A Little Viking's Tale
A rhyming short story for children122 total reviews
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hello Eric, this is such a lovely story for children. Lessons to be learned can be boring - this is never that. I'm not sure ignoring a stop sign is a good idea. This could be a dangerous thing to urge a child to do - though I do like the advice of 'never give up - there is always a way'. Very well written - enjoyable read. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Hello Eric, this is such a lovely story for children. Lessons to be learned can be boring - this is never that. I'm not sure ignoring a stop sign is a good idea. This could be a dangerous thing to urge a child to do - though I do like the advice of 'never give up - there is always a way'. Very well written - enjoyable read. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from Begin Again
Lessons learned in a gentle, amusing way for children. The small ones like to see animated things - because it brings life to them instead of just being boring signs telling them what to do. I think most will get the message of "trying to do their best to complete a project" and not just focus on ignoring the stop sign... Our children of today are far brighter I think.
Always, Carol
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Lessons learned in a gentle, amusing way for children. The small ones like to see animated things - because it brings life to them instead of just being boring signs telling them what to do. I think most will get the message of "trying to do their best to complete a project" and not just focus on ignoring the stop sign... Our children of today are far brighter I think.
Always, Carol
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from Sanku
Very well written story poem. It ives a very interesting point of view of Eric who finds problems with stop sign .but he solved it beautifully .Very good story of Eric, the Viking.Excellent rhymes too.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Very well written story poem. It ives a very interesting point of view of Eric who finds problems with stop sign .but he solved it beautifully .Very good story of Eric, the Viking.Excellent rhymes too.
Comment Written 15-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from Hitcher
I like stories in poem, actually I just like stories. I like telling them, writing them and reading them. The Imagination is a glorious thing for it too is and explorer. it sails to uncharted lands looking for untold treasures.
Great story telling!
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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I like stories in poem, actually I just like stories. I like telling them, writing them and reading them. The Imagination is a glorious thing for it too is and explorer. it sails to uncharted lands looking for untold treasures.
Great story telling!
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from Janetsue
You have told the Vikings tale in excellent rhyme and it is a creative way to teach about perseverance and getting a necessary job accomplished, as well as adding a little bit of history.
A slight edit needed here: Petey said, "We have (to) go to town
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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You have told the Vikings tale in excellent rhyme and it is a creative way to teach about perseverance and getting a necessary job accomplished, as well as adding a little bit of history.
A slight edit needed here: Petey said, "We have (to) go to town
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from lyenochka
Congratulations on getting your rhyming children's story published. If the message is to keep going against all odds, then it is a good one. But I'm afraid some could misunderstand the story to ignore stop signs.
Comment:
I checked your link and your title/subtitle has a typo:
they need to fix thier ship (their)
Suggestions:
And all of my songs have now come un-sungs." (unsung) It's okay to use near rhymes.
How else do you plan to equip." (How else do you plan to equip?") It is a question not a statement.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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Congratulations on getting your rhyming children's story published. If the message is to keep going against all odds, then it is a good one. But I'm afraid some could misunderstand the story to ignore stop signs.
Comment:
I checked your link and your title/subtitle has a typo:
they need to fix thier ship (their)
Suggestions:
And all of my songs have now come un-sungs." (unsung) It's okay to use near rhymes.
How else do you plan to equip." (How else do you plan to equip?") It is a question not a statement.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
Comment from Dr. Nad
This is a well-written modern-day adaptation of Eric the Red. This is a piece that will keep the attention of the kids and provide an element of humor. The rhyming flowed well with the word choices.
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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This is a well-written modern-day adaptation of Eric the Red. This is a piece that will keep the attention of the kids and provide an element of humor. The rhyming flowed well with the word choices.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 15-Oct-2021
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thank you
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You are most welcome. Sorry so late! I have been gone for about 10 days.
Comment from Michele Harber
This is a cute story, and I like the originality of the antagonist being a stop sign. I also got a kick out of the anachronism of the Viking in the modern city. Your rhymes are well chosen. The one thing that bothers me, though, is that, as this is a children's story, you missed a teachable moment. You basically told children it's okay and safe to disobey a traffic light, and that could have very dangerous consequences. You could easily convert it to the Viking wanting to cross against the light, and then a car comes speeding past, so he realizes the light was correct. Then he waits for the green and still gets all the supplies he needs, but this time he does it safely.
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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This is a cute story, and I like the originality of the antagonist being a stop sign. I also got a kick out of the anachronism of the Viking in the modern city. Your rhymes are well chosen. The one thing that bothers me, though, is that, as this is a children's story, you missed a teachable moment. You basically told children it's okay and safe to disobey a traffic light, and that could have very dangerous consequences. You could easily convert it to the Viking wanting to cross against the light, and then a car comes speeding past, so he realizes the light was correct. Then he waits for the green and still gets all the supplies he needs, but this time he does it safely.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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Thank you for your advice? A possible story life for you when you write and illustrate your first children?s book
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I?ve already written a few, although I don?t do my own illustrations. My suggestion was not meant to offend, merely to suggest that children often take words at face value.
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I didn?t take offense? did you get the message here? Perseverance? No? Kids have imagination? It?s a tiny Viking in a city? He has never seen a stop sign let alone one that talks? The stop sign is animated?It?s OK I don?t take offense I appreciate your opinion although most people get it. I?m not offended at all
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I recognized everything you mentioned, and had even commented that I enjoyed the anachronism. I only questioned the very, very end of your story, where he blithely crossed against the light with no consequence.
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thanks
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You're welcome.
Comment from Willie P. Smith
I believe if the word "even" in the second line of the next to last stanza was taken out, the stanza would flow better. This is not a criticism, merely a suggestion, this writing is a six with or without the change.
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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I believe if the word "even" in the second line of the next to last stanza was taken out, the stanza would flow better. This is not a criticism, merely a suggestion, this writing is a six with or without the change.
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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Thanks It probably is in the book I?ll take a look thanks for the excellent I?m sorry exceptional review
Comment from royowen
What a fascinating story of Erik the Viking being stopped by a talking stop sign, but Erik being bold and brave like Vikings should be, by necessity, went in by at the second attempt, obtained the tools required, and on he sailed. Beautifully written loved this quirky tale. Well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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What a fascinating story of Erik the Viking being stopped by a talking stop sign, but Erik being bold and brave like Vikings should be, by necessity, went in by at the second attempt, obtained the tools required, and on he sailed. Beautifully written loved this quirky tale. Well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 14-Oct-2021
reply by the author on 14-Oct-2021
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Thanks for your excellent review
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Most welcome