Pantoum Collection
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "The Boobook Owl"Poems written using the pantoum form
118 total reviews
Comment from Pili Pubul
You accomplished a wonderful Pantoum. Love to read it aloud, the repetition gives great rhythm. Excellent imagery about Boobook owl waiting for pray, silent killer. Enjoy reading it. Pili
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
  |
You accomplished a wonderful Pantoum. Love to read it aloud, the repetition gives great rhythm. Excellent imagery about Boobook owl waiting for pray, silent killer. Enjoy reading it. Pili
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Pili, and for your lovely comments. Much appreciated.
-
You very welcome... Pili
Comment from kenni
I like the form and the intensity it allows to build as the verse progresses. The meter is intense as well, as is the excellent abab rhyme, but I am most captivated by the language. I'm sure if I looked hard enough, tried hard enough, I could find some small part of it to correct, but believe me, if there is such a part it sure isn't obvious. kenni
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
I like the form and the intensity it allows to build as the verse progresses. The meter is intense as well, as is the excellent abab rhyme, but I am most captivated by the language. I'm sure if I looked hard enough, tried hard enough, I could find some small part of it to correct, but believe me, if there is such a part it sure isn't obvious. kenni
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Kenni, and for your very kind comments. Much appreciated.
Comment from tbacha58
A wraith with staring hooded eye
suggested in the ghost gum tree,
her talons piercing death's small cry,
the Boobook owl kills silently.
This poem and the picture for me , its a MasterPiece. You broke a record in poetry sir.I read you were a teacher, you must have been
so proud from all your students. They also should have been extremely proud of you. Beautiful poem. Bless you Terry
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
A wraith with staring hooded eye
suggested in the ghost gum tree,
her talons piercing death's small cry,
the Boobook owl kills silently.
This poem and the picture for me , its a MasterPiece. You broke a record in poetry sir.I read you were a teacher, you must have been
so proud from all your students. They also should have been extremely proud of you. Beautiful poem. Bless you Terry
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Terry, and for your high praise. Much appreciated.
Comment from ragamuffin
This was a very enjoyable piece. It is cleverly written and the description makes it so easy to see in the mind's eye the details of the animal and of the hunt. It's nice to learn a bit from "reading for pleasure" pieces as well.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
This was a very enjoyable piece. It is cleverly written and the description makes it so easy to see in the mind's eye the details of the animal and of the hunt. It's nice to learn a bit from "reading for pleasure" pieces as well.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Ragamuffin, and for your kind comments. Much appreciated.
Comment from christopherjl
I'm not sure if it was intentional or not but there was some effective use of alliteration in the first stanza that I really liked. Well written on your part. I have nothing to improve upon the piece! Well done!
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
I'm not sure if it was intentional or not but there was some effective use of alliteration in the first stanza that I really liked. Well written on your part. I have nothing to improve upon the piece! Well done!
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Christopher, and for your kind comments. Much appreciated. Yes, the alliteration was intentional and thank you for your feedback about it. I'm glad it worked for you!
Comment from Poetofheart2013
I really like this poem about a owl it very good and wrote it really well. I love owls too where I live I hear owls too. Good Job
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
I really like this poem about a owl it very good and wrote it really well. I love owls too where I live I hear owls too. Good Job
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Poetofheart2013, and for your comments. Much appreciated.
Comment from JMUwrites
I absolutely love this pantoum Tony, you did a marvelous job with what I consider to be one of poetry's toughest writes!
Plus, the Boobook is obviously an incredible little animal, and the words you'd chosen to describe its activity served to clarify concisely what it's all about! You're fortunate to have such creatures to admire, here in Wisconsin we have Great White Owls, Horned Owls and Barn Owls...most of which are quite large, and are vicious (though silent as well) killers.
Thanks for sharing this amazing piece of poetry, off I go now to read it yet again as I'd be happy to learn the pantoum style by someone who wrote one so very well!
All the best to you, with warm regards...
JMU
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
 |
I absolutely love this pantoum Tony, you did a marvelous job with what I consider to be one of poetry's toughest writes!
