Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Over the Top 1914 Eastern Front"A book of Poetry & Writing
238 total reviews
Comment from luisestable
A very telling piece this poem is. Your choice of words is to be congratulated here and your right to the point language is worthy of notice.
This is a well-written poem and it seems that you found inspiration when you wrote this one.
I like the way you were about writing this poem.
Luis
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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A very telling piece this poem is. Your choice of words is to be congratulated here and your right to the point language is worthy of notice.
This is a well-written poem and it seems that you found inspiration when you wrote this one.
I like the way you were about writing this poem.
Luis
Comment Written 23-May-2010
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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thank you Luis
Comment from dportwood
deepwater,
I like your poem with its reference to the carnage and waste brought on by world wars of the past. I think you should have stopped after line 8. Line 9 seems to be a lone disjointed statement.
Just my thought.
Duane
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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deepwater,
I like your poem with its reference to the carnage and waste brought on by world wars of the past. I think you should have stopped after line 8. Line 9 seems to be a lone disjointed statement.
Just my thought.
Duane
Comment Written 23-May-2010
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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thank Duane for the comment and reading
Comment from missy98writer
deepwarter,
profound poem about World War I. I loved the art work. Excellent rhyme, great narrative, vivid imagery and very good descriptive writing. I especially liked the lines:
What evil times have carnage chosen
For judgment on this land
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand
Now fix bayonets went the battle cry
Your a very talented poet and I enjoy reading your poetry. Impressive job on this poem. . .Melissa!
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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deepwarter,
profound poem about World War I. I loved the art work. Excellent rhyme, great narrative, vivid imagery and very good descriptive writing. I especially liked the lines:
What evil times have carnage chosen
For judgment on this land
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand
Now fix bayonets went the battle cry
Your a very talented poet and I enjoy reading your poetry. Impressive job on this poem. . .Melissa!
Comment Written 23-May-2010
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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thank you Melissa for reading Gary
Comment from fionageorge
Powerful, powerful poem, bringing real emotions from the battlefields. So well constructed, the poem flows freely, with good rhythm and rhyme.
Warmest regards, Marijke
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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Powerful, powerful poem, bringing real emotions from the battlefields. So well constructed, the poem flows freely, with good rhythm and rhyme.
Warmest regards, Marijke
Comment Written 23-May-2010
reply by the author on 23-May-2010
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thank you Marijke
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
This is a rousing and poignant poem about World War I. Striking first line: "Our dead will mock the searing heat." (I notice a small typo in the description above your title: I think you meant to say "First World War SOLDIER Writes Home.") Best wishes, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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This is a rousing and poignant poem about World War I. Striking first line: "Our dead will mock the searing heat." (I notice a small typo in the description above your title: I think you meant to say "First World War SOLDIER Writes Home.") Best wishes, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thank you for the comments Jeanie and for reading
Comment from Mastery
Good poetry, Gary. You have that gift of being able to reach different methods of getting your point painted so very well as in:
"What evil times have carnage chosen
For judgment on our lands"
Good job, Bravo! Bob
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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Good poetry, Gary. You have that gift of being able to reach different methods of getting your point painted so very well as in:
"What evil times have carnage chosen
For judgment on our lands"
Good job, Bravo! Bob
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thank you Bob
Comment from patmedium
Highly acceptable in my eyes, Gary.
['We are ready to make our stand' only a suggestion, but could you not remove the first two words on this line? It would then match the rest and make the flow much easier.]
Did you ever get round to reading chapter one of my book 'I do LOVE this life'? I would appreciate your opinion on it. Pat.
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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Highly acceptable in my eyes, Gary.
['We are ready to make our stand' only a suggestion, but could you not remove the first two words on this line? It would then match the rest and make the flow much easier.]
Did you ever get round to reading chapter one of my book 'I do LOVE this life'? I would appreciate your opinion on it. Pat.
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thanks pat i will read this weekend 'I do LOVE this life'?
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Just the first chapter, which is also the title of the collection. It's based in WWI.
Comment from fictionwriter
War always seems like a waste. Too many young men, and now women die for what seems like petty differences, but we need to defend our way of life. God depends on us to keep freedom alive. I loved this, on they go. Well done.
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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War always seems like a waste. Too many young men, and now women die for what seems like petty differences, but we need to defend our way of life. God depends on us to keep freedom alive. I loved this, on they go. Well done.
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thank you fictionwriter i can but try ...gary
Comment from Nicki_Mist
You always tell it like it is. You do a great job with imagery and I can always feel the emotion there in your poems. Sounds like they were ready to fight hand to hand combat? If I am reading it right. Keep on writing for I enjoy your poems.
Nicole
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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You always tell it like it is. You do a great job with imagery and I can always feel the emotion there in your poems. Sounds like they were ready to fight hand to hand combat? If I am reading it right. Keep on writing for I enjoy your poems.
Nicole
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thank you so much for reading Nicole Gary
Comment from Peter@Poole
Our dead will mock the searing heat
Our wounds will blister black
You tell us that our strength was sold
To help our country back
What evil times [have](has) carnage chosen
For judgment on our [lands](land)
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand
The following line seems to have no place in this poem, but, if it does, shouldn't it be paired with another line?
Now fix bayonets went the battle cry
My previous comments apply. However, there's great imagery, good rhyme and carnage personified. Peter
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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Our dead will mock the searing heat
Our wounds will blister black
You tell us that our strength was sold
To help our country back
What evil times [have](has) carnage chosen
For judgment on our [lands](land)
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand
The following line seems to have no place in this poem, but, if it does, shouldn't it be paired with another line?
Now fix bayonets went the battle cry
My previous comments apply. However, there's great imagery, good rhyme and carnage personified. Peter
Comment Written 22-May-2010
reply by the author on 22-May-2010
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thanks for reading peter