The Animal Doctor
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Of Love and War Part3"Love Among the Thorns
29 total reviews
Comment from Schalk Jacobs
Sorry for my absence in the past weeks.
Another super chapter that explores how Nate has changed. He has become more vindictive towards love or his understanding of love.
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2013
  |
Sorry for my absence in the past weeks.
Another super chapter that explores how Nate has changed. He has become more vindictive towards love or his understanding of love.
Comment Written 12-Sep-2013
reply by the author on 12-Sep-2013
-
oh don't be so hard on him. Margaret screwed him over. LOL Thanks for the review.
-
Hey, why did you review this one? My latest post is 1.25
-
Because I believe in reading every chapter of a book. As I only missed one, I decided to review it. Member cents don't mean much to me, the review does more.
Comment from PrincessinPurple
I have to say I like the drawing for this chapter. This story is coming along well. I do like the title you have come up with. I read this chapter and I found no errors which need to be corrected.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2013
|
I have to say I like the drawing for this chapter. This story is coming along well. I do like the title you have come up with. I read this chapter and I found no errors which need to be corrected.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2013
-
Thank you PrincessinPurple. I'm glad you liked this chapter.
-
Your welcome!
-
Your welcome!
Comment from writerwish
Pretty aggressive soldier there. Clearly he had deep past feelings for Margaret. That dialogue showed tis and the awkwardness he felt. The horses riding over him was very tension building. Good job.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2013
|
Pretty aggressive soldier there. Clearly he had deep past feelings for Margaret. That dialogue showed tis and the awkwardness he felt. The horses riding over him was very tension building. Good job.
Comment Written 21-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2013
-
Thank you writerwish. The horse thing was a nightmare of his previous ordeal in chapter 7.
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Amahra. Another fine chapter here. Your plot moves smoothly for sure. I do have some suggestions if you don't mind:
"The deadly lost of his" (I think you mean "loss" not "lost" in this context.
And: "He lowered his eyes, looked up and half-smiled. (I don't think "half anything works in writing. I think he either smiled or grinned would be better than "half-smiled."
And: "Her lips were inside of his mouth. This was not the school-boy kisses she had experience before. He kissed her ears, her neck, her throat, her chin...taking her top lip into hisrmouth, then the bottom, then both again and again." (I don't think you mean her lips were inside his mouth? How do you do that? LOL...His Tongue....yes. Also, you have his mouth ran together later in the same sentence, amahra.
Good job, overall. Just needs a bit of polish. Bob
ps. I noted that you have stopped reviewing my work....as in the last two chapters of my book. Are you not into the story or have I done something to offend? Bob
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
 |
Hi, Amahra. Another fine chapter here. Your plot moves smoothly for sure. I do have some suggestions if you don't mind:
"The deadly lost of his" (I think you mean "loss" not "lost" in this context.
And: "He lowered his eyes, looked up and half-smiled. (I don't think "half anything works in writing. I think he either smiled or grinned would be better than "half-smiled."
And: "Her lips were inside of his mouth. This was not the school-boy kisses she had experience before. He kissed her ears, her neck, her throat, her chin...taking her top lip into hisrmouth, then the bottom, then both again and again." (I don't think you mean her lips were inside his mouth? How do you do that? LOL...His Tongue....yes. Also, you have his mouth ran together later in the same sentence, amahra.
Good job, overall. Just needs a bit of polish. Bob
ps. I noted that you have stopped reviewing my work....as in the last two chapters of my book. Are you not into the story or have I done something to offend? Bob
Comment Written 21-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
-
Thank you for reviewing and making suggestions, Bob.
Comment from alexgeorge
It's good to see Nathan is recovering. Oh drat! So close and yet so far. Why, Margaret, why?
Why Nathan! I never knew you had it in you, and Margaret left only the day before!
That was so erotic, and close!
You are an exellent romance writer, amahra, a rare gem.
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
|
It's good to see Nathan is recovering. Oh drat! So close and yet so far. Why, Margaret, why?
Why Nathan! I never knew you had it in you, and Margaret left only the day before!
That was so erotic, and close!
You are an exellent romance writer, amahra, a rare gem.
Comment Written 21-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
-
Thank you alexgeore, I really appreciate your review.
Comment from Auroraboreal800
A new wonderful chapter. Very well written. This is a excellent job of showing the horrors of war and a sensitive man's reaction to it.
I'll be waiting for next chapter, this one is GREAT!
:)
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
|
A new wonderful chapter. Very well written. This is a excellent job of showing the horrors of war and a sensitive man's reaction to it.
I'll be waiting for next chapter, this one is GREAT!
:)
Comment Written 21-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
-
thank you.
Comment from emjaihammond
This chapter certainly takes a new direction. He is clearly feeling better physically at least. I would imagine there are a lot of demons to be flushed out after all he has suffered. I thought you did a good job of showing the young nurse's mixed feelings about what was happening. An interesting chapter.
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
|
This chapter certainly takes a new direction. He is clearly feeling better physically at least. I would imagine there are a lot of demons to be flushed out after all he has suffered. I thought you did a good job of showing the young nurse's mixed feelings about what was happening. An interesting chapter.
Comment Written 21-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 21-Aug-2013
-
Thank you so much for reading and for your sincere comments. Most see him as a bad guy, but you get it. Thank you, again.
Comment from ReaThomas
I like your style and the chapter is very easy to read. My main suggestion would be to double check your dialogue. There are a couple of instances in which you do not take a line break for a change in character dialogue, which makes it confusing to know who is saying what. Otherwise, a pleasure to read.
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
|
I like your style and the chapter is very easy to read. My main suggestion would be to double check your dialogue. There are a couple of instances in which you do not take a line break for a change in character dialogue, which makes it confusing to know who is saying what. Otherwise, a pleasure to read.
Comment Written 20-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
-
Thank you Thomas.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
A great story my friend. This must have been written in times past. Most women don't act like that anymore. Its too bad. I will be looking for the next section of you writing. Thank you
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
|
A great story my friend. This must have been written in times past. Most women don't act like that anymore. Its too bad. I will be looking for the next section of you writing. Thank you
Comment Written 20-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
-
Thank you for your review.
Comment from JM daSilva
Nathan knows what he wants and grabs it in no uncertain terms. Too bad he didn't do the same to Margaret. That's what happens when you put a woman on a pedestal. Loving is good, deifying, not so much. Good job describing everything.
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
|
Nathan knows what he wants and grabs it in no uncertain terms. Too bad he didn't do the same to Margaret. That's what happens when you put a woman on a pedestal. Loving is good, deifying, not so much. Good job describing everything.
Comment Written 20-Aug-2013
reply by the author on 20-Aug-2013
-
Thank you JM.
-
:)