Reviews from

Indiscretion

The perils of cheating with her best friend

25 total reviews 
Comment from MJMuraco
Excellent
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Yes, this story truly was written in bad taste. The dialogue contains some very obscene language. It does bring the point across that the wife will do something awful and doesn't forgive the cheater when he uses the drunk excuse. Hopefully this did not happen in real life to the author or anyone that he knows.

 Comment Written 16-Nov-2008


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2008
    Thanks for the kind review. Sorry for the offensive nature. I normally don't write like this, but I figured I would have some fun with the contest requirements. I can assure you this didn't happen to me. Thanks again.
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Excellent
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This is really a good tale! You have met the requirements of the contest quite definately!!! Love the last line! Let him choke on it! Quite distasteful, but believably written. Hugs and smiles, Susanne

 Comment Written 16-Nov-2008


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2008
    Susanne, thanks so much for the kind words and review.
Comment from Sarah_Goldwell
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

it's actually quite good but because it is so short it ends abruptly and leaves you feeling cheated. You may want to look at the 2nd piece of dialogue, and put the quote marks at the begining

 Comment Written 16-Nov-2008


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2008
    Thanks for the kind words and for pointing out the omission with the quotation marks. I fixed it immediately.
Comment from jackiesmuse
Excellent
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Well, it is a bit rough but I can hear this actually being said. In fact, I was in a local bar (a long time ago) where I heard something similar. Conflict! (for sure) and I think you did a great job with using dialogue only, in a short span, to convey a lot. Good luck in the contest.
:-) jackie

 Comment Written 16-Nov-2008


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2008
    Jackie, thanks for the kind words and encouragement. Bill
Comment from The Unlikely author
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

ok so this contest is to be rude, socially unacceptable and just dialogue? How did I miss this one? Although this may be what some consider offensive, it is after all what happens in many other peoples lives. I think you have followed contest guidelines to the letter. I laughed at her thoughts good luck in the contest.

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 Comment Written 16-Nov-2008


reply by the author on 16-Nov-2008
    Thanks for the kind review and comments.