Brave Robert
A Cautionary Tale56 total reviews
Comment from kiwijenny
Tony, this is one of your best poems...my grandfather was a gunner in World War Two...he had medals but never discussed them...I applaud your poem .....his eye stayed dry but he was drowned.... Most chilling line and I think descriptive of many who came home from war.
God bless
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Tony, this is one of your best poems...my grandfather was a gunner in World War Two...he had medals but never discussed them...I applaud your poem .....his eye stayed dry but he was drowned.... Most chilling line and I think descriptive of many who came home from war.
God bless
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thanks, Jenny. Can't tell you how much I appreciate this review. Your opinion means a great deal to me.
Comment from adewpearl
My father served in the Pacific during WWII - he was usually a story teller, like, one who never stopped spinning tales about his experiences, but not one word about the war, which I know he was in because I have his discharge papers...
solid rhyming couplets
good alliteration in phrases like were wept, cheerful chap
toys of war for Christmas gifts to operating actual tanks - that is a powerful stanza
good alliteration in banter in the barrack
a moving story of this man's war experiences
and how he locked them all up inside
Brooke
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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My father served in the Pacific during WWII - he was usually a story teller, like, one who never stopped spinning tales about his experiences, but not one word about the war, which I know he was in because I have his discharge papers...
solid rhyming couplets
good alliteration in phrases like were wept, cheerful chap
toys of war for Christmas gifts to operating actual tanks - that is a powerful stanza
good alliteration in banter in the barrack
a moving story of this man's war experiences
and how he locked them all up inside
Brooke
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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I appreciate your engagement with this one, Brooke. Many of us have somewhat similar stories, I think.
Comment from Domino 2
Great respect to your brave and decorated father, Tony.
I've read so many stories of these soldiers who rarely or never relate their harrowing experiences.
Incredibly moving poem of how he took on board his parents' advice, but I think we ALL need to cry sometimes to relieve the emotional pressure.
Terrific rhyme and meter, apart from the amazing personal tone and atmosphere, make this a special read.
Here's a well-deserved sixer, my friend.
Best wishes, Ray
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Great respect to your brave and decorated father, Tony.
I've read so many stories of these soldiers who rarely or never relate their harrowing experiences.
Incredibly moving poem of how he took on board his parents' advice, but I think we ALL need to cry sometimes to relieve the emotional pressure.
Terrific rhyme and meter, apart from the amazing personal tone and atmosphere, make this a special read.
Here's a well-deserved sixer, my friend.
Best wishes, Ray
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thank you, Ray. I appreciate your comments about my father, your engagement with my poem and your 6-star rating.
Comment from Dean Kuch
This is a cautionary poetic tale on a couple of levels, Tony. Number one, it is not wise to bottle up your emotions, and contrary to popular belief, it takes a real man to cry. When you keep everything locked up inside of you, you're likely to explode. The second is the horrors of war and the dire consequences that they have on humanity. While I'll agree that there are some things worth fighting for, it is always such a shame it has to come to that.
This well rhymed poem tells a sad tale of just one young man, and there were countless others just like him.
Great work!
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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This is a cautionary poetic tale on a couple of levels, Tony. Number one, it is not wise to bottle up your emotions, and contrary to popular belief, it takes a real man to cry. When you keep everything locked up inside of you, you're likely to explode. The second is the horrors of war and the dire consequences that they have on humanity. While I'll agree that there are some things worth fighting for, it is always such a shame it has to come to that.
This well rhymed poem tells a sad tale of just one young man, and there were countless others just like him.
Great work!
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thanks, Dean. I appreciate your close reading and interpretation of my poem.
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The pleasure was all mine, 'T'. :}
Comment from RGstar
Even though with his form, the rhymes come quickly and if not good the body of poetry the rhymes become invisible. Not so in this write, Tony. A good AABB construction with a healthy thesis.
Familiar with barrack life for a wee while, I could easily adjust to the write.
Well done.
RGstra
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Even though with his form, the rhymes come quickly and if not good the body of poetry the rhymes become invisible. Not so in this write, Tony. A good AABB construction with a healthy thesis.
Familiar with barrack life for a wee while, I could easily adjust to the write.
Well done.
