Four Horse Island
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Claustrophobia"Marooned on an island with 4 horses and a goat
26 total reviews
Comment from Spitfire
An excellent job of making the reader feel the panic of the protagonist. Clues give rise to what's happening-- a storm at sea that tossed the ship mercilessly. I imagine claustrophobia will play a big part in the novella.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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An excellent job of making the reader feel the panic of the protagonist. Clues give rise to what's happening-- a storm at sea that tossed the ship mercilessly. I imagine claustrophobia will play a big part in the novella.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi Shari,
Thank you for the six stars and the kind comments about the writing. I'm glad you could relate to the protagonist. Yes, closed-in places may not be this character's favorite.
Debi
Comment from damommy
WOW! I was right there with you as the tension mounted. Good way you did that. You had me wondering if escape was possible. And it was! I'd like to hear more of this story.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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WOW! I was right there with you as the tension mounted. Good way you did that. You had me wondering if escape was possible. And it was! I'd like to hear more of this story.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi damommy,
Thank you for the super comments and the six stars to go with them. It is music to my ears to hear you want to read more. I appreciate the encouragement.
Debi
Comment from royowen
This is most imaginative Debi, you are a most imaginative writer, and this fine episode confirms that, I think I've been your fan for quite sometime now and I always enjoy your work, and this is no exception, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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This is most imaginative Debi, you are a most imaginative writer, and this fine episode confirms that, I think I've been your fan for quite sometime now and I always enjoy your work, and this is no exception, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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Hi Roy,
You say the kindest things. I'm glad you enjoyed this chapter. I appreciate the continued support and encouragement you give.
Have a wonderful day.
Debi
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Most welcome
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Good image for your story, Debi.
-You did a good job of personifying claustrophobia,
and also create a great deal of suspense as ti
where the character was and was he/she really
covered in debris.
-You do a good job with all of the emotions
this person is feeling, too.
- The imagery is very good, like
"willing my body to move in the wave-like motion of a caterpillar, inch by aggravating, tortuous inch."
-A good ending, as well.
-I'll never think of claustrophobia the same way again!
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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-Good image for your story, Debi.
-You did a good job of personifying claustrophobia,
and also create a great deal of suspense as ti
where the character was and was he/she really
covered in debris.
-You do a good job with all of the emotions
this person is feeling, too.
- The imagery is very good, like
"willing my body to move in the wave-like motion of a caterpillar, inch by aggravating, tortuous inch."
-A good ending, as well.
-I'll never think of claustrophobia the same way again!
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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Hi Pam,
Thank you for the detailed review. Thanks for pointing out the part you liked and mentioning the ending.
Just taking your advice and posting something to keep my name out there while I talk to Piper about his future.
I appreciate that final comment about claustrophobia. Hehe.
Thanks for dropping by. Have a wonderful day.
Debi
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You are very welcome, Debi, and I appreciate your reply. I hope Piper shares some good insights with you. You have a g great day, too. Right now it is raining, but it is supposed to clear up.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is an excellent beginning of a book. I can't wait for you to post more. I will be looking forward to reading more. Please hurry to post more. I couldn't find any way to make this post any better.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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This is an excellent beginning of a book. I can't wait for you to post more. I will be looking forward to reading more. Please hurry to post more. I couldn't find any way to make this post any better.
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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What a nice thing to say. I appreciate the encouragement. More to come soon.
Debi
Comment from nancy_e_davis
I don't know if I want to give you a one or a six! LOL Being someone on oxygen 24/7 it really made me gasp for air because I know what it is like to need air desperately. Two or three times I have awakened gasping for air because I have lost my canula somewhere in bed during the night.
(For those who do not know a canula is, it is the thingy in your nose that delivers the oxygen.)
Excellent cliff hanger debi. Can't wait for more of the story. Nancy:)
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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I don't know if I want to give you a one or a six! LOL Being someone on oxygen 24/7 it really made me gasp for air because I know what it is like to need air desperately. Two or three times I have awakened gasping for air because I have lost my canula somewhere in bed during the night.
(For those who do not know a canula is, it is the thingy in your nose that delivers the oxygen.)
Excellent cliff hanger debi. Can't wait for more of the story. Nancy:)
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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Hi Nancy,
You certainly would have had my attention with a one, but I appreciate you decided on the six. Thank you so much.
Sorry to cause you distress. Thank you for the note about what a canula is. I didn't know what is was called.
Thank you for the kind comments about wanting more.
Debi
Comment from JT traveller
Your description of claustrophobia is so vivid, so tangible. A great piece of writing.
Although not a sufferer myself, the imagery you created made my heart beat faster.
Great job. Jacqueline
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Your description of claustrophobia is so vivid, so tangible. A great piece of writing.
Although not a sufferer myself, the imagery you created made my heart beat faster.
Great job. Jacqueline
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi Jacqueline,
Thank you for the kind comments about the writing. I appreciate the encouragement.
Debi
Comment from jmdg1954
I felt every wave of emotion, anxiety, fright, tension, apprehension, breathing your character felt.
Your method of short, and even one word sentences was perfect to affirm the reader as part of the story.
I can't wait for the next chapter. I have a number of questions I need answered!
Cheers to your excellent writing!
John
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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I felt every wave of emotion, anxiety, fright, tension, apprehension, breathing your character felt.
Your method of short, and even one word sentences was perfect to affirm the reader as part of the story.
I can't wait for the next chapter. I have a number of questions I need answered!
Cheers to your excellent writing!
John
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi John,
Wow. This is an encouraging review. Not only the six stars, but the kind comments abou thow th writing made you feel and that you are excited for the next chapter. Thank you so much.
Debi
Comment from Wendy G
You described the claustrophobia very well with the associated feelings of panic and terror. Short, fast sentences emphasized the drama. Being shipwrecked is bad enough but to be trapped as well - very frightening. Are there other survivors? Well written.
Wendy
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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You described the claustrophobia very well with the associated feelings of panic and terror. Short, fast sentences emphasized the drama. Being shipwrecked is bad enough but to be trapped as well - very frightening. Are there other survivors? Well written.
Wendy
Comment Written 18-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2023
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Hi Wendy,
Thank you for the analysis and encouraging comments. I appreciate you stopping by to read and review. Excellent question you ask.
Debi
Comment from GWHARGIS
I have a confession. I'm not claustrophobic but I'm deathly afraid of water. I think I held my breath through most of this. I could feel the panic. Where was everyone else? What caused her to be trapped? I'm ready for more. Gretchen
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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I have a confession. I'm not claustrophobic but I'm deathly afraid of water. I think I held my breath through most of this. I could feel the panic. Where was everyone else? What caused her to be trapped? I'm ready for more. Gretchen
Comment Written 17-Jul-2023
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2023
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Hi Gretchen,
Thank you for the confession and the reaction to the chapter. What a nice thing to say--that you are ready for me.
Have a wonderful day.
Debi