| Biographical Non-Fiction posted December 5, 2023 | Chapters: |
...14 15 -16- 17... 
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We waited for the man to return.
A chapter in the book Spectre
The Suspense
by Lea Tonin1
Slip from sleep the terrible quake.
Cracks in truth which she did make.
Spreads the hate I cannot shake.
Stomps my heart a
bloodless ache.
She should fear what she can't see.
For karma comes and there I'll be.
Handing out her blasphemy.
Maelstrom strikes, sets me free.
A cancer formed three generations back.
A lie of shame threw the next off track.
Integrity a trait that they lack.
Her soul to me shines only black.
Slip the chains that bind the abused.
They have no power...anymore.
************************************
The holiday season is upon us. It's hard for me, as I usually spend it alone. The holiday season can get a smile or two from me it's true. Just watching the people around me, the decorations, bright lights, the people hustling and bustling.
However, I am going to inject a little bit of ho ho humor.
Do you know the story of how the angel got on the Christmas tree?
Well Santa and Mrs. Claus were having a really hard year. All they did was argue and fight. The dwarfs weren't doing their job and the reindeer were on strike. All was mayhem. After a while An angel came bouncing in with a large green pine tree.
"Santa look! What shall I do with this tree?"
And that's the story of how the angel got on the tree....
***
Levity is required in life. I swear if we didn't have it, we'd have all gone nuts a long time ago!
Some of you may wonder how could so much mayhem happen to one person? I grew up with it. I knew nothing else. Everyday was a struggle to survive. I learned nothing of relationships and how to deal with people. I knew nothing of how to survive on the outside. Except for what I'd already done in self defense. I've stumbled around in the dark, made many mistakes with people, placement and circumstance. It's what I was used to and in an almost gravitational direction, I found myself going to it tiny and again.
There was lots of mayhem and the it continued with every lesson I had to learn. I've made stupid decisions, went to stupid places and hurt in stupid ways.
I understand the girl I was today but not then.
I didn't know much about anything really.
The repercussions of abuse don't stop when you leave the abusive environment. No, it reverberates throughout lifetimes and passes on generationally.
I'll go back to my PC now.
We'll take that trip back again to see....
*****************************
After cleaning up the broken glass and busted furniture, we then sat for some Chai tea.
I studied Mrs. D for signs of pain which she clearly had on her swollen, finger printed neck. I rose and took a tea towel from the drawer and some ice cubes from the freezer. I placed them inside the towel which I passed to her and she placed it gently on her neck.
"My husband has bad temper by God. Always mad about something," Mrs. D said.
"Will he hurt the kids?" I asked tentatively.
"Not our culture, not for boys. Husband has all rights over wife. He is allowed to lightly beat his wife."
"So he can do what he likes to you? I asked incredulously.
"He cannot kill me," she replied.
"That's a relief, I answered a bit sarcastically. "How long do you think he'll be gone?"
"Could be today, could be next week," she replied.
"Okay, well, I don't want to leave you alone. I should stay here just in case."
She looked at me and reluctantly agreed.
"I don't know what he will say when he comes back. If joo see, joo go down stairs. I talk to him."
"Ok, but I can't sit still if I hear more yelling and banging." I replied. She nodded in response.
It seemed the night crept away, and the sun was rising after all. The dispersal of rays through the windows managed to lift some of the gloom. Not long after, the two young boys woke.
Rubbing their eyes, they smiled shyly at me. One gave me the peace sign. I signed back and smiled.
What seemed like rapid-fire conversation happened between them. Their language always sounded so very fast to me.
Mrs. D looked at me. "Joo have breakfast?" Her voice still sounded sore and raspy.
I smiled, "Yes, thank you."
"No," she said..."I thank you." Then offered me a smile.
She made a simple meal of rice with egg, naan bread with a glass of milk. I got the impression that life in this manner was normal for them.
It seems the same with other indian families too.
I also learned something else.
My rage is not solely for my own purposes, but rears its head quickly when others are abused as well.
Still, I didn't know what was going to happen.
I settled for breakfast for time being.
Plenty of time ahead for worry....I thought.
