Final Reckoning
5-7-5 contest entry Bye Bye Blackbird19 total reviews
Comment from Leineco
borne on eagle's wings
deemed too heavy I'm thrown free
justice waits below
Ahhh. . .the dark side of senryu! One can't help but make the
connection between eagle's wings and angel's wings, and the
weight of black deeds causing ejection on heaven bound flight :-)
nicely done :-)
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borne on eagle's wings
deemed too heavy I'm thrown free
justice waits below
Ahhh. . .the dark side of senryu! One can't help but make the
connection between eagle's wings and angel's wings, and the
weight of black deeds causing ejection on heaven bound flight :-)
nicely done :-)
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from harmony13
Excellent contest entry! The first two lines of this poem flowed and connected well. The last line says it all. The artwork is perfect and enhances the read.
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Excellent contest entry! The first two lines of this poem flowed and connected well. The last line says it all. The artwork is perfect and enhances the read.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from ProjectBluebook
Nice entry, like the black backdrop and cander. Well done, it meets the requirements. Wish you luck in the contest--mate! Justice waits below--makes me snicker in me knickers.
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Nice entry, like the black backdrop and cander. Well done, it meets the requirements. Wish you luck in the contest--mate! Justice waits below--makes me snicker in me knickers.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from barleygirl
The construction & message in your poem is original & well-conveyed. I'm a little put off by the tone of judgment in your author's notes. Hopefully the eagle is God doing the deciding. Thanks for sharing.
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The construction & message in your poem is original & well-conveyed. I'm a little put off by the tone of judgment in your author's notes. Hopefully the eagle is God doing the deciding. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from Shirley E Kennedy
Ah, yes- justice always seems to be lurking for dark and lost souls.
I like the imagery within your written words and the effectiveness of the complementary image to add depth to your meaning.
A good image choice and thoughtful author's notes.
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Ah, yes- justice always seems to be lurking for dark and lost souls.
I like the imagery within your written words and the effectiveness of the complementary image to add depth to your meaning.
A good image choice and thoughtful author's notes.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from Karen B.
Great 5-7-5, it tells a story and makes a strong statement in those few syllables. Nicely done. Good luck in the contest!
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Great 5-7-5, it tells a story and makes a strong statement in those few syllables. Nicely done. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from ragamuffin
Your author's notes- that's an interesting thought. The poem does has a sense of freedom to it in the first two lines, but the last line runs along the lines of running at high speed into a brick wall; more than a rude awakening. Quite the powerful write. Very thought provoking. I kind of figure that those not heading to Heaven will likely in some way lose their individuality. Can you imagine that instant of realization of not going to Heaven, whatever Heaven exactly is? I suspect it's similar to the emotion that caused "that look" on my mom's face when she realized she had lung cancer, which did kill her in less than 2 years from that time. Sorry for rattling on.
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Your author's notes- that's an interesting thought. The poem does has a sense of freedom to it in the first two lines, but the last line runs along the lines of running at high speed into a brick wall; more than a rude awakening. Quite the powerful write. Very thought provoking. I kind of figure that those not heading to Heaven will likely in some way lose their individuality. Can you imagine that instant of realization of not going to Heaven, whatever Heaven exactly is? I suspect it's similar to the emotion that caused "that look" on my mom's face when she realized she had lung cancer, which did kill her in less than 2 years from that time. Sorry for rattling on.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
One of the best of these i have ever read. A spot on and original twist on such a cliched theme. Haunting reflection and chilling realization when the reality of it hits home. Oh...meets the prompt too!! Has my vote. NG
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One of the best of these i have ever read. A spot on and original twist on such a cliched theme. Haunting reflection and chilling realization when the reality of it hits home. Oh...meets the prompt too!! Has my vote. NG
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014
Comment from Jackarrie
borne on eagle's wings
deemed too heavy I'm thrown free
justice waits below
A good entry for the prompt, all the syllables are correct, good luck in the contest. Mary
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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borne on eagle's wings
deemed too heavy I'm thrown free
justice waits below
A good entry for the prompt, all the syllables are correct, good luck in the contest. Mary
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Mar-2014