Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

Poor Mrs D, what an awful scene you came across here Lea and she could have been dead and then you would be calling the Police to report a murder! This woman is foolish to stay with this man and he will kill her one day. You left us with the possibility of another assault here Lea.

I hope you find another suitable place to rent Lea and I wish you luck with that. You can't live with rats and cockroaches as it is unhealthy.

Good luck. Another fine chapter in your story of abuse and destruction in your early years, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 17-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023

Thank you Dolly! I continue to wage my war with the rats and look for a suitable. However all things come as they should I will have faith in that. Thank you for your wonderful and in sightful. Review always have the best things to say thank you. My friend and I hope you are having a wonderful evening and that you have the best holiday ever!

Comment from Lisasview

Excellent

Good morning dear Lea,
I think your story is quite good... Edge of ones seat...with all the suspense!!!
I went a bit crazy editing this morning (because I have a bit of time as I am recovering from a cold.
The errors are not much... I feel that your writing has really improved....
These are just grammar errors...nothing to do with your story...

Still disgusted in the rodents and bugs.
Instead of IN the I think you might want to use the word WITH

plugs are all than can done for now.
Instead of THAN I think you meant THAT

I will battle the cockroaches for ground.
Here Lea did you mean for GOOD?
Looking around the house was demolished.
This sentence need to be reworked...
Like As I looked around I saw that the house was demolished...or???

I followed the trail of blood but from the hallway through the living room
Not sure about the BUT in this sentence?
Twisted make it worse
Here I think you need to work on this sentence.

her head so I grabbed detail ice and brought it out.
Not sure what you meant by DETAIL???

Place it upon her head
I think you meant PLACED not PLACE

and in your notes at the bottom...

None one can take that.
NO ONE can take


All my best to you,
Lisa

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 Comment Written 17-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023

Thank you, Lisa, I've always. I appreciate your input and your suggestions for edit. They are like gold to me. And I need them to grow as a writer. So thank you for contributing to that! Thank you for your time and your kind writing too. And I hope you have a most wonderful holiday filled with love and joy!

reply by Lisasview on 20-Dec-2023

I enjoy helping you dear Lea... Being a good reviewer is important to me. So glad to be of help.
Lisa

Comment from royowen

Excellent

I can't believe how evil some men are, this story is a shocker, Mrs D, is suffering from some awful injury here, I wonder what the ambos will do, I think they might call the police. There were four woman who were murdered by their husbands or partners, well done Lea, you must possess a lot of courage, blessings Roy

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 Comment Written 17-Dec-2023

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reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023

Well, I don't know about courage so much. I always felt scared. It was actually a do-or-die no choices. Thank you Roy again for reading. I appreciate this so much. Appreciate also your complete crystal. Clear clarity of the situation and for your time especially I am thankful! I hope you have the best christmas holiday filled with joy and love!

reply by royowen on 20-Dec-2023

If you weren?t afraid it wouldn?t be courage Lea, betting against odds.