The Horseman
A man in the middle of nowhere ...31 total reviews
Comment from Fireshadow
Susan - great short story with strong narrative and visually descriptive details. When the horses were shot my heart constricted in my chest. Dialogue is strong and appropriate for character and situation and the artwork is a good fit for the narrative. Couple of suggestions :
(1) palomino (not palimino)
(2) the young horse[']s movements
(3) "What'cha make a that[,] Cal?"
Otherwose, a terrific write. Very well done, my friend. Amarillys
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reply by the author on 11-Sep-2010
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Susan - great short story with strong narrative and visually descriptive details. When the horses were shot my heart constricted in my chest. Dialogue is strong and appropriate for character and situation and the artwork is a good fit for the narrative. Couple of suggestions :
(1) palomino (not palimino)
(2) the young horse[']s movements
(3) "What'cha make a that[,] Cal?"
Otherwose, a terrific write. Very well done, my friend. Amarillys
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Sep-2010
reply by the author on 11-Sep-2010
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Hi there! THANK YOU! I am so happy you liked this, I am practicing dialogue and narration...let me know if this is too much narrative?? I am told I do that too much. AND I will fix the spags right now!! Bless you for this help and wonderfully encouraging review too!! ") Love, Susan