RGstra
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Many thanks, RG. I chose the form to parallel the Cautionary Tales for children so popular in Victorian and Edwardian times - the kind of stories many of the young WW1 soldiers might have grown up with. I appreciate your observations about the form and your six star review.
Comment from Nosha17
A beautiful poem, the simplest words and imagery can convey the deepest thoughts. He must have been a brave man, your father. It is often better to let the tears flow as, like you said, he was drowned in pent emotion. Lovely lines which tell a story and convey deepest emotion. Great rhyming and illustration, most enjoyable. Faye
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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A beautiful poem, the simplest words and imagery can convey the deepest thoughts. He must have been a brave man, your father. It is often better to let the tears flow as, like you said, he was drowned in pent emotion. Lovely lines which tell a story and convey deepest emotion. Great rhyming and illustration, most enjoyable. Faye
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Many thanks, Faye . I chose the simple form to parallel the Cautionary Tales for children so popular in Victorian and Edwardian times. Many of the soldiers that died in the 14-18 war were little more than children. So glad to hear that you found it effective and thanks very much for the six stars and your kind words.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Tony, this is a lovely poem. I like the way you have tackled the war thing. To start off by telling us Robert's story from childhood, just a cute little boy like most, doing all the little things boys do, you led us gently into the young man who went off to war and was drowned. So many young men, just like Robert, some rushing off to enlist in case they missed the war that was going to be over by Christmas, Ha! My God, how thankful I am that my sons have missed the horrors of war. I like the way you only brought that in at the very end of your poem. That was clever. It made more impact, on me anyway, than a poem about 'blood and guts' which is written without real understanding. But I do like reading the war poets, Wilfred Owen, Sassoon and the like. I hate the glorification of war. I need to stop I'm starting to rant. My dad was killed in the second world war. This was a good read and love the way you told the story. Kind regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Tony, this is a lovely poem. I like the way you have tackled the war thing. To start off by telling us Robert's story from childhood, just a cute little boy like most, doing all the little things boys do, you led us gently into the young man who went off to war and was drowned. So many young men, just like Robert, some rushing off to enlist in case they missed the war that was going to be over by Christmas, Ha! My God, how thankful I am that my sons have missed the horrors of war. I like the way you only brought that in at the very end of your poem. That was clever. It made more impact, on me anyway, than a poem about 'blood and guts' which is written without real understanding. But I do like reading the war poets, Wilfred Owen, Sassoon and the like. I hate the glorification of war. I need to stop I'm starting to rant. My dad was killed in the second world war. This was a good read and love the way you told the story. Kind regards Dorothy
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thank you so much for your sensitive and thoughtful review of my poem, Dorothy. I modelled the form on the Cautionary Tales for children, popular in Victorian and Edwardian times. So many of those who died in the 14-18 war were scarcely more than boys, so I thought that appropriate.
Comment from Kenneth Schaal
I don't know which way works best, depends on the individual I guess. I know both kinds and all suffer. Your dad was old school and stuck to it. I just read a free verse mocking rhyme and meter, they should read this. Kenny
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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I don't know which way works best, depends on the individual I guess. I know both kinds and all suffer. Your dad was old school and stuck to it. I just read a free verse mocking rhyme and meter, they should read this. Kenny
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thanks,Kenny. I modelled the form on the Cautionary Tales for children, popular in Victorian and Edwardian times. So many of those who died in the 14-18 war were scarcely more than boys, so I thought that appropriate.
Comment from Andrewajgblue
A great poem of men not showing emotion, as they have been brought up to feel it's wrong and weak, it's such a shame! maybe men with depression and mental issues would be lower if they were able to show emotion ? A lovely well rhymed poem I really enjoyed it and a great subject matter,
Andrew
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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A great poem of men not showing emotion, as they have been brought up to feel it's wrong and weak, it's such a shame! maybe men with depression and mental issues would be lower if they were able to show emotion ? A lovely well rhymed poem I really enjoyed it and a great subject matter,
Andrew
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Many thanks for your review, Andrew. I couldn't agree more.
Comment from c_lucas
War is something that should be avoided if one wants a peaceful life. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words. Very good imagery.
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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War is something that should be avoided if one wants a peaceful life. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words. Very good imagery.
Comment Written 17-Aug-2014
reply by the author on 17-Aug-2014
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Thanks for your review, Charlie. Appreciated!
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You're welcome, Tony. Charlie