Surprise!
Now that is real FLASH fiction!28 total reviews
Comment from LateBloomer
Hi Doug, This is a fun and gritty story. I could see this scene playing itself out on 43rd Street and Tenth Avenue in NYC, right after exiting the Lincoln Tunnel. I like the twist at the end of the story. As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck. Margaret ~ LateBloomer
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2024
Hi Doug, This is a fun and gritty story. I could see this scene playing itself out on 43rd Street and Tenth Avenue in NYC, right after exiting the Lincoln Tunnel. I like the twist at the end of the story. As this is a contest entry, I wish you good luck. Margaret ~ LateBloomer
Comment Written 18-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 18-Apr-2024
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Hey, how did you know it was me? You are too smart
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Your name was on the story. I don't think that it was a blind entry. M
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Sorry. My 50% idiot side has been running rampant this week.
Appreciate you!
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That's ok. With so many different types of contests, it's difficult to keep track of what is what. M
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
An excellent entry for the 100 Word Flash Fiction Contest. This story is perfect with a. Twist ending to beat all twist endings. I imagine he just inched his way back into oblivion LOL. Good luck.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2024
An excellent entry for the 100 Word Flash Fiction Contest. This story is perfect with a. Twist ending to beat all twist endings. I imagine he just inched his way back into oblivion LOL. Good luck.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2024
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Ha! Too funny! This one still makes me laugh when I read it. Thank you for the awesome rating!
D
Comment from papa55mike
Don't you hate it when that happens? The slunk and shriveling in the last line were nice touches. Pun intended. What a wonderfully written and revealing piece. Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
Don't you hate it when that happens? The slunk and shriveling in the last line were nice touches. Pun intended. What a wonderfully written and revealing piece. Good luck in the contest!
Have a great day, and God bless.
mike
Comment Written 17-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Papa! Appreciate the sixer! This little story took everyone by surprise.
Comment from Begin Again
OMG! What has this world come to... You certainly used your imagination with this one, Doug. Not only was your "victim" surprised, but so was the reader. Thanks for the laugh.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
OMG! What has this world come to... You certainly used your imagination with this one, Doug. Not only was your "victim" surprised, but so was the reader. Thanks for the laugh.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 17-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
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I pushed the envelop here!
Comment from Sanku
Ha ha this was really funny .I was sure he was going to get it from her ,but this was totally unexpected.. A nice funny flash fiction all the best for the contest..
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
Ha ha this was really funny .I was sure he was going to get it from her ,but this was totally unexpected.. A nice funny flash fiction all the best for the contest..
Comment Written 17-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
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Thank you! Now that is a twist!
Comment from Mark Jackson
That elicited a laugh from me, perhaps reluctantly. This is very funny. I guess it is a taboo subject which is always good to investigate using humour. I had guessed the pervert was to get his comeuppance but I would never have guessed how. I really like the ending, shriveling away. Good luck in the competition.
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
That elicited a laugh from me, perhaps reluctantly. This is very funny. I guess it is a taboo subject which is always good to investigate using humour. I had guessed the pervert was to get his comeuppance but I would never have guessed how. I really like the ending, shriveling away. Good luck in the competition.
Comment Written 17-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 17-Apr-2024
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Too funny!
Comment from prettybluebirds
I love this story. It is hilarious. The conclusion was a total surprise for this reader. Well, it was also a surprise for your main character. I wish you tons of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
I love this story. It is hilarious. The conclusion was a total surprise for this reader. Well, it was also a surprise for your main character. I wish you tons of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 16-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
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Thank you! This one caught people by surprise!
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Come on! This is funny, I don't care who you are. I was not expecting that. I am rarely surprised. Thank you so much. I wish you good luck in the contest. Good writing. Karen
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
Come on! This is funny, I don't care who you are. I was not expecting that. I am rarely surprised. Thank you so much. I wish you good luck in the contest. Good writing. Karen
Comment Written 16-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
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Thank you! This one has taken everyone by surprise!
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u did good
Comment from Natureschild
The story offered a twist that surprised me. The predatory behaviour of the perpetrator and the unexpected revelation of the woman's anatomy counteracts the dynamics resulting in a reversal of confidence. I think you did well to convey the power play in 100 words. I wish you good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
The story offered a twist that surprised me. The predatory behaviour of the perpetrator and the unexpected revelation of the woman's anatomy counteracts the dynamics resulting in a reversal of confidence. I think you did well to convey the power play in 100 words. I wish you good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 16-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
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Thank you! Seems to have taken everyone by surprise!
Comment from Dimzdale1
A pervert's justice. I honestly wasn't expecting the hermaphrodite twist with the current age of women liberation. I thought she would laugh a say she saw bigger on her girlfriend and pick up a dropped whip or chain that fell when she revealed her own perversion. I feel dirty now, I think I'll take a shower and say a few Hail Mary's, although I'm not Catholic. Thank you for the unusual mood you put me in:-).
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
A pervert's justice. I honestly wasn't expecting the hermaphrodite twist with the current age of women liberation. I thought she would laugh a say she saw bigger on her girlfriend and pick up a dropped whip or chain that fell when she revealed her own perversion. I feel dirty now, I think I'll take a shower and say a few Hail Mary's, although I'm not Catholic. Thank you for the unusual mood you put me in:-).
Comment Written 16-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2024
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Ha! Gives one the shivers.