Plus, the Boobook is obviously an incredible little animal, and the words you'd chosen to describe its activity served to clarify concisely what it's all about! You're fortunate to have such creatures to admire, here in Wisconsin we have Great White Owls, Horned Owls and Barn Owls...most of which are quite large, and are vicious (though silent as well) killers.
Thanks for sharing this amazing piece of poetry, off I go now to read it yet again as I'd be happy to learn the pantoum style by someone who wrote one so very well!
All the best to you, with warm regards...
JMU
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your most interesting review, JMU, and for your very kind comments. Much appreciated. The boobook is a lovely bird and it has a wonderfully melancholy cry on two distinct notes - hence the name. Some people also call it the mopoke or the mawpawk.
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
'The B------ Owl' is an extremely well-written and wonderfully descriptive piece. This talented poet has with craft and skill, told it as it is. It was a pleasure to both read and review a work of this standard.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
|
'The B------ Owl' is an extremely well-written and wonderfully descriptive piece. This talented poet has with craft and skill, told it as it is. It was a pleasure to both read and review a work of this standard.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2013
-
Many thanks for your review, Duchess, and for your very kind comments. Much appreciated.
-
tfawcus, you're more than welcome.
With my best wishes, the Duchess
Comment from Eternal Muse
Wow - I was awestruck with your owl with blue eyes! A perfect Pantoum, etched to perfection; visuals so great I can almost see that owl and her unhappy prey.
Loved these lines:
her shadowed silver silhouette
stays poised. She waits for swaying sedge,
her whisper close to flight and yet
her prey, alert at water's edge,
I once penned a sonnet myself titled "Owl". They are such amazing creatures, with some mystery to them.
A very impressive composition.
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
|
Wow - I was awestruck with your owl with blue eyes! A perfect Pantoum, etched to perfection; visuals so great I can almost see that owl and her unhappy prey.
Loved these lines:
her shadowed silver silhouette
stays poised. She waits for swaying sedge,
her whisper close to flight and yet
her prey, alert at water's edge,
I once penned a sonnet myself titled "Owl". They are such amazing creatures, with some mystery to them.
A very impressive composition.
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
-
Thank you so much for this review, Yeltel. It is my first attempt at this form of poem and I am delighted that you thought highly enough of it to rate it with 6 stars. I agree with you about owls. There is something very special about them!
-
Yes, it was greatly written. Not only you delivered a perfect pantoum, but you introduced us to this adorable creature. This owl won my heart.
The only suggestion I can make is the color scheme. You may want to try the scheme to match the owl's coloring. Here I can suggest the following: for the font, try Cornsilk, for text color Van Dyck Brown. Experiment it - you'll see! I think I used those colors on my "Owl" sonnet. Here is the link to it:
http://fanstory.com/displaystory.jsp?hd=1&id=561932&userid=154806&tf=0
-
Thanks for the suggestion! Love your sonnet! Eyes of jade and dreams that are colour-blind and the tapestry of feathers! I'll have a look at a 'shades of brown' colour scheme. It works really well for your sonnet. I was aiming to achieve a colour scheme that suggested the silver of a moonlit night and had intended a picture of an owl at night, but that was the only Boobook I could find on FanArtReview!
-
I played around with the colours for a bit! Didn't think the browns suited the night-time feel of the poem at all! Have gone back to something like the colour scheme I originally had. What I really need is a picture that goes with the colour scheme!
-
I think I've got it at last, after much fiddling!
-
An interesting color scheme, but I liked the single space better.
-
Not sure how the double spacing crept in! I had a bit of trouble with the text editor at one stage! Back to single spacing now!
Comment from dmt1967
The picture is so cute how can something so cute be so ruthless that's nature I guess very well written I loved it thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
|
The picture is so cute how can something so cute be so ruthless that's nature I guess very well written I loved it thank you for sharing
Comment Written 17-Oct-2013
reply by the author on 17-Oct-2013
-
Dear dmt1967, I hunted high and low for an evil-looking photo. It seems that photographers only take snapshots of owls on their best behaviour! Thanks for the review and the compliments!