Poems
Viewing comments for Chapter 69 "Unvoiced"Assorted poetry
12 total reviews
Comment from Mae 222
From bad language spoken caused heartbreak and tribulations
to the point of breaking up. A picture taped over the mouth doesn't
solve the situation, but fits the words so written perfect. Nice work!
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
   |
From bad language spoken caused heartbreak and tribulations
to the point of breaking up. A picture taped over the mouth doesn't
solve the situation, but fits the words so written perfect. Nice work!
Comment Written 22-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Mae, for reviewing this. Bill
Comment from GoodHearted Woman
Bill, you are GREAT at these. This one is a real winner, I'd say. Could you just please explain to me about the picture? Has someone else put the tape over her mouth or did she do that herself (by just not speaking up). I know this poem is deeper than I go, but if I walk on my tiptoes, I can still breathe. A cacophony is a harsh mixture of bad sounds. If it were just you and she, and she's not talking--where is the cacophony coming from. I know bad things can happen when one partner bottles up their thoughts and anger--is this what you're saying. But it looks pretty and read so easily--(like it's an EASY thing for you to do!!!) Laugh. Should do great. Marcia
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
|
Bill, you are GREAT at these. This one is a real winner, I'd say. Could you just please explain to me about the picture? Has someone else put the tape over her mouth or did she do that herself (by just not speaking up). I know this poem is deeper than I go, but if I walk on my tiptoes, I can still breathe. A cacophony is a harsh mixture of bad sounds. If it were just you and she, and she's not talking--where is the cacophony coming from. I know bad things can happen when one partner bottles up their thoughts and anger--is this what you're saying. But it looks pretty and read so easily--(like it's an EASY thing for you to do!!!) Laugh. Should do great. Marcia
Comment Written 22-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Marcia, for the excellent review. This really speaks to inaction on the part of those who are situated to help. Evil flourishes when good men do nothing. Both the idea of a voice and the cacophony and metaphors for action and global turmoil. The picture used was a random choice to capture the gist of the theme.
-
Oh, well, now I see everything clearly, and you are so right. In the context it was written, it's even more clever. Thanks. Marcia
Comment from foxangie123
I have no idea what the last word means nor have I seen it yet all of the rest of it I thought was great and enjoyable. Conversation is true healing and doing things wrong help us to find the ways that are right if we as people can get from under the weight.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
|
I have no idea what the last word means nor have I seen it yet all of the rest of it I thought was great and enjoyable. Conversation is true healing and doing things wrong help us to find the ways that are right if we as people can get from under the weight.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Angie, for reviewing this. Cacophony, in its regular definition, is a bombardment of sounds that may come from different sources and fill the audio range.
Comment from penelopehart
I'm new to Etheree poetry but interested in reading here that it lends itself to very forceful narrative. The strength and anger grow in your poem, literally as the lines get longer. This 'silent voice' is such a menace, surprisingly.
Your use of black and white visuals is super right.
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
|
I'm new to Etheree poetry but interested in reading here that it lends itself to very forceful narrative. The strength and anger grow in your poem, literally as the lines get longer. This 'silent voice' is such a menace, surprisingly.
Your use of black and white visuals is super right.
Comment Written 22-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Penelope, for your insightful and encouraging review. Bill
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A well-written Etheree. It us better to say how you feel before it is too late. We should not hold back when you love someone tell them. They might feel the same.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2016
|
A well-written Etheree. It us better to say how you feel before it is too late. We should not hold back when you love someone tell them. They might feel the same.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Sandra, for the excellent review. Bill
-
Thank you, Sandra, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from zekeziemann
Very well done and correct in form. I thought the Etheree contest would be very difficult, but you seemed to make it easy although I be it wasn't. Thanks for your service in the Marines.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2016
|
Very well done and correct in form. I thought the Etheree contest would be very difficult, but you seemed to make it easy although I be it wasn't. Thanks for your service in the Marines.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Zeke, for the excellentllent review. Bill
Comment from candyfink
Interesting viewpoint .............. you gave me something to think about....... I thought it was creative and different........ thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2016
|
Interesting viewpoint .............. you gave me something to think about....... I thought it was creative and different........ thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, Candy, for the excellentllent review. Bill
Comment from djeckert
an interesting write about thde question not asked, or the thing not said. I like your last line alluding to the noise of silence. I like too, the growing font . cool! God Blesses
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2016
|
an interesting write about thde question not asked, or the thing not said. I like your last line alluding to the noise of silence. I like too, the growing font . cool! God Blesses
Comment Written 08-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, dj, for the terrific review. Bill
Comment from nomi338
The only way and only time we benefit from your silence is when you remain silent because you have nothing of value or interest to say anyway. The problem with some people is that the only time they want to speak is when they have noting to say that anyone wants to hear.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
|
The only way and only time we benefit from your silence is when you remain silent because you have nothing of value or interest to say anyway. The problem with some people is that the only time they want to speak is when they have noting to say that anyone wants to hear.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, nomi, for this impassioned review. I am pleased to have caused a reaction. Happy day. Bill
-
Thank you for writing that. It gave me an opportunity to say something that's been on my mind for years. Funny thing is I didn't even realize it.
Comment from damommy
As I understand it, there are times when we should be up. Too often, people speak up when they shouldn't. But there a definitely times that it would have saved a lot of heartache and grief.
This is very nicely worded, and I especially like "a silent voice in the cacophony." I can relate to that, because I've had it happen that someone could have spoken up and didn't.
I enjoyed reading this. Thank you. 8-)
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
|
As I understand it, there are times when we should be up. Too often, people speak up when they shouldn't. But there a definitely times that it would have saved a lot of heartache and grief.
This is very nicely worded, and I especially like "a silent voice in the cacophony." I can relate to that, because I've had it happen that someone could have spoken up and didn't.
I enjoyed reading this. Thank you. 8-)
Comment Written 07-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2016
-
Thank you, da, for giving this a look. This is for an ETHEREE contest. I think it's still open. It's free to enter. Happy day.
-
Thank you for the invitation, but I'm not much good except for writing for children. 8-)
-
Thank you for the invitation, but I'm not much good except for writing for children. 8-)