Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 61 "part four, Chapter 18"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
65 total reviews
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Well done, Barbara. The tension in this chapter is thick as hell. What a monster Bobby is. You kept the whole episode true - no need to apologise for the language - I don't suppose for a moment a man like that would be using soft words. Great job. SWAT team? Oh, yes, Bobby's going down.
Excellent jog.
Hugs, Av
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Well done, Barbara. The tension in this chapter is thick as hell. What a monster Bobby is. You kept the whole episode true - no need to apologise for the language - I don't suppose for a moment a man like that would be using soft words. Great job. SWAT team? Oh, yes, Bobby's going down.
Excellent jog.
Hugs, Av
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review and your support of my writing.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
Barbara, you're building the tension beautifully. The six is for this whole sequence - can't find the single place to award it. Masterful. :) nancy
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Barbara, you're building the tension beautifully. The six is for this whole sequence - can't find the single place to award it. Masterful. :) nancy
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review and your support of my writing.
Comment from Nanette Mary
Hullo Barbara ...
Your description of the crude and brutal behaviour of Bobby is both well done and realistic. In this chapter, there are just a few small changes to recommend ...
* you have - The negotiator turned his direction. I suggest - turned in his direction (referring to Everett who had just spoken to him.)
* You have - is all right. In English-English, this is alright ....
* You have - she used a dish towel to dry. I suggest -
To dry herself, she used a dish-towel.
Thank you for sharing your fine writing us and also for your fine riting and for making known the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
Love from .... Nanette Mary.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Hullo Barbara ...
Your description of the crude and brutal behaviour of Bobby is both well done and realistic. In this chapter, there are just a few small changes to recommend ...
* you have - The negotiator turned his direction. I suggest - turned in his direction (referring to Everett who had just spoken to him.)
* You have - is all right. In English-English, this is alright ....
* You have - she used a dish towel to dry. I suggest -
To dry herself, she used a dish-towel.
Thank you for sharing your fine writing us and also for your fine riting and for making known the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
Love from .... Nanette Mary.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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According to my dictionary alright is not a word, it is all right. I will check the other areas. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from tango494
I loved this installation to your book. As with all your previous chapters that I have read I am always so impressed with your dialogues and narration skills. Excellent job!!!
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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I loved this installation to your book. As with all your previous chapters that I have read I am always so impressed with your dialogues and narration skills. Excellent job!!!
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Patrick G Cox
Hi Barbara
Oh dear, I'm feeling more and more un-Christian toward Bobby and his 'friends' - I'd like to personally string them up in public as a warning to others of their ilk.
Tsk, penance is what I'll end up doing ...
Well written, good building of the tension. I agree with George, this will end badly, hopefully for Bobby.
Patrick
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Hi Barbara
Oh dear, I'm feeling more and more un-Christian toward Bobby and his 'friends' - I'd like to personally string them up in public as a warning to others of their ilk.
Tsk, penance is what I'll end up doing ...
Well written, good building of the tension. I agree with George, this will end badly, hopefully for Bobby.
Patrick
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from rtobaygo
GREAT WORD FLOW.GOOD SENTENCE STRUCTURE AND SCENES. I DON'T KNOW IF MRS.. RODGERS IS A MAIN PROTAGONIST, AND I PRESUME ONE OR BOTH OF THE POLICE ARE. YOU'VE YOUR ANTAGONIST A PSYCHOPATH'S PERSONALITY AND YOU'VE DONE AN EXCELLENT JOB IN CREATING AN ATMOSPHERE WHERE YOU'RE NOT SURE WHETHER HE WILL KILL HER OR NOT. GOOD READ!
TAKE CARE,
RAY
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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GREAT WORD FLOW.GOOD SENTENCE STRUCTURE AND SCENES. I DON'T KNOW IF MRS.. RODGERS IS A MAIN PROTAGONIST, AND I PRESUME ONE OR BOTH OF THE POLICE ARE. YOU'VE YOUR ANTAGONIST A PSYCHOPATH'S PERSONALITY AND YOU'VE DONE AN EXCELLENT JOB IN CREATING AN ATMOSPHERE WHERE YOU'RE NOT SURE WHETHER HE WILL KILL HER OR NOT. GOOD READ!
TAKE CARE,
RAY
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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THANK YOU FOR YOUR KIND REVIEW AND CONTINUED SUPPORT OF MY WRITING.
Comment from squid152
Bobby is quite the..............................................................................hot head...............................
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Bobby is quite the..............................................................................hot head...............................
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Shirley McLain
The chapter is full of intensity and compels you to keep reading to the very end. You once again have outdone yourself and I'm look forward to the next chapter.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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The chapter is full of intensity and compels you to keep reading to the very end. You once again have outdone yourself and I'm look forward to the next chapter.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from jadapenn
There is such violence in this chapter it was hard to read. I can only hope Anna eventually escapes and the police get to shoot this criminal who kicks her around so much.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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There is such violence in this chapter it was hard to read. I can only hope Anna eventually escapes and the police get to shoot this criminal who kicks her around so much.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from robina1978
Bobby is such a nasty piece of work. Maybe all this would not have happened if victims like Anna got warning about their abusive partner's release.
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Bobby is such a nasty piece of work. Maybe all this would not have happened if victims like Anna got warning about their abusive partner's release.
Comment Written 09-Apr-2012
reply by the author on 09-Apr-2012
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Thank you for the kind review.