The Gift
A nursing home Christmas76 total reviews
Comment from Tina Crute
Wow, Paul. This is remarkable in so many ways. The emphasis on compassion and love in action, combined with the gray and white artistry about a lonely person...just lovely in its entirety. I love these lines because loving others makes us become something other than ourselves. Your lines here state that..."For we had just become the cast
Of some white Christmas, long since past." Powerful and moving! Loving her changed who you all were becoming.
Great write!
Tina
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2021
Wow, Paul. This is remarkable in so many ways. The emphasis on compassion and love in action, combined with the gray and white artistry about a lonely person...just lovely in its entirety. I love these lines because loving others makes us become something other than ourselves. Your lines here state that..."For we had just become the cast
Of some white Christmas, long since past." Powerful and moving! Loving her changed who you all were becoming.
Great write!
Tina
Comment Written 18-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Tina. A true story with a little embellishment.
Comment from bhogg
Paul--I'm no poet, so can't respond to technical stuff. All I can do is comment on content and most important, message. I enjoyed this post a lot. I certainly enjoyed how you ended on who really benefited. Well written and beautifully presented.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2021
Paul--I'm no poet, so can't respond to technical stuff. All I can do is comment on content and most important, message. I enjoyed this post a lot. I certainly enjoyed how you ended on who really benefited. Well written and beautifully presented.
Comment Written 18-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Boss. This was a true story. The boys are my grandsons, and the lady was my mother. A little embellishment for dramatic effect.
Comment from Susan Newell
This deserves a six because it beautifully recounts the desire and commitment to spread Christmas cheer (love) to one in serious need of such. I don't know whether or not it is autobiographical, but it reads as authentic. Well done.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
This deserves a six because it beautifully recounts the desire and commitment to spread Christmas cheer (love) to one in serious need of such. I don't know whether or not it is autobiographical, but it reads as authentic. Well done.
Comment Written 18-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Susan. It is true. The boys are my grandsons, and the lady was my mother. I embellished a little for dramatic effect.
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Wonderful story. Perhaps she had some genetic memory that allowed her to recognize kin.
Comment from JLR
Paul, from the first word to the last word, your poetic Christmas story unpacked, line by line for me the reality of giving ... is the best gift the giver receives from the Father. Selfless service, to make a simple difference on one persons life lights the evening sky with stars of uncountable Joys.
Thanks for sharing this very well crafted poem. Merry Christmas!
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
Paul, from the first word to the last word, your poetic Christmas story unpacked, line by line for me the reality of giving ... is the best gift the giver receives from the Father. Selfless service, to make a simple difference on one persons life lights the evening sky with stars of uncountable Joys.
Thanks for sharing this very well crafted poem. Merry Christmas!
Comment Written 18-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks for the review and the kind words, JLR. This is one of my favorites.
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Poignant and heartwarming tale rendered in fine verse and excellent rhyme. Stunning piece. Compelling, sobering, and thought-provoking. I peg this as a winner.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
Poignant and heartwarming tale rendered in fine verse and excellent rhyme. Stunning piece. Compelling, sobering, and thought-provoking. I peg this as a winner.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Liz. A true story with a little embellishment.
Comment from LJbutterfly
Congratulations on writing the number two All Time Best poem for the month of December. Your poem is creative, heartfelt, and carries a deliberate Christmas message...give of yourself during this holiday season. Your rhyming and rhythm are impeccable throughout. Best wishes in the contest.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
Congratulations on writing the number two All Time Best poem for the month of December. Your poem is creative, heartfelt, and carries a deliberate Christmas message...give of yourself during this holiday season. Your rhyming and rhythm are impeccable throughout. Best wishes in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks LJ. A true story. The boys are my grandsons, and the lady is my mother.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Your Christmas poem tells a fine story so I hope it is based on fact. There is a good solid meter and strong rhyme throughout which maintains the flow of the piece and the message of kindness as well as the Christmas theme makes it a strong entry for the contest.
One tiny quibble - you describe the lady as being 'without a care', a phrase we usually reserve to describe someone happy and carefree which seems inappropriate here.
Good luck.
Steve
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
Your Christmas poem tells a fine story so I hope it is based on fact. There is a good solid meter and strong rhyme throughout which maintains the flow of the piece and the message of kindness as well as the Christmas theme makes it a strong entry for the contest.
One tiny quibble - you describe the lady as being 'without a care', a phrase we usually reserve to describe someone happy and carefree which seems inappropriate here.
Good luck.
Steve
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Steve. It is a true story. In my observations, I feel that Alzheimer's patients don't have a care.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
This is a beautiful story, Paul, wonderfully written. The emotions gave me goosebumps as I read of the gift these boys gave an old lady. Loved it. Sorry not to have a 6 left.
Cheers
Valda
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
This is a beautiful story, Paul, wonderfully written. The emotions gave me goosebumps as I read of the gift these boys gave an old lady. Loved it. Sorry not to have a 6 left.
Cheers
Valda
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Valda. A true story about my grandsons and my mother.
Comment from damommy
How lovely this is poem! It is very moving to read about such a day. That visit was the best gift you could have given that lady. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
How lovely this is poem! It is very moving to read about such a day. That visit was the best gift you could have given that lady. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 18-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Yvonne. A true story. The boys are my grandsons, and the lady was my mother.
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That makes the story even better.
Comment from Anne Johnston
Your poem brings tears to my eyes. Very well written, great rhyming and a reminder that the best gifts of Christmas are not material things but the joy of sharing time with someone who is alone. In this story all were blessed - the lady in the nursing home and the boys who brought her cheer. God blesses those who give to others.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2021
Your poem brings tears to my eyes. Very well written, great rhyming and a reminder that the best gifts of Christmas are not material things but the joy of sharing time with someone who is alone. In this story all were blessed - the lady in the nursing home and the boys who brought her cheer. God blesses those who give to others.
Comment Written 17-Dec-2021
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2021
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Thanks, Anne. It's a true story. The boys are my grandsons, and the lady was my mother. I added a few things for dramatic effect.
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You are welcome. I had a feeling it was a true story. Thanks for sharing.