Reviews from

Lonely Hearts Meet

Viewing comments for Chapter 69 "part five, Chapter 20"
Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.

75 total reviews 
Comment from WilliamDeen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good write and addition to the story. No nits or spags noticed and nothing to suggest for changes. Thanks for sharing. Keep reading & writing.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from whispering fox
Excellent
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its a very vivid story and or chapter.the setting and the contents were well done.the visitation was pleasant,and i'm glad that anna awoke.i hope i'd find out later in future chapters that anna stops the repression!

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from guinea
Excellent
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Good writing . The story is getting more intense. I really like Troy and Anna. The words are flowing so well. I only found one error. Look at the sentence that reads: Troy returned the room. Should be "to the room".

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from LadyTreana
Excellent
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I always enjoy your writing it's so descriptive and fun to read. The writing flows so nicely and catches your attention right away, so that interest is not lost. Good writing.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from rtobaygo
Excellent
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SMOOTH MOVEMENT FROM SCENE TO SCENE. EXCELLENT DIALOGUE AND INTERACTION BETWEEN CHARACTERS. EXCELLENT DILEMMA FOR THE PROTAGONISTS TO CONSIDER IN THE NOW AND UPCOMING FUTURE.

TAKE CARE,

RAY


 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    THANK YOU FOR YOUR KIND REVIEW AND CONTINUED SUPPORT.
Comment from nora arjuna
Excellent
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After she indicated she would, Troy [went into the room] - suggest 'Troy returned to the room..'

no other nits to mention. so anna will be out and that's a relief. :)

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for suggesting that. I like ti better.
Comment from bookishfabler
Excellent
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Yeah, she's going home. Another wonderful chapter with no nits or spags that I can see. Thanks for sharing. Catch you on the next one
hugs
heidi

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
reply by bookishfabler on 04-Jun-2012
    you're welcome
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
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What relief to know Anna has come to at last..

Dialogue flowed naturally and I so enjoyed a happy ending to the chapter.


Troy and Paul entered Anna's room, but Anna hadn't returned from the tests - here, since you've already told the reader it's Anna's room, there's no need for the 2nd "Anna" - "she" will work just as well.

Most enjoyable, Barbara.

Margaret

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    I will remove that. I was wondering about it. It seemed understood to me, but I have had some reviewers that seems to not know whats going on.
reply by Margaret Snowdon on 04-Jun-2012
    I don't think every one reads carefully - I can always understand what's going on in your story, it's clear enough. M
Comment from sunnilicious
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

part five, Chapter 20 by barbara.wilkey

Surrounded by so much love and still domestic violence occurs. Troy (and Paul) the lifesaver. I'm not sure how to handle the situation either. Very glad his concern is real. It's shown when he asked to speak with the doctor. Nice work.

Baby kittens... they must be adorable. Congratulations.

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Jen Gentry
Excellent
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Barbara
I have had hours of therapy for abuse and my therapist and I decided that I have a swiss cheese type of memory it is a solid memory and I know my past but there are some holes in there that I cannot account for repressed memories you bet they do exist. Great chapter.
Jenny

 Comment Written 04-Jun-2012


reply by the author on 04-Jun-2012
    Wow, thank you for the insight. I appreciate the kind review.