The Bard of Bel Air
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Flies, Amazons & Ghostwriters"A homeless man sees more than people realize.
16 total reviews
Comment from nelliesellie
The bard knows much more that he is saying. He is also saying a lot but it is up to the detective to translate. The guy could have been killed because he was involve in white collar crime. He could have also been killed because of his cruelty to a member of the family, or a member of the family was just tired of waiting for the riches, The detective has to ferret out motives first.
  |
The bard knows much more that he is saying. He is also saying a lot but it is up to the detective to translate. The guy could have been killed because he was involve in white collar crime. He could have also been killed because of his cruelty to a member of the family, or a member of the family was just tired of waiting for the riches, The detective has to ferret out motives first.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
Comment from Nosha17
Sorry, I am not good on crime and mystery (even though I love Sherlock Holmes!)so not much to offer in way of suggestions for your story. It is really a great story, and the added character of the Bard allows your detective to get inside information. Great narrative and descriptions. Maybe, you could have Lucy bluster her way in there to talk to these sleazy conspirators. Enjoyable as always. Faye
|
Sorry, I am not good on crime and mystery (even though I love Sherlock Holmes!)so not much to offer in way of suggestions for your story. It is really a great story, and the added character of the Bard allows your detective to get inside information. Great narrative and descriptions. Maybe, you could have Lucy bluster her way in there to talk to these sleazy conspirators. Enjoyable as always. Faye
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
Perfect angles here. Undercover is the way to go. You don't want to undermine The Bard as a character by making him too reliable. He is perfect like this. If you pay attention he will give you just enough to send you looking in the right direction. You don't want him to be able to help too much. Great poetry!!! Bard has awesome diatribes here. NG
 |
Perfect angles here. Undercover is the way to go. You don't want to undermine The Bard as a character by making him too reliable. He is perfect like this. If you pay attention he will give you just enough to send you looking in the right direction. You don't want him to be able to help too much. Great poetry!!! Bard has awesome diatribes here. NG
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
You mean it wasn't the butler who did it? Shocking! LOL! C'mon, it has to be Junior or his wife if he has one.., does he? I don't recall one mentioned. He's the one who benefitted. Does he know about the REAL eldest child? If he did, he'd have had her murdered long ago.
|
You mean it wasn't the butler who did it? Shocking! LOL! C'mon, it has to be Junior or his wife if he has one.., does he? I don't recall one mentioned. He's the one who benefitted. Does he know about the REAL eldest child? If he did, he'd have had her murdered long ago.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
Comment from seaglass
"The Bel Air Bunny Ears Rapist"??? This cracked me up not to mention a really weird mental picture that i quickly purged from my mind. LOL
Sounds great and I love the idea of undercover. Will the Amazon dress up like a man?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
"The Bel Air Bunny Ears Rapist"??? This cracked me up not to mention a really weird mental picture that i quickly purged from my mind. LOL
Sounds great and I love the idea of undercover. Will the Amazon dress up like a man?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014
Comment from CR Delport
Well, it sure sounds like lots of people had motive and a lot of the characters are certainly capable. Tenaya seems such an uncomplicated person. This is another well written chapter.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
Well, it sure sounds like lots of people had motive and a lot of the characters are certainly capable. Tenaya seems such an uncomplicated person. This is another well written chapter.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Apr-2014