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Detour

Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "On Your Mark, Get Set..."
Two very real women in not so real situation.

23 total reviews 
Comment from patcelaw
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your chapter for the book is very well written and I enjoyed very much listening to it. Your son structure your paragraph and and your punctuation all are very good and really gift credit to your writing ability. May you have a blessed day and may God bless your week. Patricia

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 Comment Written 29-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
    Thank you so much. I'm glad you are still enjoying this story. Gretchen
Comment from Bill Schott
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Gretchen, I so love this section of the story. Your spin on the relationships in this story is so very funny. Your sarcasm makes me laugh as I read. I'm so glad you and Rachelle did this.

 Comment Written 29-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
    We are having a blast. Each of us have our own distinct personalities and that helps us tell the same story but different view points. Thank you so much for this awesome review and the extra star. Gretchen
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

I love that you draw parallels between your colonoscopy and Jane. Very symbolic, indeed!

Calling Chuck was GREAT!! I love that touch from The Real World!

And I love that you and Jane had a bit of a stand-off, because now we can see that her perceptions of relationship closeness have NOTHING to do with reality! She truly IS the amalgam of Baby Jane and the Single White Female character Bridgette Fonda played. OY. The good news is that such dysfunction should make Rebekah be craving to return to her Amish ways!

Great chapter - full of vividness and action and humor. This line was my favorite:"Whoa, I'm eating Chic Fil A, for goodness sake. That's almost like being in church..." HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Whenever I read anything you've written, I am GUARANTEED one belly laugh. Most often, there's more, but there's always one extremely exceptional one.

Oh - this teeny omission right at the end: What on earth did either Rachelle or I do to have this woman join us? I'm gonna think about it and pray about, I can guarantee that. **I think you want another "it" after the second "about." Everything else is letter-perfect.

So fun doing this with you, Gretchen. You are a FANTASTIC writer. xoxo

 Comment Written 29-Sep-2024


reply by the author on 29-Sep-2024
    Thanks for catching the edit. It was fun. Now, we've established that Looney tunes is not a fan of me. But she has latched on to you. This is probably one of the most fun things I've ever done. Whether you lead a chapter of I do, we find our own way to carry on. Thanks for this awesome review. Gretchen
reply by Rachelle Allen on 29-Sep-2024
    My pleasure! Our take on clothing couldn't be more different, but our take on life - and the people we encounter - is that of two peas in a pod. It's a very comforting feeling. xoxox