Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 46 "Part three, Chapter 14"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

65 total reviews 
Comment from Rdfrdmom2
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

barbara:

Happy New Year! Another fine chapter - a
good way for me to start my reviewing for
2012. I had a Jack Russell Terrier take a
hunk out of my husband's hand once - it was
not a pretty sight.

thanks for sharing
love,
jan

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from AprilShower
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted



Hi, Barbara. This is well written. Babies do like to play with boxes. How old is Michael? I am wondering because he's taking his first steps. I liked the part with the grape stain. I'm surprise they couldn't get the stain out of the carpet. They seem like a very nice family.

April

April

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Michael is about 9 months old now. Thank you for the kind review.
reply by AprilShower on 01-Jan-2012
    You're welcome, Barbara. Thanks for answering.
Comment from Teri7
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Barbara, This is an excellent chapter you have penned. You used very good descriptive wording and I love the notes at the end. Hugs, Teri

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Thank you for the kind review and support.
reply by Teri7 on 06-Jan-2012
    you are so welcome
Comment from TheLadyHoll
Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

LOVE that you're writing about this topic. I'm a member and a supporter of the Joyful Heart Foundation that helps survivors of domestic and sexual abuse and their families. Painful to read about at times but I'm glad for her relationship with Troy. Hopefully they'll help each other out! Cheers :)

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    I don't know what I need to correct to receive a five stars. I would make the corrections.
Comment from Belinda
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi, Barbara. This is delightful. I can imagine those first steps. My daughter was late in walking so hers were magical. I'd like to show you my favorite lines/paragraph in this story:
"The moral of this story, if there is one, is that you shouldn't sweat the small stuff. Children will be children." Paul ran his fingers through Michael's hair. "And you'll make mistakes raising him and he'll make mistakes growing up. You'll just have to love him through the rough times."

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    I like that line too. I think it says a lot about parenting. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from alexisleech
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Keep on harping, because I'm sure that there can't be a better subject to keep harping on about! Another excellent part chapter... well done, and Happy New Year!

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Thank you for the kind review. I can tell you've been married awhile. LOL
Comment from Joan E.
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Thanks for placing a banner on this chapter so that I didn't miss it this busy time of the year. Yes, the artwork works well until you can get the perfect one painted by your husband. I liked the idea of the "spill as a trophy" and the comic fact that Troy was no toddler at the time! The "moral" is good advice too, and capturing the "first step" is delightful. Happy New Year's Sunday- Joan

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Thank you for the kind review and understanding of what I was attempting to do.
reply by Joan E. on 01-Jan-2012
    Your work is always appealing and evocative. -Joan
Comment from Tonulak
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I liked this scen as it seemed completely natural and unforced. It seems like a big love fest, though. Is this the first time Anna goes to visit the parents? There could have been some sort of tension or undercurrent, otherwise it's just a description of having dinner. The scene in the backyard could have the dramatic potential you need in this chapter; some tears, Anna feeling inadequate or unworthy; I think she does a bit, but it could be played a bit more. Good writing, clean and natural.

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Anna lived in that house before. Paul was her divorce lawyer. There's a lot of history there. I guess this is your first chapter. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from missy98writer
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Barbara,
The end of this chapter I cried tears of joy when little Michael walked for his momma. I think Troy and his family are a godscend for Anna. She has a low self doubt and esteeme all thinks to her abusive ex. She tripped all over herself because her son spilled his grape juice on the carpet, but he had an accident easy to clean up. If a person comes undone over that they need to check themselves before the wreck themselves. Your latest chapter is splendidly written.  In your latest chapter you've used great descriptive writing and very good dialogue. Your story is enthralling and you do an excellent job showing instead of telling. This is really touching chapter and as I read your latest chapter I could see the action take place in my head with concrete imagery. I'd recommend chapter thirty to other reviewers as a 'must' read for any reader of drama and romance. I'd encourage you to keep moving forward with your entertaining romance fiction, my friend. I wish you a blessed 2012 New Years. BTW, I just got through eating a t-bone steak medium rare with homemade curly French fries, baked beans, A1 & Heinz 57 Sauce mixed along with a toasted garlic bread. It was scrumptious. I hope that teases you. Love ya...Melissa.

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    HUMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM, I love steak and medium rare is my favorite. I'm jealous. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from LisaMartino
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Being a newbie, I only read this one chapter, but I have to say it is filled with great insight into the characters' personalities. I got that Anna is self-conscious. I got that Troy is protective and strong. I also loved the story within the story; the telling of a past event. It is done well. I can see it happen. Great job.

 Comment Written 01-Jan-2012


reply by the author on 01-Jan-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.