You Never Were on Time
A Timeless Betrayal37 total reviews
Comment from Ronny Guy
I love this. It sounds like a song. Did you make that scketch yourself? ...the one that's at the beginning of the poem. If so, you are very good at scketching just like you are at writing poems. Do you write songs?
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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I love this. It sounds like a song. Did you make that scketch yourself? ...the one that's at the beginning of the poem. If so, you are very good at scketching just like you are at writing poems. Do you write songs?
Comment Written 28-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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Ronny, thank you so much! The sketch is not mine (though I wish it was). I am so pleased you picked up on the musical quality intended in the poem. I have thought about turning it into a song. I used to do some singing, and my writing journey began with lyrics.
Thank you for the wonderful comment.
xo
Jess
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You're welcome, AND you're a very beautiful woman.
Comment from Teri7
Jessica, This is a very well written poem you have penned for the Betrayal contest. You used great descriptive words and great imagery from the artwork you chose and your words. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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Jessica, This is a very well written poem you have penned for the Betrayal contest. You used great descriptive words and great imagery from the artwork you chose and your words. Best wishes in the contest. Teri
Comment Written 28-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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Teri, I truly appreciate it. Thanks so much!
xo
Jess
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Congrats on the success of your poem. It's well deserved! Your poem is so emotional. I like how you have repetition for "you said" and "I tried". It shows the painful difference between what was promised and what came to be. "I guess you're running late" is so powerful and touching. This is a deeply moving poem. It's got a powerful message and is seems to be carefully composed. Great job!
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Congrats on the success of your poem. It's well deserved! Your poem is so emotional. I like how you have repetition for "you said" and "I tried". It shows the painful difference between what was promised and what came to be. "I guess you're running late" is so powerful and touching. This is a deeply moving poem. It's got a powerful message and is seems to be carefully composed. Great job!
Comment Written 26-Sep-2024
Comment from Samantha Quinn Snow
This is a beautifully somber piece. Every line feels important and it flows so gracefully. It really gets across the heartache of losing someone to addiction. If this is based on real events my heart goes out to you and I understand your pain.
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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This is a beautifully somber piece. Every line feels important and it flows so gracefully. It really gets across the heartache of losing someone to addiction. If this is based on real events my heart goes out to you and I understand your pain.
Comment Written 26-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
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Thank you so much, Samantha. That really means the world.
Xo
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
A beautiful entry for the Betrayal Poetry contest. I really enjoyed your 8 -6-14 syllable format. Does this have a certain name or did you just make it up? Your final 4 lines were so good and that final line put the stamp on it. Good luck in the contest.
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A beautiful entry for the Betrayal Poetry contest. I really enjoyed your 8 -6-14 syllable format. Does this have a certain name or did you just make it up? Your final 4 lines were so good and that final line put the stamp on it. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2024
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem, You Never Were on Time, shakes the people around us as the truth of loved ones following that sad road of drugs is once again laid out for all survivors to deal with.
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2024
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This poem, You Never Were on Time, shakes the people around us as the truth of loved ones following that sad road of drugs is once again laid out for all survivors to deal with.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2024
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That means a lot, Bill; thank you! Xoxo
Comment from Jim Wile
Wow, Jess! What a powerful poem. I know you've written about this subject a number of times, but this is the first time I can remember your writing about the betrayal you felt. I think it's good and healthy that you've expressed these feelings in this way as difficult as it may have been for you to do that.
I know you question whether there was anything more you might have done to prevent it, but ultimately one must take responsibility for their own life. Others can do only so much to help. I know I'm not privy to everything that must have been going on in your lives, but from what I've read, it sounds like you did about everything you could have done.
This was a beautiful, haunting poem, and I imagine the double-entendre of the final word was intentional.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Wow, Jess! What a powerful poem. I know you've written about this subject a number of times, but this is the first time I can remember your writing about the betrayal you felt. I think it's good and healthy that you've expressed these feelings in this way as difficult as it may have been for you to do that.
I know you question whether there was anything more you might have done to prevent it, but ultimately one must take responsibility for their own life. Others can do only so much to help. I know I'm not privy to everything that must have been going on in your lives, but from what I've read, it sounds like you did about everything you could have done.
This was a beautiful, haunting poem, and I imagine the double-entendre of the final word was intentional.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2024
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Jim, you know me well. Thank you so much for your review and your kindness. It's funny; I began writing this a couple of years ago, then set it aside for a while because I couldn't quite get the rhythm I wanted behind the words. This was obviously before my meter man lessons. Lol, The impact of your guidance is immeasurable, and I'll be forever grateful!!!
Xo
Jess
Comment from talented150
You are very talented, and your poem is excellent. You have a way with words, and the emotion comes through very well. You draw me into the emotions you are feeling for another person who has let you down. I come away, feeling the sadness you feel with the break-up. These are feelings that most of us have felt at one time or another in our lives. I loved your poem.
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You are very talented, and your poem is excellent. You have a way with words, and the emotion comes through very well. You draw me into the emotions you are feeling for another person who has let you down. I come away, feeling the sadness you feel with the break-up. These are feelings that most of us have felt at one time or another in our lives. I loved your poem.
Comment Written 25-Sep-2024
Comment from Wendy G
A tragic betrayal of promises as it seems a sibling has turned to drugs, (stanzas 3, 4 and 6 in particular), made a choice to cross the line. It's filled wit despair and almost anger at the betrayal - and yet there is understanding of what has happened, and she tried, how hard she tried, but could not save the other. Poignant - and brilliant. Best wishes for the contest.
Wendy
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A tragic betrayal of promises as it seems a sibling has turned to drugs, (stanzas 3, 4 and 6 in particular), made a choice to cross the line. It's filled wit despair and almost anger at the betrayal - and yet there is understanding of what has happened, and she tried, how hard she tried, but could not save the other. Poignant - and brilliant. Best wishes for the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 25-Sep-2024
Comment from ElPoetry001
An excellent explanation as to why we must continue to try to assist everyone that has the burden of Mental illness; the universal albatross that embraces all of mankind.
Being depressed, to psychotic breaks; we all face the burden of trying to embrace reality.
Your challenges, and attempts at solutions, while trying to help another person, is inspiring.
We cannot give up on our efforts to provide answers and solutions to mental illnesses.
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An excellent explanation as to why we must continue to try to assist everyone that has the burden of Mental illness; the universal albatross that embraces all of mankind.
Being depressed, to psychotic breaks; we all face the burden of trying to embrace reality.
Your challenges, and attempts at solutions, while trying to help another person, is inspiring.
We cannot give up on our efforts to provide answers and solutions to mental illnesses.
Comment Written 24-Sep-2024