Bluejean Baby Queen
It hurts so bad ...25 total reviews
Comment from Ted T
Hi Susan :)
You get another virtual "Sixer" for this story. I saw the movie you mentioned, it was brutal to say the least.
Good writing and pacing to match the movement of the piece. Quite unexpected content from shy Susan.
I've copied it for your book.
One small nit:
[The] should be [They] rolled into the back,
I'll fix it on my end, you need to do so here.
Ted
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Hi Susan :)
You get another virtual "Sixer" for this story. I saw the movie you mentioned, it was brutal to say the least.
Good writing and pacing to match the movement of the piece. Quite unexpected content from shy Susan.
I've copied it for your book.
One small nit:
[The] should be [They] rolled into the back,
I'll fix it on my end, you need to do so here.
Ted
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Thank you Ted! I really appreciate the sharp eye, and a great review too! :) Susan
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You're most welcome :)
Comment from RaymondJohn
She's obviously much prettier than the Monster. Excellent use of detail to move the story along quickly. I could see everything very clearly. Great write. Ray.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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She's obviously much prettier than the Monster. Excellent use of detail to move the story along quickly. I could see everything very clearly. Great write. Ray.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Hi! I send you genuine appreciation and a huge cyber hug for being here for me; and taking time. Smiles!, Susan
Comment from Rob Caudle
Wow, I like the twist pun intended. I was concerned at how quickly she managed to leave but could not stop reading .You played this out well. Revenge is indeed sweeter when the victim does not see it coming, again pun intended.
Rob
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Wow, I like the twist pun intended. I was concerned at how quickly she managed to leave but could not stop reading .You played this out well. Revenge is indeed sweeter when the victim does not see it coming, again pun intended.
Rob
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Hi Rob! Thanks! I sure appreciate you reading and for your comments too! Great to hear from you and as always, I really appreciate a review!! :) Susan
Comment from Gungalo
Gosh Susan, this was so good. Only a real lady could pull this off and he was the target from the word go. Nasty stuff this but you handled it really well.
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reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Gosh Susan, this was so good. Only a real lady could pull this off and he was the target from the word go. Nasty stuff this but you handled it really well.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Hi! I send you genuine appreciation and a huge cyber hug for being here for me; and taking time. LOVE, Susan
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Thanks girl.
Comment from c_lucas
This is a little out of your style of writing, but you pulled it off. Your short story is very well written with a good twist at the end.
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reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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This is a little out of your style of writing, but you pulled it off. Your short story is very well written with a good twist at the end.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2012
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2012
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Hi! I send you genuine appreciation and a huge cyber hug for being here for me; and taking time. LOVE, Susan
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You're welcome, Susan. Charlie