing that the ending opens up ideas of a story in which ten women were killed, all with the same M-O.
It makes the scene at the beginning seem so minuscule if not for the fact that it presents what happened 10 times before. But I wonder, could the other murders have been more difficult? Is this the first one that may lead to a clue? Is there something about Lizzy that will interrupt the ease at which this serial killer is progressing?
That's what an excellent flash fiction is about.
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Now this is a great piece of flash fiction. It opens with suspense, reaches a climax, and leaves the ending open.
It's amazing that the ending opens up ideas of a story in which ten women were killed, all with the same M-O.
It makes the scene at the beginning seem so minuscule if not for the fact that it presents what happened 10 times before. But I wonder, could the other murders have been more difficult? Is this the first one that may lead to a clue? Is there something about Lizzy that will interrupt the ease at which this serial killer is progressing?
That's what an excellent flash fiction is about.
Comment Written 04-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Wow you!!! What a great review. A quickie here, just a flash of an idea that wrote itself. Thank you so very much!!!
Comment from Ghosterb
Ohhhhhh now this was a bit of a change! Murder and mystery...I like it!
Very convincingly told my friend. A very good tale this was indeed.
Nicely done!
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Ohhhhhh now this was a bit of a change! Murder and mystery...I like it!
Very convincingly told my friend. A very good tale this was indeed.
Nicely done!
Comment Written 04-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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A bit different eh? LOL, glad you enjoyed reading it you. MUAHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from lishareading
Very interesting topic for you, my friend. I found it a very exciting read, and enjoyed the anxiety of the girl and the thrill the murderer felt as he walked in the rain. The picture definitely was a great addition to this piece.
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Very interesting topic for you, my friend. I found it a very exciting read, and enjoyed the anxiety of the girl and the thrill the murderer felt as he walked in the rain. The picture definitely was a great addition to this piece.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Hey thanks, sweet poet!!! A real change of pace eh? I love the dark side and this was a reeal quickie!!
Comment from Pili Pubul
Excellent and very chilling poem about a sociopath serial killer, the images are amazing so is the style and psychological description, it is truly chilling. WOW.
When he was merely a hair's breath away
she turned suddenly and gasped ...
it was the last breath she'd ever take.
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Excellent and very chilling poem about a sociopath serial killer, the images are amazing so is the style and psychological description, it is truly chilling. WOW.
When he was merely a hair's breath away
she turned suddenly and gasped ...
it was the last breath she'd ever take.
Comment Written 03-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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LOL a real dark one, eh? MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH I had fun writing this one girl. A very quick write indeed!! Thanks for reading my dark side!!!
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You are so welcome !
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Hey hey girlie!!! How are ya today?
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I am oky duky , and you
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Grrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!!!
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Gungalita I am with a very bad cold, fever and dizzy, will be back as soon as I can , I am getting better. Big hugs.
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Be well sweet poet. Sigh, a prayer goes out for you. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Comment from Tillom Gliss
I don't like scary.
Aside from content, this was a smooth, well plotted, perfect diction, surprising (mostly on account I didn't expect this) tale.
I'm kinda speechless...I really didn't expect this. It's really well done, just didn't expect it. : )
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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I don't like scary.
Aside from content, this was a smooth, well plotted, perfect diction, surprising (mostly on account I didn't expect this) tale.
I'm kinda speechless...I really didn't expect this. It's really well done, just didn't expect it. : )
Comment Written 03-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Dec-2010
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Oops, I do that from time to time. Run over to the dark side to take a break from all the love poetry. Poor baby, you'll be okay. Heheh, I just love ya!!!
Comment from closetpoetjester
Oooh this was downright thrilling and very nasty to say the least Gunga. Very well written and the imagery created by the words drew this reader straight in. Nicely narrated and told a story of horror for not only Kathleen, but Lizzy, Mary, Nelly, Olga, Pamela, Q..okay I am stopping at Q...too hard that one!
Great write and good luck in this flash fiction contest with a very well presented entry.
I liked the ending the best and these bits:
"from shadows that danced on the walls"
"When he was merely a hair's breath away"
Very well done and nice to see you attack something gory.
Cheers closet xoxo
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2010
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Oooh this was downright thrilling and very nasty to say the least Gunga. Very well written and the imagery created by the words drew this reader straight in. Nicely narrated and told a story of horror for not only Kathleen, but Lizzy, Mary, Nelly, Olga, Pamela, Q..okay I am stopping at Q...too hard that one!
Great write and good luck in this flash fiction contest with a very well presented entry.
I liked the ending the best and these bits:
"from shadows that danced on the walls"
"When he was merely a hair's breath away"
Very well done and nice to see you attack something gory.
Cheers closet xoxo
Comment Written 03-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2010
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LOL, ooooooooooooooh, glad you liked this one and it's not a contest entry either. LOL, it's just a break from my norm. I run to the dark side when I need a change of pace. MUAHHHHHHHHHHH.
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Excellent write.
BTW I have culled 90% of my notes...thanks for the great advice.
I will try to be mindful of that in future Gunga.
Cheers closet xo
PS Oh I thought it was a contest entry ...didn't look properly ...sorry.
x
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Okay, ultimately it is up to you but I gotta tell ya when I see it I cringe. I read a great poem and then see a break down of the whole thing. Aggghhh. I'll just skip your comments. LOL. I love ya girlie!!!
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Some people love em...some people don't...I am taking your advice and gonna at least try and cull it where I don't need to explain...
xx
Comment from Jen Gentry
Creepy scary oh my god chills running up and down my spine is this just your imagination or is there some truth to this one ???????????? :0)
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2010
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Creepy scary oh my god chills running up and down my spine is this just your imagination or is there some truth to this one ???????????? :0)
Comment Written 03-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 03-Dec-2010
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Been told there actually has been a serial killer they referred to as the Alphabet Killer and that's just what he did. Thanks you.
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ewwwwwww weeeee scary!!!