This Aching Abyss
The silence is overwhelming...65 total reviews
Comment from krys123
Happy holidays, Dr. Shadow;
-if ever there was a Nietzsche poem then this would be it. Living as a defeatist or it is not so much a defeatist but living in the even keel of nonexistence is probably better than living in a world where one can be hurt by love for feelings.
-In the solemn empty void of the stark reality there is at least a barrier that is created to block out feelings. So much so that's like being a living dead creation that is without feeling, emotions and life.
-You did a beautiful job explaining this in such a definitively expressive manner.
-Great coordination of pictures and music add to this emptiness.
-Thanks for sharing Dean and take care and have a good one.
Alex
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Happy holidays, Dr. Shadow;
-if ever there was a Nietzsche poem then this would be it. Living as a defeatist or it is not so much a defeatist but living in the even keel of nonexistence is probably better than living in a world where one can be hurt by love for feelings.
-In the solemn empty void of the stark reality there is at least a barrier that is created to block out feelings. So much so that's like being a living dead creation that is without feeling, emotions and life.
-You did a beautiful job explaining this in such a definitively expressive manner.
-Great coordination of pictures and music add to this emptiness.
-Thanks for sharing Dean and take care and have a good one.
Alex
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Thanks for reading and understanding the basic gist of this piece, Alex.
You're absolutely right, and I feel that Alfred Lord Tennyson was a fool for having written, "'Tis better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all."
Take care...
~Dean
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You are very welcome, Dean, and take care of yourself and have a very happy holiday for you and your family.
Alex
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U 2, Mr. Contestant.
Comment from F. Wehr3
Excellent work! I love the emotion of this piece. As always, your alliteration is top notch.
No soothing salve for the soul.
No tender tendencies.--Nice!
Take care,
Russell
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Excellent work! I love the emotion of this piece. As always, your alliteration is top notch.
No soothing salve for the soul.
No tender tendencies.--Nice!
Take care,
Russell
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Hey, Russell.
Thank you for taking a gander at this, and for the complimentary review and shiny sixth star.
I appreciate it, and I am really glad to know that you enjoyed the read.
Take care, my
Comment from crybry67
Reality can be disappointing at times, or even unbearable. We tend to withdraw because its much easier. Not sure if that's what you are trying to convey...
It is a little confusing to me, to go from ' I must not ...or feel. Anything' to 'but at least here I feel something'
Awesome presentation! Blessings... Christy
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Reality can be disappointing at times, or even unbearable. We tend to withdraw because its much easier. Not sure if that's what you are trying to convey...
It is a little confusing to me, to go from ' I must not ...or feel. Anything' to 'but at least here I feel something'
Awesome presentation! Blessings... Christy
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Hey, Cry. Let's see if I can adequately answer you question to your satisfaction.
It...the meaning of the line you noted is simply this:
The word "nothing" is composed of two parts (and there is sort of a subtle double entendre at play here in this word and the way it's used too, as well ). "No," and "Thing". We can argue, then, that "nothing" is a "thing", in and of itself.
So, having said that, if you feel "no-thing", you at least feel "some"-"thing", cry.
Does that help to clarify my thought process a little better?
It's similar to those who often say, "If you have hope to cling to, then at least you have something."
But you see, "hope" isn't tangible. You can't taste "hope", or see "hope", or smell it. But that doesn't mean that hope is not a thing which can't be felt.
Same thing applies here.
Thanks for your review. It's appreciated.
~Dean
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Thanks for the clarification...sometimes I'm a little slow on the uptake...lol
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No worries. Sometimes I am too, LOL.
~Dean :)
Comment from Heather Knight
This is scary in a different way. The narrator prefers feeling sadness, horror, melancholy rather than feeling nothing. Very sad indeed but beautifully written. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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This is scary in a different way. The narrator prefers feeling sadness, horror, melancholy rather than feeling nothing. Very sad indeed but beautifully written. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Thanks, as always, for reading, Maria.
It is appreciated.
~Dean :}
Comment from ciliverde
The aching abyss of...depression, existential despair, loss of hope, recognition of reality? Each person has their particular version of heaven and hell, and sometimes the line is easily crossed. Existence is mysterious and strange - and seldom absolutely comfortable. I feel that I can relate in many ways to what you've written here. You're an amazing writer...
Carol
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
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The aching abyss of...depression, existential despair, loss of hope, recognition of reality? Each person has their particular version of heaven and hell, and sometimes the line is easily crossed. Existence is mysterious and strange - and seldom absolutely comfortable. I feel that I can relate in many ways to what you've written here. You're an amazing writer...
Carol
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
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Thanks, Carol, that is very kind of you to say.
You are an amazing writer yourself.
This is written about those spirits/souls who fall between the "cracks" of reality and existence.
Having said that, the word, "no"-"thing" is actually a misnomer. It is a "thing"...a NO thing. So, to feel NO thing is feeling at least something.
Take care, and enjoy the upcoming weekend.
Thanks again for reading.
~Dean
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Dean,
Your presentation with your poem is awesome. The color scheme is perfect as is the artwork. I like the use of great alliteration, too.
