Comment from Kausar_Javeria

Excellent

Hello there~
This is a really well-written poem and I absolutely love the concept. Great Job.. And I know we aren't supposed to review the first post but just wanted to tell you that that one's awesome too~
God Bless and Good Luck~!

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thanks for the great review. Yes, it's a bit hard to ignore the first poem when the two are supposed to function as a pair...

Steve

Comment from Petriesan

Excellent

I want to believe the maker surrounds us with love. I really do. mostly, I wonder if he gets involved at all with out lives, or os just watching, as we do ant farms. . .

good luck int he contest

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thank you.

My own belief is more like your own, and perhaps as in the first poem, but I felt this made a good contrast.

Steve

Comment from N.K. Wagner

Excellent

The bookends of life and death are portrayed as a race around a clock face that eventually stops as eternal life begins. Excellent, Steve. :) Nancy

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thanks, Nancy.

You would be surprised how many people didn't get that this was about life and death... the fate of a poet to be eternally misunderstood.

Steve

reply by N.K. Wagner on 16-Jun-2014

What your words are about is in the mind of the reader, Steve. People can only relate within the bounds of their personal experience, which may be very different from the poet's. The only response to be truly dreaded is "Huh?" :D Nancy

Comment from Dorothy Farrell

Excellent

This is very good poem for the Bookend... contest. Written in mono-rhyme it is a perfect match for the other end of the bookshelf. Read them both - both very good - judging you on the recent posting. Good luck in the contest. Regards Dorothy

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thanks, Dorothy - I'm glad you found the poems to be a good matching pair.

Steve

Comment from rouskin

Excellent

The Maker surrounds us with Love like a flower And Time the Unraveller loses his power...Well done Best of luck in the contest
Blessings, Rouskin

 Comment Written 14-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thank you!

Steve

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Questions are answered; no more they devour.

Rose petals fall in a sweet-scented shower.

Stopped are the Clock-faces; now is the hour.

The Maker surrounds us with Love like a flower

And Time the Unraveller loses his power.

I love this bookend poem......I love time the unraveller loses his power ....yay

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thanks, Jenny

Unfortunately time still has his power and it's Monday morning.

Steve

reply by kiwijenny on 15-Jun-2014

I know right....fortunately for me I am a teacher and this is summer holidays for me.i am coming home in two weeks...but my dad does not have wifi...yikes I will be nuts without Fanstory :o)

Comment from Dean Kuch

Excellent

An excellent pairing of poems, as each one stands completely on its own merits. The "sequel" poem was just as exceptionally well written as the original post, and when paired together, they make for compelling reading.

Very well composed. best of luck to you in the contest.

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Dean, thanks for the kind words.

Yes, I was pleased with the 'pairing' - I actually like the two together as a single poem more than as two separate pieces, if you know what I mean.

Steve

reply by Dean Kuch on 15-Jun-2014

I do too, Steve.

best of luck to you, my friend!

~DK~

Comment from lakeport

Excellent

Oustions and Answers, indeed these are very nice qustions and answers, nice rhyming, Good luck at the contest, God bless you. Lakeport.

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thank you!

Steve

reply by lakeport on 16-Jun-2014

your welcome,Lakeport.

Comment from Leineco

Excellent

Sequel (Bookend)

Questions are answered; no more they devour.
Rose petals fall in a sweet-scented shower.
Stopped are the Clock-faces; now is the hour.
The Maker surrounds us with Love like a flower
And Time the Unraveller loses his power.

What an interesting approach to "defining" death, in an ABC/mono-rhyme poem - beautifully crafted so that neither the ABC form, nor the mono-rhyme are the predominant impression - but rather the message :-)

Paired with "Unravelled" it makes for a definitive "Life Is. . .and Death Is. . ." Poem. Very nice pairing :-)

(I do wish you had shown the original post date and not added explanatory notes though :-(

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 13-Jun-2014

Thanks for the great review. Interestingly, yours is the only review to show clear understanding of my intentions - perhaps they were a little cryptic and I should have labelled them Life and Death.

I have fixed the date and comment issues - just after the voting began.... :O(

reply by Leineco on 13-Jun-2014

:-) Cool! (Thanks for making the changes)

Comment from victor 66

Excellent

Both of the poems are great and they fit well together in the "bookend". All rules have been followed. Good luck to you in the contest.

 Comment Written 13-Jun-2014

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reply by the author on 15-Jun-2014

Thanks, Victor.

Steve

reply by victor 66 on 15-Jun-2014

You are welcome.