My Scrapbook - Rebirth
Not all who wander are lost -- J.R.R. Tolkien69 total reviews
Comment from forestport12
This story is threaded nicely, without dragging the reader into self loathing, but inspiring a reader to see the big picture, look in the mirror of ones own life.
At this point it hardly seems valid for me to rate a work of art reviewed living in its glory. I feel unworthy, like the Cowardly Lion falling all over himself at the great voice projected in front of him.
I do have one question? IF 'm absurd to say it , feel free to shrink me further from this curtain of examination. I noticed a few cliche's that jumped at me. And with such amazing word power on display I would have thought another phrase of description could have been used? "Walk like a duck?" "...becoming an empty shell?"
Powerful writing. And I only wish I had someone who would encourage me to write. I sent my mother one of my reviews, and she pretended that I never sent he a letter at all. Ah, but look what you have done, the best a writer can do. You have strummed the chords of our hearts, and that is why we sing your praises. Amen.
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2010
  |
This story is threaded nicely, without dragging the reader into self loathing, but inspiring a reader to see the big picture, look in the mirror of ones own life.
At this point it hardly seems valid for me to rate a work of art reviewed living in its glory. I feel unworthy, like the Cowardly Lion falling all over himself at the great voice projected in front of him.
I do have one question? IF 'm absurd to say it , feel free to shrink me further from this curtain of examination. I noticed a few cliche's that jumped at me. And with such amazing word power on display I would have thought another phrase of description could have been used? "Walk like a duck?" "...becoming an empty shell?"
Powerful writing. And I only wish I had someone who would encourage me to write. I sent my mother one of my reviews, and she pretended that I never sent he a letter at all. Ah, but look what you have done, the best a writer can do. You have strummed the chords of our hearts, and that is why we sing your praises. Amen.
Comment Written 04-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jul-2010
-
Thank you so much for your generous review. My reference to walking like a duck is from a doctor telling me to do precisely that to avoid falling when walking on the dangerous sidewalks down here. I agree with your comment about using the expression "empty shell", it is over used and I can go back over this and find something more original and appropriate. Never apologize for offering valid comments, this is what I am here on FS for. I always appreciate honest reviews and enthusiastically welcome constructive criticism. I sincerely appreciate it.
Comment from Solrac
With her narrative gifts and vivid prose--as free, thank God, of literary posturing as it is of other camouflaging writing, Smurphgirl masterfully chronicles a moment of her life. But what elevates SCRAPBOOKING WITHOUT GLUE out of its particular time and place are the author's meditations on her minds and emotions and those of the people with whom she has shared these moments.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
 |
With her narrative gifts and vivid prose--as free, thank God, of literary posturing as it is of other camouflaging writing, Smurphgirl masterfully chronicles a moment of her life. But what elevates SCRAPBOOKING WITHOUT GLUE out of its particular time and place are the author's meditations on her minds and emotions and those of the people with whom she has shared these moments.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
Thank you so much for your enthusiastic and positive review of this essay. I am honored you felt it deserved six stars. I sincerely appreciate it.
-
I would love to invite you to check www.999steps.com and let me know what do you think,
Solrac
-
I am quite impressed with the site. It really pulls the reader into the story and definitely makes them want to know more. Aside from the site, how are you marketing this? How are you drawing people to the site? I have found that getting the word out about your book to be the hardest part of the whole process. The publishing world is a scary place and to be honest I can only describe it as literally a dog eat dog environment. But what choice does a writer have other than to self-publish which has its own downside.
-
Thank you for your absolutely fabulous words. I had a big fight with the publisher because they wanted me to re-write some chapters and degenerate the story. I finaly told the good by and No-Thanks. Incredibble as it sounds, the same week I cut loose the old publisher I got a fabulous offer to publish Three BOOKs and I am working with them now. The book will be out sometimes the first quarter of next year, but will include fabulous ilustrations. I am not marketing hard yet. The website is out now so it let the internet do the job of indexing which, when doing right takes months. Once the launching time approaches I will go all the way in marketing.
Once again, Smurphgirl a million thank yous for checking the site and for your encouraging words.
I'll keep you posted,
olrac
Comment from Xylok
wow, totally emotionally riveting all the way through. what a fantastic post! i don't choke up often, really, one of those slightly insecure male types who spent far too much time idolizing the Fonz, Elvis, James Dean, cool y'know, like Paul Newman cool right, but this one got me in a couple spots, and most efficaciously in the way it all played out, so beautiful an ending to so difficult a tale to endure...and none too soon. Writes like this bear testimony to the wonder of life and the workings of its source, creator, spark, God, whatever as art.
i just saw how highly you are ranked as an author, wowza, lol, awesome for you! i see why though, cuz you're also great with grammar and sentence structure and all that as well.
your scrapbook sounds like a miracle in progress to me and I smile at the thought of the evolution that it yet has in store. love how you broke into that awesome poem, loved the form of the poem, the truth value shining through, the sad to happy momentum from such depths to such heights...an extremist's read for certain. the summation of the vast time expanse covered too leaves the reader with a comprehensive view of it all.
touching, well written, very well done.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
|
wow, totally emotionally riveting all the way through. what a fantastic post! i don't choke up often, really, one of those slightly insecure male types who spent far too much time idolizing the Fonz, Elvis, James Dean, cool y'know, like Paul Newman cool right, but this one got me in a couple spots, and most efficaciously in the way it all played out, so beautiful an ending to so difficult a tale to endure...and none too soon. Writes like this bear testimony to the wonder of life and the workings of its source, creator, spark, God, whatever as art.
i just saw how highly you are ranked as an author, wowza, lol, awesome for you! i see why though, cuz you're also great with grammar and sentence structure and all that as well.
your scrapbook sounds like a miracle in progress to me and I smile at the thought of the evolution that it yet has in store. love how you broke into that awesome poem, loved the form of the poem, the truth value shining through, the sad to happy momentum from such depths to such heights...an extremist's read for certain. the summation of the vast time expanse covered too leaves the reader with a comprehensive view of it all.
touching, well written, very well done.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
I am thrilled you liked this one. As I mentioned earlier, I tend to lean toward the dark side of life but also wanted to show the reader that there is always hope. I am sincerely pleased you enjoyed this and thank you very much for your enthusiastic review.