*****************************
Slip from sleep the terrible quake.
Cracks in truth which she did make.
Spreads the hate I cannot shake.
Stomps my heart a
bloodless ache.
She should fear what she can't see.
For karma comes and there I'll be.
Handing out her blasphemy.
Maelstrom strikes, sets me free.
A cancer formed three generations back.
A lie of shame threw the next off track.
Integrity a trait that they lack.
Her soul to me shines only black.
Slip the chains that bind the abused.
They have no power...anymore.
************************************
The holiday season is upon us. It's hard for me, as I usually spend it alone. The holiday season can get a smile or two from me it's true. Just watching the people around me, the decorations, bright lights, the people hustling and bustling.
However, I am going to inject a little bit of ho ho humor.
Do you know the story of how the angel got on the Christmas tree?
Well Santa and Mrs. Claus were having a really hard year. All they did was argue and fight. The dwarfs weren't doing their job and the reindeer were on strike. All was mayhem. After a while An angel came bouncing in with a large green pine tree.
"Santa look! What shall I do with this tree?"
And that's the story of how the angel got on the tree....
***
Levity is required in life. I swear if we didn't have it, we'd have all gone nuts a long time ago!
Some of you may wonder how could so much mayhem happen to one person? I grew up with it. I knew nothing else. Everyday was a struggle to survive. I learned nothing of relationships and how to deal with people. I knew nothing of how to survive on the outside. Except for what I'd already done in self defense. I've stumbled around in the dark, made many mistakes with people, placement and circumstance. It's what I was used to and in an almost gravitational direction, I found myself going to it tiny and again.
There was lots of mayhem and the it continued with every lesson I had to learn. I've made stupid decisions, went to stupid places and hurt in stupid ways.
I understand the girl I was today but not then.
I didn't know much about anything really.
The repercussions of abuse don't stop when you leave the abusive environment. No, it reverberates throughout lifetimes and passes on generationally.
I'll go back to my PC now.
We'll take that trip back again to see....
*****************************
After cleaning up the broken glass and busted furniture, we then sat for some Chai tea.
I studied Mrs. D for signs of pain which she clearly had on her swollen, finger printed neck. I rose and took a tea towel from the drawer and some ice cubes from the freezer. I placed them inside the towel which I passed to her and she placed it gently on her neck.
"My husband has bad temper by God. Always mad about something," Mrs. D said.
"Will he hurt the kids?" I asked tentatively.
"Not our culture, not for boys. Husband has all rights over wife. He is allowed to lightly beat his wife."
"So he can do what he likes to you? I asked incredulously.
"He cannot kill me," she replied.
"That's a relief, I answered a bit sarcastically. "How long do you think he'll be gone?"
"Could be today, could be next week," she replied.
"Okay, well, I don't want to leave you alone. I should stay here just in case."
She looked at me and reluctantly agreed.
"I don't know what he will say when he comes back. If joo see, joo go down stairs. I talk to him."
"Ok, but I can't sit still if I hear more yelling and banging." I replied. She nodded in response.
It seemed the night crept away, and the sun was rising after all. The dispersal of rays through the windows managed to lift some of the gloom. Not long after, the two young boys woke.
Rubbing their eyes, they smiled shyly at me. One gave me the peace sign. I signed back and smiled.
What seemed like rapid-fire conversation happened between them. Their language always sounded so very fast to me.
Mrs. D looked at me. "Joo have breakfast?" Her voice still sounded sore and raspy.
I smiled, "Yes, thank you."
"No," she said..."I thank you." Then offered me a smile.
She made a simple meal of rice with egg, naan bread with a glass of milk. I got the impression that life in this manner was normal for them.
It seems the same with other indian families too.
I also learned something else.
My rage is not solely for my own purposes, but rears its head quickly when others are abused as well.
Still, I didn't know what was going to happen.
I settled for breakfast for time being.
Plenty of time ahead for worry....I thought.
*****************************
This story is a chapter in an auto bio called Spectre book 2 in the series. Book one is called Ghost. Both can be found in my portfolio should you wish to read. One word of caution, some chapters are hard to digest. Reader discretion is advised.
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