Beaver Moon Equals Freedom
It's nice to be your own boss23 total reviews
Comment from zanya
A short story evoking emotion portrayed with excellent use of landscape description and atmosphere - alone in the wilderness and relishing the quiet and being alone in Nature
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2020
  |
A short story evoking emotion portrayed with excellent use of landscape description and atmosphere - alone in the wilderness and relishing the quiet and being alone in Nature
Comment Written 19-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2020
-
I'm sorry it's taken so long to respond, I appreciate you reading and reviewing my story.
Comment from Pantygynt
This is a neat story about being first in a new territory. It does need a few tweaks. First, you are asked to start with a given sentence. The most common cause of disqualification in this contest is writers who like you don't do that. You have to retain the integrity of that sentence. You have to have a period after 'sky'. It is easily sort it but do it or you won't have a chance.
My other bone of contention lies at the othet end of the story.
'It was good to be a mountain man and seeing this country before throngs of settlers came west.' Think about it how does he know that '...throngs of settlers came west.' And that is in the past tense too.
This would fix it but it is really up to you
'It was good to be a mountain man and seeing this country before throngs of settlers come west, as they have already done further south on the prairies.'
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
 |
This is a neat story about being first in a new territory. It does need a few tweaks. First, you are asked to start with a given sentence. The most common cause of disqualification in this contest is writers who like you don't do that. You have to retain the integrity of that sentence. You have to have a period after 'sky'. It is easily sort it but do it or you won't have a chance.
My other bone of contention lies at the othet end of the story.
'It was good to be a mountain man and seeing this country before throngs of settlers came west.' Think about it how does he know that '...throngs of settlers came west.' And that is in the past tense too.
This would fix it but it is really up to you
'It was good to be a mountain man and seeing this country before throngs of settlers come west, as they have already done further south on the prairies.'
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 19-Nov-2020
-
I fixed the first sentence. My word count is 249. Your suggestion at the end would add 10 words to the count which I?m pretty sure would also be a disqualification.
-
Yes to exceed the word count would result in a DQ so you would have to prune elsewhere, but as I said it is up to you how you remedy the problem.
Comment from equestrik
There are not too many people who can experience the lifestyle you write about here, not these days. It sure seems like a free way of being even though it would be some tough winters.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2020
|
There are not too many people who can experience the lifestyle you write about here, not these days. It sure seems like a free way of being even though it would be some tough winters.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 07-Dec-2020
-
I'm sorry it's taken so long to respond, I appreciate you reading and reviewing my story.