FanStory.com - What We See - Chapter 4by Jim Wile

Chapter 4

I awoke on Saturday morning feeling a gentle bite on my nose. I guess I managed to get a few hours of sleep. This was the usual pattern around 6:00 each morning. My four-legged alarm clock was telling me it was time to get up and get him his breakfast. He had places to go and things to do.

“Alright, Arch. Thanks for not drawing blood this morning.” Archie is a biter. I’m not sure if he’s ever gotten out of the oral stage of his development or if there is even such a thing for cats. He’s always used his mouth to get my attention when I’m ignoring him. As much as I used to tell him not to, he never learned, so I just go with it now. He’s as affectionate as can be, but he seems to have a certain amount of biting he must do each day to fill his quota. I’ve taken to donning a heavy winter glove and mock-fighting with him, which is a game he loves.

I dragged myself out of bed, threw on a pair of sweat pants, and went downstairs with him to get him his food. He’ll let himself out afterwards through his cat door. I put on my running shoes and a windbreaker and went out for an early morning run.

I jogged through the dark over to the high school and got on the track to run. I planned to run five miles this morning, which usually takes me 35 minutes. I tried to keep my mind clear while I ran, but this was difficult. I kept trying to figure out why Tina had it in for me. Could she really be that evil that she’d be willing to ruin my reputation over a simple rejection? It’s not like I was mean to her about it. I tried to be polite but firm with her. It’s just hard to believe she would do this.

As I got near the end of the run, I ran as hard as I could in hopes of blocking out all thoughts and just concentrating on speed. This worked well, but unfortunately, I couldn’t keep up that pace for more than a mile, and I walked home after that while catching my breath.

It was mid-afternoon when the phone rang. It felt like my heart dropped when I heard it, and then my pulse quickened.

“Hello, Earl.”

“David, this is a difficult situation we have here. I must admit, I was taken aback by your remark that you love Tina and—”

“Please let me try to explain that, Earl. I did—”

“I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t interrupt. I’ll say what I have to say and let you respond. As I was going to say, I can understand an infatuation with a good-looking young girl like Tina. After all, you’re a young man, and those feelings are normal for young men. But as educators, we cannot act on them. It’s completely inappropriate for teachers to have physical relations with students. It can be very devastating to the students in the short run and the long run. No good can come of it. I’m sure you understand that. Now I’ve got two different versions of the story here and not much to go on except the physical bruises to Tina’s neck. And now your confession of love for her. But why would you want to choke her if you love her?”

It took me a few moments to gather my thoughts and respond to this. “I didn’t want to choke her, and I don’t love her. I…” but I went into a long pause then, trying to decide what to say next.

Earl cut in, “Then why did you say you loved her? And now you say you didn’t want to choke her, which says to me that maybe she was resisting you, and things got out of hand.”

“No, Earl. It’s not like that. Give me a moment to catch my breath, and I’ll try to escape… explain.” My heart was pounding, and all my saliva had dried up. I had to get myself under control, or I would keep making slips like that last one. I took a couple of deep breaths and resumed.

“I’ve never told you this before because I never thought it mattered, but I am dyslexic, and it’s not uncommon for me to mix up my words, especially when I’m nervous, and I’m pretty nervous right now, as I was yesterday in your office. When I said, “I love Tina, I was trying to say I love teaching, and I would never do anything to jeopardize that by fooling around with a student, but you wouldn’t let me continue. So, I’ll say it again. I would never fool around with a student.”

There was a long pause before Pinkham spoke again. He was most likely mulling over how probable this dyslexia thing was. For all he knew, I could have made it up to explain away that admission of love.

“Alright, David. Maybe you didn’t love her, but you could have still desired her, and when she wouldn’t put out, you attacked her.”

“It didn’t happen, Earl. I had no interest in her at all that way. I don’t even like her very much, truth be told. I shouldn’t have let her in my house when she came over. That was poor judgment. As I told you yesterday, I tried to call Suzie to inform her that Tina had come uninvited to seek help for the exam, and when she made it clear to me that was not what she’d come for, I made it clear to her that I was not interested. She was angry about it, but she left. I don’t know what else I can say.”

“Then how do you explain the bruises? If your story’s true, wouldn’t it be a remarkable coincidence if she comes home all bruised on the same night she was at your house? She didn’t come to your house bruised, did she?”

“And she didn’t leave it bruised either. I believe there’s probably a good expiration… explanation, I just don’t know what it is. But it happened after she left my house. Someone else must have attacked her.”

After a long pause, Pinkham finally said, “Look, David, I’m being pulled in several directions here. I have to do what’s best for the school, and if there’s any doubt, I have to come down on the side of the student. We want to avoid a situation where students feel unsafe around you. Even if it’s like you say, there will always be doubt and fear from now on. Would you really want to remain here in that case?”

“I love my job. I don’t want to let a lie force me out of it. Maybe we should get the police involved? Perhaps they can find the truth of the matter.”

“Tina and Suzie haven’t reported it to the police and aren’t planning to press charges. The police won’t investigate this if they don’t have to; they’ll leave it alone as a school issue to be handled in-house. I can make this simple for you, David. I’ve always liked you, and I don’t want this to go on your record in case you decide to teach elsewhere, so I’m willing to let you resign, and there will be no mention of this incident. In the future, if I’m called as a reference for a job position you may be seeking, I will even give you a good review, and we can work out a story for why you resigned. Take the offer, David. I think it will help salvage as much of your reputation as possible if you do.”

I could feel the adrenaline coursing through my chest and gut. My mouth was completely dry, and I actually gagged. I was grimacing like crazy, but there was no one to see it. This is my career. This is my livelihood that’s about to go up in flames. All I’ve wanted to do is teach since that time in 11th grade when Mr. Hafner showed me that I could beat my disability. But how do you beat the opinions of others? This is so unfair. It may not go in my official record, but everyone will know about it. The whole faculty already knows, and it won’t be long before the whole town knows. This is a fairly small town, and word gets around fast.

“S-sounds like I don’t have much of a choice. It’s either resign or be fired, right?”

“That’s about the size of it. David, if you didn’t do it, I know this seems unfair, but that’s just the way it is. There will always be whisperings. Parents will request that their daughters not be put in your classes. I don’t think you’ll be happy if you remain under suspicion the rest of your time here.”

As much as I hated to admit it, the son-of-a-bitch was probably right. Once destroyed, reputations are almost impossible to win back. There will always be doubt. After a full minute, I said, “Alright, Earl. I’ll do it.”

“Thank you, David. I really think this is for the best. If you could type up a resignation letter and bring it to my office tomorrow—Sunday—around, say, 2:00 PM, we can conclude matters, and you can clear out your personal belongings from the school.”

“Okay, 2:00,” and I hung up.