Comment from Sugarray77

Excellent

Hi Gypsy. Well done on this stunning verse that uses color as a descriptive tool.. as you present each stanza with variations of color, you are also shading the moods. Very clever. I enjoyed it!!

Melissa

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis

Comment from royowen

Excellent

An excellent poem, of all your poetry I find the most authentic,(although they all are really) is how you move with ease about the intimate ones, whereas I feel decidedly uncomfortable with, so well done you. Well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2023

Thank you very much for your excellent review and kind words.

Gypsy
"Poetry heals the wounds inflicted by reason" -- Novalis

reply by royowen on 18-Aug-2023

Well done

Comment from Katie Mae Dead

Excellent

Outstanding Gypsy! I think this would make a grand entry into the free verse contest coming up.
This is my favorite part...

The wind sighs and whispers
your name
along with dried drifting leaves
carrying
my headed-to-fail
hope to find you

Love :dried drifting leaves" and "headed-to-fail hope"
Great all the way around

Katiemaedead

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2023

Thank you very much, my friend. I appreciate your kind words and wonderful review.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from AP Apgar

Excellent

touch, hearing, taste, sight- smell - I like your free verse challenge about the senses - Good picture presentation and flow - touched the water - heard the wind - tasted cranberry's - saw the dusk - smelled the mums -you nailed it! - Good job, only thing I might suggest - maybe "headed to fail" - destined to fail? See what you think - Good challenge - AP

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 18-Aug-2023

Thank you very much, my friend. I appreciate your kind words and wonderful review.

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Mintybee

Exceptional

This was an amazing poem, full of sensory detail and imagery. This poem had deep emotions and unfulfilled longing. The colours you used worked with the mood of the poem. The chrysanthemums at the end was the perfect visual ending.
Mintybee

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 17-Aug-2023

Thank you very much, mintybee. I appreciate your exceptional six stars review and kind words!

Gypsy hugs

Comment from Douglas Goff

Excellent

Oh weee this one had some steam on it and it made me hungry.

My favorite stanza seemed so final:
The purple dusk is beautiful
and a last futile try to cheer me up
before the impending sunset
says goodbye

Very good!!!!

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 17-Aug-2023

Thank you very much, Douglas

gypsy

Comment from JSD

Excellent

Ah. DH Lawrence. Short story: 'Odour of Chrysanthemums.' I studied it at school. This is a lovely poem. I like its continuous lines, sweeping the reader on with language. Excellent. Don't be sad. You're an excellent poet.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 17-Aug-2023

Thank you very much, John

gypsy

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

zigzaging <-- zigzagGing

LOVED these lines!
my hand tests the water
the wind sighs
and whispers your name
the mums smell like death

great five senses poem
you described them all nicely

cool colours, too

thank you for sharing
shelley :)



This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 17-Aug-2023

---

reply by the author on 17-Aug-2023

thank you, shelley :)