Humanity Project
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Hufacs"A science fiction book about genetic engineering.
30 total reviews
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent. This is a great story and it has become more interesting with each and every chapter. So, now you reveal what they are doing in this secret city. I'm enjoying this story very much.
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Excellent. This is a great story and it has become more interesting with each and every chapter. So, now you reveal what they are doing in this secret city. I'm enjoying this story very much.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Thank you so much, that is very sweet. I'm having fun writing it!
Rhonda
Comment from Lu Saluna
Ok, that goes against every ethical and moral implication I know of, be it medical or science. Wow, didn't see that coming. Nice little shocker.
Really well delivered too I might add. This is getting really awesome!
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Ok, that goes against every ethical and moral implication I know of, be it medical or science. Wow, didn't see that coming. Nice little shocker.
Really well delivered too I might add. This is getting really awesome!
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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I know, right? And yet it's really an analogy of the other groups of people who have been treated as though they are just animals. It continues as a sci-fi/fantasy/political and moral commentary.
Thanks for reading,
Rhonda
Comment from lyenochka
Fabulous imagination! It's a good technique to use this book as the means for Ayala and Koko find out about their unique DNA. Ayala means "deer" so she must come from "deer?" And Koko means "stork" so I wonder if she has bird DNA or if the names are just names. Very intriguing!
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Fabulous imagination! It's a good technique to use this book as the means for Ayala and Koko find out about their unique DNA. Ayala means "deer" so she must come from "deer?" And Koko means "stork" so I wonder if she has bird DNA or if the names are just names. Very intriguing!
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Thank you so much. I do look into the meanings of names, and the deer one does have meaning. The others were just Native American Names, though Sani means "wise one". Both Koko and Ayala have Coyote DNA, but the deer is significant.
Thanks for looking deeply into the meanings, because most everything I write has deeper meaning that seems on the surface.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
OH my goodness. I never thought it was like that but I knew there was a reason they were not in society. What a unique imagination you had for this subject. Now I am intrigued for the baby
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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OH my goodness. I never thought it was like that but I knew there was a reason they were not in society. What a unique imagination you had for this subject. Now I am intrigued for the baby
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 21-Feb-2017
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Thank you so much, and the meaning is double. It is a science fiction story, but reflects the way other ethnic groups have been treated throughout time, often treated as less than human. So, a story within a story.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from TheWriteTeach
Wow. This is getting deeper and deeper. I never expected this twist - crossing human DNA with animal DNA! BTW, just in case you didn't already know - the science teacher in you is seriously coming through, here! LOL Just when I think this can't possibly get any better, it does. You are taking the reader on a wild Sci-Fi ride. The info in this chapter gave me chills. The door (or can of worms?) you opened in this chapter is going to have the reader asking good questions and anxiously looking (reading) for the answers. After whetting the readers' appetite, and have everyone in stunned/shocked silence, you stop at a place that is about to give more information to unlock the mystery of the Humanity Project. Stellar chapter.
Can't tell if I missed something, if the answer is coming later, or if this info is a little off. If all subjects are sterilized at puberty, how will they be able to breed in stage two? Also, if only orphaned children are taken into the project, how can the book list parents and children?
I noticed two things -
Hufacs, short for, 'humanity factor' to remind us of {thier} human side. (typo - should be 'their')
"{You've} were with us for more than a year," (not sure how you want this to read: 'You've been with us' or 'You were with us')
Again, absolutely stellar chapter, Rhonda. Excellent writing.
Suzanne
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Wow. This is getting deeper and deeper. I never expected this twist - crossing human DNA with animal DNA! BTW, just in case you didn't already know - the science teacher in you is seriously coming through, here! LOL Just when I think this can't possibly get any better, it does. You are taking the reader on a wild Sci-Fi ride. The info in this chapter gave me chills. The door (or can of worms?) you opened in this chapter is going to have the reader asking good questions and anxiously looking (reading) for the answers. After whetting the readers' appetite, and have everyone in stunned/shocked silence, you stop at a place that is about to give more information to unlock the mystery of the Humanity Project. Stellar chapter.
Can't tell if I missed something, if the answer is coming later, or if this info is a little off. If all subjects are sterilized at puberty, how will they be able to breed in stage two? Also, if only orphaned children are taken into the project, how can the book list parents and children?
I noticed two things -
Hufacs, short for, 'humanity factor' to remind us of {thier} human side. (typo - should be 'their')
"{You've} were with us for more than a year," (not sure how you want this to read: 'You've been with us' or 'You were with us')
Again, absolutely stellar chapter, Rhonda. Excellent writing.
Suzanne
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you so much, Suzanne!
They are sterilized at puberty, but with reversible tube tying. That's why there are some unexpected pregnancies.
