Reviews from

The Animal Doctor

Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Ten Oakes"
Love Among the Thorns

39 total reviews 
Comment from robina1978
Excellent
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It's been a while since I saw your last chapter or did I miss some. This is nice: Nathan and Grace are married and her parents give them a ranch as a wedding present. Soon there first child arrives.

 Comment Written 17-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 17-Dec-2013
    No, I don't think you've missed any chapters. I just take longer to post. I earn all of my money from reading and it takes a lot of reading to earn enough for first page posting. Thank you for reviewing, my dear. Merry Christmas.
Comment from misscookie
Excellent
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This was a very interesting chapter. you had my attention from the first line to the last.
There was never a dull moment.
Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 17-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 17-Dec-2013
    Thank you misscookie.
reply by misscookie on 17-Dec-2013
    Your very welcome, it was my pleasure.
Comment from ElegantButler
Excellent
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Though there isn't much written as far as content, there is a great deal of context and emotion. Each character is strong and the reader is able to feel their feelings.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from Sam Mendonca
Excellent
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A very interesting chapter, leaving the reader wondering what is going to happen next in the storyline.


I like the photo you chose to go with the story. It got my attention to read the chapter.


Very well done. :-)

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you Sam.
Comment from Titanx9
Excellent
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I didn't think it bland; I consider it a transition chapter because I'm wondering where Nathan's loyalty lies. It seems Elizabeth is worried he still has feelings for this woman whom he probably will see if Grace keeps yelling and screaming. I look forward to seeing what happens when the couple brings the baby home.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you Titanx9 for reading my chapter. I really appreciate it.
Comment from Zue65
Excellent
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Well God is really fair, we cannot have everything as in the case of Grace and Nathan. They have all the things they need, wealth. a beautiful mansion and a comfortable life but it took them several miscarriages and almost a failed marriage before they were blessed with a child. I like the flow of the story and I look forward to reading the next chapter. God bless.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you so much for reading. I'M glad you want to continue to read this story.
Comment from Auroraboreal800
Excellent
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What a wonderful love story. Your writing is impeccable and I really appreciate that in a writer. Also you truly bring the story to life. This is absolutely an enjoyable reading.
GREAT job!
:)

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you for reading. I really appreciate your review.
Comment from Schalk Jacobs
Excellent
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Oh boy, I see trouble coming on the horizon. Nate must just mot make the same mistake again. Him and Margaret is like adding gasoline to fire. A bad idea. Another well written chapter, my friend.

Sorry for not reading the previous chapter. somehow I had missed it. did read it and it sets the tone quite adequately for what will undoubtedly happen.

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you Jacobs for reading my new chapter.
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
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through the darken clouds - darkened
Don't we, honey - add comma for direct address
The most expensive wedding present we received was a kitchen table and chairs LOL
Over joyed - Overjoyed
Excellent detail of setting
Good natural-sounding dialogue :-) Brooke

 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you Brook. I'll make the corrections. I'm glad you liked the dialogue.
Comment from Sylvia Page
Excellent
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A misty grey hovered over the London square. [A grey mist hovered over the square of London]

then stared at them awaiting a responds/response

Shouldn't this para come after they have seen the inside and back of the house?
The two stood and gazed upon the 21,000 square foot, 34 room mansion. It was built by English architect, Sir Alfred Bringhum. It featured 10 bed rooms--including two master suites, 15 baths, 20 closets, 12 fireplaces, a ball room, and a 200 seat formal dining area. The back of the house showcased a lovely brook, many oak trees and formal gardens for hosting events.

Mary said who spoke as though (no comma is needed after 'said'

"No[,] No, Mother

The story flowed quite well except the above para did not seem to fit since they have only arrived and is surprised into receiving the house as a gift. The other point was Nathan's submissive response and acceptance of such a rich gift, which in my mind goes against the grain and would have expected some kind of protest.

Cheers,
Sylvia


 Comment Written 16-Dec-2013


reply by the author on 16-Dec-2013
    Thank you for you review and for the suggestions. You could be right about the paragraph, but I figured the narrator could say what was in the mansion. But I will consider your suggestion (seriously). And if you're right, I'll certainly change it.