Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

You told your humorous, short tale well in these rhymed couplets in quatrains. You also found the perfect artwork. Best wishes in the contest- Joan

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 24-Apr-2014

Thanks for the encouraging review... you were the only one that found it humorous. cheers

reply by Joan E. on 24-Apr-2014

I'm still chortling- Joan

Comment from Muffins

Excellent

Ooh, you got me in the end. I jerked forward in my seat them remembered this was a horror prompt. This was good. You pulled the reader into a sense of security then wham hit them or in this case ( because they are the #1 targets) the teenager with a terrifying surprise. Please write another prompt in which there is a happy ending! Please!

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 24-Apr-2014

Boo yah...Thanks for the review, a couple people wanted to clear up that face at the window, maybe I will write part 2 , cheers J

Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi Judester

Eeeeek, the man in the windowpane!You have the makings for a sequel poem with the man.

For that matter, it can get scary with a kid and the remote!

Good story. Good Luck in the contest

Cheers
Keep Smilin'... Jax

 Comment Written 23-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 23-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review Jax....I'm smiling, J

Comment from Karen B.

Excellent

Considering that final line, is there a sequel? :) Well written with great rhyming that moves the poem along. Best wishes in the contest!

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review Karen, cheers

Comment from Willowsong

Excellent

Very creepy piece. The ending gave me the image of lightning flashing outside, illuminating the peering face giving me chills. Nicely written.

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review Willowsong cheers

reply by Willowsong on 23-Apr-2014

You're welcome...Cheers! :-)

Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell

Excellent

Well done! This is very cleverly written, just one hundred words, and you have written a story, with fears that every parent dreads, and then brought us out with a smile until your twist in the last line! Excellent contest entry! xsx Sandra

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review, cheers

Comment from Carole Rosa

Excellent

To the author of New Trick, Clever. Very Clever. Your prose within a poem format is surprisingly good, written with only 100 words. The poem is misleading, but with the ending, it even scares me to think about a man looking in the window! Ha. Very good. Carole

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review Carole

Comment from JavaJunkie

Excellent

Yikes super creepy! I have chills. I think this should be a strong contender for the contest. The picture itself is super creepy. Nicely done.

Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the review JavaJunkie, cheers

Comment from Righteous Riter

Excellent

Good use of the aabb rhyme scheme. Good end rhyming. Good perfect rhyming with boom/room. Good alliteration with with/wrath...too/tired...powered/panic...she/slowly...through/the. This piece reminds me of the movie, There's a Strange in the House. Good work.

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the righteous review, cheers

Comment from Leineco

Excellent

Creepy - subtle - itching under the skin!
The terror, in truth, lies cloaked in suspense.
What was that noise?. . . I'm sure it was just my imagination!
There, did you see that light?. . .I'm sure it was just a reflection - some trick of my eyes!
Where did that draft come from?. . .I must not have latched the door right!
Why do I smell copper?. . .Maybe it wa-

Aghhhhh!

Nice write :-)

 Comment Written 22-Apr-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Apr-2014

Thanks for the clever review. Almost an entry in itself, cheers,