The children aren't orphans at all. It's all a lie to the people. The kids are born in the hospital wing and raised there until they turn five. They have women in the hospital that are used for breeding, and male sperm contributors. More on this will come out later.
Sorry for the craziness of the sci fi part, but, yeah, my geek side comes out in this one. If you were to go back and read, and I'm not asking you to do so, but there's lots of foreshadowing, a lot with the description of the people, and using animal references.
I knew this chapter would be far out there, but it'll fall back into a pattern of normalcy, with the info hanging in the background.
Thanks, again, for the wonderful review,
Rhonda
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Hey, I wasn't criticizing the crazy Sci-Fi at all. It's awesome! I loved every last word. I think I might go back and reread some chapters, so I can catch foreshadowing. I LOVE foreshadowing. I did miss a few chapters. I bet there's important stuff (technical term) I missed.
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The foreshadowing is subtle, but very much intentional. There's more, but I won't give anything away.
I am glad you like the sci-fi part. I still try to make it seem normal, but spill out a few times into the "way out there". haha
Again, thanks!!
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine chapter, Rhonda--and they're freaks, huh? Scary thought, that--experimenting on embryos--that sounds like the ultimate God complex!
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Another fine chapter, Rhonda--and they're freaks, huh? Scary thought, that--experimenting on embryos--that sounds like the ultimate God complex!
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Oh yeah, they're crazy people. Poor Hokee people!
Comment from emptypage
Oh, noooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never expected this, not at all. I know how stunned Ayala must be. I'm right there with her. I finally have some compassion for her. Poor woman!
My empathy isn't because she is "part animal," but because she feels so "less than," now, so duped, and so left out of what was truly going on.
And the plot, as they say, thickens.
You misspelled "their" in the first line of the second paragraph.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Oh, noooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never expected this, not at all. I know how stunned Ayala must be. I'm right there with her. I finally have some compassion for her. Poor woman!
My empathy isn't because she is "part animal," but because she feels so "less than," now, so duped, and so left out of what was truly going on.
And the plot, as they say, thickens.
You misspelled "their" in the first line of the second paragraph.
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you for the wonderful review. There's twists and turns in this whole book, and this was one of the biggest ones. Crazy stuff, but it'll go back to a sort of normal for a while!
I have chosen an outrageous reason for them to be discriminated about, but it is analogy to other groups of people who've been thought of, and treated like, less than human. Most of my fantasy creatures and situations are a commentary on real life issues.
Thanks for the wonderful review,
Rhonda
Comment from Heidi M
You are creating an amazing story here, Rhonda. The explanation in the book sounded so real.
Some minor spags:
remind us of th(ei)r human side
retaining (its) integrity -Delete apostrophe
(You) were with us - Delete 've
buried - Delete second 'r'
Good job creating unease about Koko's baby
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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You are creating an amazing story here, Rhonda. The explanation in the book sounded so real.
Some minor spags:
remind us of th(ei)r human side
retaining (its) integrity -Delete apostrophe
(You) were with us - Delete 've
buried - Delete second 'r'
Good job creating unease about Koko's baby
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you for the generous six star rating, my friend.
Thank you for pointing out the spag. I never could fine, "buried", but will look again later.
I'm glad it sounded realistic, because this part of the story is a bit far-fetched, but may not be too far from the truth. haha.
Thanks you so much,
Rhonda
Comment from mbroyles2
An excellent chapter.
It explains the humanity project and it's purpose.
I'm sure Ayala and Koko are in for a surprise in the next chapter, but I can see some good points at being part coyote, especially in the desert.
I know they are going to go to Mine City and try and rescue everyone, well at least the baby's father.
That has the making of a thrilling read.
Michael
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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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An excellent chapter.
It explains the humanity project and it's purpose.
I'm sure Ayala and Koko are in for a surprise in the next chapter, but I can see some good points at being part coyote, especially in the desert.
I know they are going to go to Mine City and try and rescue everyone, well at least the baby's father.
That has the making of a thrilling read.
Michael
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you, Michael. They could probably use the help of Granite and the Shadow right now!! Innocents trying to fight monsters. Good thing, like you said, they have coyote blood. It may not sound nice, but it could prove helpful.
Probably right on Mine City. haha.
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is scary. I can't imagine people doing experiments with humans and animals but I'm sure somebody has tried. This is another good write.
"You've were with us for more than a year," Ayala said. (omit 've)
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reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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This is scary. I can't imagine people doing experiments with humans and animals but I'm sure somebody has tried. This is another good write.
"You've were with us for more than a year," Ayala said. (omit 've)
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Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you for the review, and comments! Unfortunately, there have been many groups of people throughout time that have been treated as though they were less than human. Especially by Hitler and his Nazis. As with all my work, the people stand as analogies for other people or events.
Thanks again,
Rhonda