Comment from Ann Smith
This is a beautiful story of how love overcomes many hurts and heartaches. It is a shame that you only had three years, but you probably lived a life time in those three years. Thank you for sharing your story, as your mom said, it will help others who face this pain. Good luck with the contest. ann
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
|
This is a beautiful story of how love overcomes many hurts and heartaches. It is a shame that you only had three years, but you probably lived a life time in those three years. Thank you for sharing your story, as your mom said, it will help others who face this pain. Good luck with the contest. ann
Comment Written 01-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
Thank you very much for your positive review and kind words. I sincerely appreciate it.
-
You are welcome. ann
Comment from findingmyroom
Congratulations on gaining the ultimate personal strength: the ability to move past hurts into your own fulfillment. I enjoyed your piece tremendously and applaud your courage in sharing.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
|
Congratulations on gaining the ultimate personal strength: the ability to move past hurts into your own fulfillment. I enjoyed your piece tremendously and applaud your courage in sharing.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
Thank you so much for your generous and positive review. I sincerely appreciate it.
Comment from BrownEyed
Inspiring piece, Sasha. Your story touched me deeply, an I sat thinking for a few next minutes that how could a father do it? Not that I am hearing it for the first time--Oprah has featured many similar cases--but still, reading from the one who went through it first-hand is something different. I am glad you were "re-born". My best wishes.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
|
Inspiring piece, Sasha. Your story touched me deeply, an I sat thinking for a few next minutes that how could a father do it? Not that I am hearing it for the first time--Oprah has featured many similar cases--but still, reading from the one who went through it first-hand is something different. I am glad you were "re-born". My best wishes.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
The answer to your question is that there is no answer that would explain or justify such behavior. I am fortunate to be one of the few who survived and can now look at the world with a smile on my face and joy in my heart. So many are less fortunate. Thank you so very much for your kind and sympathetic review.
Comment from Amfunny
An excellent story. Beautifully written. At first it seemed to be a sad story, but in the end it was a happy story. Well written, too.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
|
An excellent story. Beautifully written. At first it seemed to be a sad story, but in the end it was a happy story. Well written, too.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2010
-
thank you so very much for your wonderful 6 stars. Yes it began as a sad story but came full circle and I can now say life is good and I am happy. As I said in my story, what more could I possible ask for.
Comment from thrufire
First of all, thank you for being willing to share your story. Sometimes that can be so difficult to do. It's hard to trust that our readers will appreciate or understand or not judge.
If I were editing this piece, I would encourage you to start it not where you did, but with "I did finally put together a scrapbook of my life, but it does not start with my birth..." This would have been a better hook to get me immediately interested in your story, because it so unusual that someone would start a scrapbook with a "birth" of a different kind than the natural one.
You also have some mixed punctuation: some periods and commas inside quotation marks, some outside. In American English, the commas and periods always go inside. I'm not sure if these are just typos, or if you didn't know what to do with them. But either way, you weren't consistent throughout the piece.
Anyhow, you kept a close personal tone to this writing, and that also makes it interesting, aside from the subject matter. I like reading people's stories because we all come from different places, backgrounds, and such. When people are willing to share themselves, I think we can learn from each other. So thanks for being willing to share yourself.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2010
 |
First of all, thank you for being willing to share your story. Sometimes that can be so difficult to do. It's hard to trust that our readers will appreciate or understand or not judge.
If I were editing this piece, I would encourage you to start it not where you did, but with "I did finally put together a scrapbook of my life, but it does not start with my birth..." This would have been a better hook to get me immediately interested in your story, because it so unusual that someone would start a scrapbook with a "birth" of a different kind than the natural one.
You also have some mixed punctuation: some periods and commas inside quotation marks, some outside. In American English, the commas and periods always go inside. I'm not sure if these are just typos, or if you didn't know what to do with them. But either way, you weren't consistent throughout the piece.
Anyhow, you kept a close personal tone to this writing, and that also makes it interesting, aside from the subject matter. I like reading people's stories because we all come from different places, backgrounds, and such. When people are willing to share themselves, I think we can learn from each other. So thanks for being willing to share yourself.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2010
-
Thank you for your helpful suggestions. I sincerely appreciate them.
Comment from Nicky B
A rebirth is an essential part of redemption and hope for the now and the future. Once the haunted past has been faced and expunged the true light of who you are is revealed and it can happen at any time in your life. An honest and inspiring piece my friend. Take care. Nick.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2010
|
A rebirth is an essential part of redemption and hope for the now and the future. Once the haunted past has been faced and expunged the true light of who you are is revealed and it can happen at any time in your life. An honest and inspiring piece my friend. Take care. Nick.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2010
-
Thank you very much. I am pleased you liked this one.
Comment from Krugerrand
From great struggle and horror comes strength and beauty. You've proven that.
When (you?) became ill, it broke my heart...
A wonderfully uplifting story, and I thank you for sharing openly with honesty and courage.
Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2010
|
From great struggle and horror comes strength and beauty. You've proven that.
When (you?) became ill, it broke my heart...
A wonderfully uplifting story, and I thank you for sharing openly with honesty and courage.
Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 29-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2010
-
thank you so much for your generous review and for catching the spag.