I believe your words are those being spoken by one who is torn between the harshness of reality & the equally harshness of being in a place where reality comes & goes. Readers are given specific examples from both 'worlds'. The narrator [you, right] is conflicted as to which one is better. Reality causes pain while the other choice masks it. So, do you want to love/live where you know there will be pain, or do you want to be where you feel safe? But the 'safe' place is only covering up the bad experiences
temporarily. There, you can ignore them for a while until they roar back to cause you to feel the pain again or to feel new pain.
Your writing is a joy to read. You know I did not read much horror, but you have caused me to give it a look. Sharing your personal life with FS takes courage. I commend you for that. While I look forward to your 'usual' writing, it is great to read your work in other genres.
Poems such as this one only prove that you are a talented writer with much to share.
Thanks for sharing.
Excellent! Jan
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Dean,
Your presentation with your poem is awesome. The color scheme is perfect as is the artwork. I like the use of great alliteration, too.
I believe your words are those being spoken by one who is torn between the harshness of reality & the equally harshness of being in a place where reality comes & goes. Readers are given specific examples from both 'worlds'. The narrator [you, right] is conflicted as to which one is better. Reality causes pain while the other choice masks it. So, do you want to love/live where you know there will be pain, or do you want to be where you feel safe? But the 'safe' place is only covering up the bad experiences
temporarily. There, you can ignore them for a while until they roar back to cause you to feel the pain again or to feel new pain.
Your writing is a joy to read. You know I did not read much horror, but you have caused me to give it a look. Sharing your personal life with FS takes courage. I commend you for that. While I look forward to your 'usual' writing, it is great to read your work in other genres.
Poems such as this one only prove that you are a talented writer with much to share.
Thanks for sharing.
Excellent! Jan
Comment Written 28-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2016
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Love your in-depth review, Jan, and if I had any more reviewer nominations to award, you would certainly be the recipient of one.
Let's just say I owe you one.
Thank you for not only taking the time to read and empathise with what I've expressed in this, but for the generous six as well.
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Dean,
You owe me nothing except friendship. Jan
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Thanks, Jan.
That you already have.
~Dean :}
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I know, Dean. But it doesn't hurt to tell someone [you] that you are important. Jan
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You're absolutely right, Jan.
It doesn't hurt at all.
Comment from Gloria ....
I really love this presentation with the rising smoke. Yeah, most cool.
Some jarring images in the first stanza, setting us up to feel downtrodden.
The repetitions work very well with To live, to dance, etc.
Yep, this is a fine free verse and I like it, lots.
Gloria
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
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I really love this presentation with the rising smoke. Yeah, most cool.
Some jarring images in the first stanza, setting us up to feel downtrodden.
The repetitions work very well with To live, to dance, etc.
Yep, this is a fine free verse and I like it, lots.
Gloria
Comment Written 27-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2016
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Thanks, Gloria, that is very kind of you to say.
This is written about those spirits/souls who fall between the "cracks" of reality and existence.
Having said that, the word, "no"-"thing" is actually a misnomer. It is a "thing"...a NO thing. So, to feel NO thing is feeling at least something.
I'm glad to know you enjoyed the way the repetitive lines were worked in, as well as the poem overall.
I rarely write free verse and for very good reason, LOL.
Take care, and enjoy the upcoming weekend.
Thanks again for reading.
~Dean :)
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
I am afraid this poem is related to your last, and the silence has its own meaning.
You have delivered a stunning poem, as to your usual quality.
You are a man of deep emotion who isn't afraid to express your feelings. Unfortunately, that often means wearing your heart on your sleeve and opening yourself for pain.
And yet share your genius with us.
Peace, my friend,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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I am afraid this poem is related to your last, and the silence has its own meaning.
You have delivered a stunning poem, as to your usual quality.
You are a man of deep emotion who isn't afraid to express your feelings. Unfortunately, that often means wearing your heart on your sleeve and opening yourself for pain.
And yet share your genius with us.
Peace, my friend,
Rhonda
Comment Written 27-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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I don't really know the proper way to respond to this other than to say thank you for empathising, Rhonda.
I do appreciate your support and your comments.
~Dean
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Sorry, I don't know the proper response, either, and it's late and I'm probably not making a lot of sense. Happens...
Just saying I think the two poems you wrote this week are in a way connected. I could be wrong.
Either way, your poem was brilliant.
Make more sense?
Comment from Irish Rain
Beautiful presentation and poem. Quiet desperation, where at least, you not only feel something, but it's something familiar, is always preferable to hopes and dreams. Because when you are in such a depressed state, the unfulfilled longing is more painful...than the quiet desperation. Quite poetic and lovely, blessings...
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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Beautiful presentation and poem. Quiet desperation, where at least, you not only feel something, but it's something familiar, is always preferable to hopes and dreams. Because when you are in such a depressed state, the unfulfilled longing is more painful...than the quiet desperation. Quite poetic and lovely, blessings...
Comment Written 27-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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Thank you for reading, Judy.l
Your poetic response was much better than the poem it was written for.
Be well,
~Dean
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Oh, not EVEN!!!
Comment from Joan E.
I admired your presentation with streaming, "arching" smoke. Your use of alliteration intensified the sense of feeling "something". Warm regards- Joan
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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I admired your presentation with streaming, "arching" smoke. Your use of alliteration intensified the sense of feeling "something". Warm regards- Joan
Comment Written 27-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 27-Nov-2016
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Thank you very much, Joan. I'm glad you enjoyed reading this, and I appreciate your stellar assessment.
Take care. I'm very grateful for your review, as always.
~Dean