Old Man at the River
An old man paints a river scene30 total reviews
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Hello Pam. I enjoyed reading this story within a poem but was left wondering what happened to the man who was drowning in the river did he drown or does it even matter to the painter in the scheme of his life? He lost his mother and thus, painted a painting of a river in tribute to her passing but whatever happened to the drowning man in the river?
I'm left confused and amazed that you left out this detail in your poetic story.
I love the painting of a man painting a river. It is quite surreal in expressionism.
Jesse
reply by the author on 16-Jan-2025
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Hello Pam. I enjoyed reading this story within a poem but was left wondering what happened to the man who was drowning in the river did he drown or does it even matter to the painter in the scheme of his life? He lost his mother and thus, painted a painting of a river in tribute to her passing but whatever happened to the drowning man in the river?
I'm left confused and amazed that you left out this detail in your poetic story.
I love the painting of a man painting a river. It is quite surreal in expressionism.
Jesse
Comment Written 16-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 16-Jan-2025
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Jesse, I did not leave out the detail of the man drowning. You must've just missed it as a line that says the drowner will live to conquer his fear and another one saying about picked them up.
These lines
A boat's coming closer, rescue is near.
The drowner will live to conquer his fear.
Thanks for the great review
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You are right. I must've missed those two lines. Thanks for clarifying this for me.
Have a great day.
Jesse
Comment from Michele Harber
What a lovely, heartwarming poem, and it's good to see your artwork again. I love the idea that the painting, in the poem, is a tribute to the artist's mother, and that seeing it there will help keep her alive in his memory. It gives the poem an uplifting, optimistic ending that I truly enjoyed.
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What a lovely, heartwarming poem, and it's good to see your artwork again. I love the idea that the painting, in the poem, is a tribute to the artist's mother, and that seeing it there will help keep her alive in his memory. It gives the poem an uplifting, optimistic ending that I truly enjoyed.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2025
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
First off, good job on doing the painting for your presentation. I wish I could do anything slightly artistic. I enjoyed the story of the artist painting a tribute for his mother. Lovely.
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First off, good job on doing the painting for your presentation. I wish I could do anything slightly artistic. I enjoyed the story of the artist painting a tribute for his mother. Lovely.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2025
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I enjoyed your quaint story of this painter Pam, your poem bounced along with a good flow and matching rhymes and it was a pleasure to read, love Dolly x x x
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I enjoyed your quaint story of this painter Pam, your poem bounced along with a good flow and matching rhymes and it was a pleasure to read, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 16-Jan-2025
Comment from jake cosmos aller
another reflective poem about memories. loved these lines
his gift for his mom is cheery and bright.
He'll hang in the hallway under the light.
It stays in his home because she has passed.
His tribute to her is finished at last.
He's satisfied now, exposing his heart.
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another reflective poem about memories. loved these lines
his gift for his mom is cheery and bright.
He'll hang in the hallway under the light.
It stays in his home because she has passed.
His tribute to her is finished at last.
He's satisfied now, exposing his heart.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
I certainly related to this. I'm a writer but also a fine artist. Much of this described experiments had. Set up and clean up are not my favorites. I also live to create paintings for loved ones. The rhymes flowed smoothly. The story and imagery were interesting to read. The image matches perfectly. Best wishes, Alex
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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I certainly related to this. I'm a writer but also a fine artist. Much of this described experiments had. Set up and clean up are not my favorites. I also live to create paintings for loved ones. The rhymes flowed smoothly. The story and imagery were interesting to read. The image matches perfectly. Best wishes, Alex
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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hi Alex. Thank you so much for sharing some tidbits about yourself and for this wonderful review.
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You're welcome. I was focused on my connection and I will reread from a new perspective soon. :) Alex
Comment from RJ Heritage
Nostalgic indeed. I like the theme and the approach to this poem. To me it shows how uneventful life might be in ending. Luckily there was a boat to the rescue. I found that little details made it realistic, like him not noticing the drawing man, so it is not on his canvas. Initially I found the line spacing was a little wide, but it fits the overall presentation. Cleverly written poem with imagery in a painting created by the writer's own hands.
RJ
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Nostalgic indeed. I like the theme and the approach to this poem. To me it shows how uneventful life might be in ending. Luckily there was a boat to the rescue. I found that little details made it realistic, like him not noticing the drawing man, so it is not on his canvas. Initially I found the line spacing was a little wide, but it fits the overall presentation. Cleverly written poem with imagery in a painting created by the writer's own hands.
RJ
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you for all of your feedback and for this wonderful review
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You're welcome
RJ
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
I like the way one scene trips into another and life passes before him as he paints his picture. I think you could go on writing poetry forever, Pam. It seems to flow effortlessly and you're never deterred, e.g. ducks and flux. A delightful concept in this that the painting is a tribute to his deceased mother. And cheer is generated from sadness.
Better if you simply say: Old man at the river (without 's)
Well done, Pam! Debbie
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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I like the way one scene trips into another and life passes before him as he paints his picture. I think you could go on writing poetry forever, Pam. It seems to flow effortlessly and you're never deterred, e.g. ducks and flux. A delightful concept in this that the painting is a tribute to his deceased mother. And cheer is generated from sadness.
Better if you simply say: Old man at the river (without 's)
Well done, Pam! Debbie
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Hi Deb thank you for your thorough and usual delightful review
I'm not sure what you mean about removing the 's
It would then say old man at the river painting the scene which is not a full sentence
Thanks again
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Ok, I see now. It just seemed a bit awkward tagged on to river. Maybe better as Old man('s)...
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Yes I thought of tat too. I'll change it now
Comment from DonandVicki
A very interesting poem that captures a painting in poetic verse, very original. Your painting fits and complements your poem very well. I enjoyed the read.
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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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A very interesting poem that captures a painting in poetic verse, very original. Your painting fits and complements your poem very well. I enjoyed the read.
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Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much for your beautiful review
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very nicely written and beautifully presented for about an old man at the sea with his paint painting what he seeing. I enjoyed very much reading it because I am an amateur artist myself. May you have a pleasant day and may God bless you. Patricia.
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reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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This is a very nicely written and beautifully presented for about an old man at the sea with his paint painting what he seeing. I enjoyed very much reading it because I am an amateur artist myself. May you have a pleasant day and may God bless you. Patricia.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 15-Jan-2025
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Thank you, Patricia for sharing that you are an artist and for your wonderful review
