Reviews from

Along the Jericho Road

Viewing comments for Chapter 55 "Sunka Moon, Part 1"
Murder Mystery

56 total reviews 
Comment from Gungalo
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It sounds as if Ty will have to do some protecting of Det. Jana, eh? Well once again I have bounced in on a great story that seems to go on forever. Forgive me girl for not keeping up.

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Gungalo, thank you so much for this gracious review. I appreciate you stopping by. :0) Bev
reply by Gungalo on 25-Feb-2014
    Smile girl.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    I am! xx
reply by Gungalo on 25-Feb-2014
    That's so good girlie.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    You're sweet, Gungalo. xx
reply by Gungalo on 25-Feb-2014
    Sighhhhhhh
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dear Bev, - this is a riveting read - and had me spooked - great writing, it both scares the heck out of me and yet I want more to read. Great smooth transitions from thought to spoken word of Ty. Smooth read and your imagery was wonderful too. Sure glad I didn't read this at night.
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Thank you so very much, Maureen. I really appreciate your insights into the chapter and encouragement. I'm so glad you found the read 'smooth'. Love, Bev
Comment from c_lucas
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It looks as if the killer thinks he is in full control and your are planning a showdown. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words.
ERROR:
He threw in (it) across the room

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Charlie, thanks for the sharp eye and the very generous review. I very much appreciate you hanging in with this novel. Means a lot to me. :0) Bev
reply by c_lucas on 25-Feb-2014
    You're welcome, Bev. Charlie
Comment from Rosalyne
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi, Bev.
Wow! What a chapter! This is excellent. I found myself hanging off of every word. The encounter on the bridge is excellent, written with such amazing visual details. I could feel Ty's fear, see him reaching for his gun, and the cold that wrapped around him, even through his clothing. The dog-wolf hybrid is so well shown, using the two colours. Great symbolism using this creature as a warning of doom. I've heard the calls of wolves in the wild. It is such a beautiful, but can also be such an eerie sound in the dead of the night. The ending of this chapter is a nail biter. I can't wait to read the next chapter!! Awesome read!
Bye
Hugs
Rosalyne :)

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Thank you so very much, Rosalyne. I'm absolutely thrilled with yoru insights into this chapter. It's a struggle for me sometimes to try to come up with something fresh in the horror category. The painted warrior came up in a show I was watching and morphed into the devil dog. Though there's different interpretations for the warrior's colors depending on the tribe, generally the ones I've used, red and white, are true for most.

    You're wonderfully generous six is icing on the cake my so-gracious friend.

    Hugs, Bev
Comment from robina1978
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Jana tries if her uncle will come back, as he might also be in danger. Then the police man Ty crosses with a devil dog. The somebody wants to go to Tony and have Jana out of the way. Good chapter.

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Ine, thank you so much for your continued interest in reading my chapters. Means a lot to me. Warm regards, Bev
Comment from Showboat
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Holy cow, Bev, that was really scary. It's amazing how words, in the right hands, can evoke the shivers even though nothing violent actually happens. I was waiting for the wolf to jump through the windshield, and then the car wouldn't start, oh boy, heart thumps.

Excellent job, not a thing to change that I saw and poor Tony. I don't think he's a happy camper right now.

Here's a sixer!

Hugs,
Gayle

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Gayle, I'm thrilled by your words of encouragement. I do find myself trying to evoke psychological fear more than outright violence, so your thoughts on that mean a lot to me! And thank you for the very generous sixer. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Joy Graham
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Awesome chapter full of suspense and intrigue. I like the visual of his boots touching the ground. Yours is one of the few things I'm following these days. I'm taking a break from fanstory. Not sure if I will catch your next chapter. Keep writing my friend. You have loads of talent for this type of writing!

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Joy, I'm really honored that you took the time to read my chapter. And I understand your need for some time out from the site. You've been a great support all along, and I couldn't ask for more than that. Thanks for the very generous rating and inisights, my friend. Hugs, Bev
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

your description sets the scene so well, Bev - I could see him driving along and slowing down over the bridge and feel the surprise when the animal suddenly appeared. So creepy.

and the poor dog - and now the beast has Tony


way its eyes bored into his was - fancy this should be "bore" into his

sound of an animal in terrible pain.- You left me wondering about this - as surely, with its throat ripped apart and entrails spilling from the dog's gut, it would be dead!!

Capice, redboy?(")

Glad I have a six for you - so deserved, my friend.

Margaret

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Margaret, thank you so very much for this terrific review and rating. You've made some good points and I've tweaked accordingly... so thanks for that as well. Warmest regards, Bev
Comment from Adri7enne
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Fascinating stuff. You've got a good tolerance for violence. LOL! Some of your scenes leave me a bit shivery. I'm such a chicken shit. I close my eyes at scary movies. LOL!

I followed Ty all the way, though. Good death scene with Wasu. Poor thing!

You took me there and wrung me out. I was hiding behind you all the way. You've got some scary characters in there. Brrr! Well done, Bev. Hurry with the next one.

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Thank you so very much, Adrienne. I'm thrilled with your insights into this chapter, though it was beyond your comfort level. Writing horror is surprisingly difficult if you want to keep a balance between the psychological and physical. That was my goal with this chapter, and, hopefully I succeeded.

    Your support, as always, means a lot to me, my friend. Thanks also for the generous sixer.

    Hugs, Bev
reply by Adri7enne on 25-Feb-2014
    You did super great! I know it must require a tight grip and intense focus. That's why it's so hard to write. Talent, my friend. That's what makes the difference. Whew! Well done, indeed.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Aw, thanks for that, Adrienne. Words like yours make it all worth while. XX Bev
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

You are such a good writer, Bev. This chapter emphasizes your skill at painting a scene.

The devil-dog was chillingly presented--excellent foreshadowing. The "man" that kidnapped Tony seems to be demonic. What human would or would be able to rip open a dog's throat?

We are in dangerous territory now. I suspect this chapter sets up the the story for its dramatic end. Lots to follow, however. I am eagerly awaiting the next chapter.

Perfect artwork to accompany this post. Superbly penned, Bev.

 Comment Written 25-Feb-2014


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2014
    Marietta, thank you for this wonderful review and your generous six star rating. I, especially, appreciate your taking time to point out what you liked in the chapter. That's so helpful! Tears flowed as I wrote about Wasu's death. I had a very special feeling for that hound, one shared by my character, Tony. And, you're right on target about the importance of this chapter.

    Hugs, Bev