Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "old cowboys"A book of Poetry & Writing
65 total reviews
Comment from bhogg
To me, your best poem. Poetry is so personal, but there is one line where I think less could be more.
Between the working days and late, late nights her life was so insane (I'd drop was so and just leave her life insane). I'm not a poet, so maybe that is the writer side of me wanting to chop. In any event, a great read!
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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To me, your best poem. Poetry is so personal, but there is one line where I think less could be more.
Between the working days and late, late nights her life was so insane (I'd drop was so and just leave her life insane). I'm not a poet, so maybe that is the writer side of me wanting to chop. In any event, a great read!
Comment Written 12-May-2010
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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thank you bhogg i'm not a poet i just write,
Comment from prophetess
Excellent poem, great message, strong verses, so spag, no typos, good presentation, and the artwork frames the piece perfectly. Good job. Thank you for sharing your art with us.
Prophetess
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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Excellent poem, great message, strong verses, so spag, no typos, good presentation, and the artwork frames the piece perfectly. Good job. Thank you for sharing your art with us.
Prophetess
Comment Written 12-May-2010
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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thank you Prophetess for reading
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you're welcome
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is a very emotional poem. You did a wonderful job writting it. You have nice descriptions. It flows smoothly and was easy to read. I didn't stumble over any lines or words.
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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This is a very emotional poem. You did a wonderful job writting it. You have nice descriptions. It flows smoothly and was easy to read. I didn't stumble over any lines or words.
Comment Written 12-May-2010
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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thank you barbara
Comment from fictionwriter
You really need a girl who enjoys that sort of live to have the ranch not get in between them. I guess that cowboy should have picked me. LOL. Great job.
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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You really need a girl who enjoys that sort of live to have the ranch not get in between them. I guess that cowboy should have picked me. LOL. Great job.
Comment Written 12-May-2010
reply by the author on 13-May-2010
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thank you fictionwriter
Comment from Pili Pubul
Excellent my friend , I told you this before but may be difficult to marry a cowboy specially if comes from a different background.
The trials and tribulations that make us who we are
The teaching from our fathers that carry us this far
The heartaches we must carry to make it day by day
The love from that woman, he lost along the way
reply by the author on 12-May-2010
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Excellent my friend , I told you this before but may be difficult to marry a cowboy specially if comes from a different background.
The trials and tribulations that make us who we are
The teaching from our fathers that carry us this far
The heartaches we must carry to make it day by day
The love from that woman, he lost along the way
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 12-May-2010
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thank you Pili
Comment from Sefiros
I am impressed that you were able to keep up the continous rhyming and make a statement at the same time. I remember my first poems and how i had to buther the english language to make it rhyme. The fourth stanza did break the rhythm of the poem. You might want to rework it or get rid of it completely. Nice job and looking forward to the next one.
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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I am impressed that you were able to keep up the continous rhyming and make a statement at the same time. I remember my first poems and how i had to buther the english language to make it rhyme. The fourth stanza did break the rhythm of the poem. You might want to rework it or get rid of it completely. Nice job and looking forward to the next one.
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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thank you for your comments
Comment from c_lucas
Somewhere along in life, we must evaluate our lives. This is very well written with very good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good job.
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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Somewhere along in life, we must evaluate our lives. This is very well written with very good imagery and descriptive scheme. Good job.
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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thank you C_lucas
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You're welcome, Gary. Charlie
Comment from Dom G Robles
I like your poem deepwater. It is full of rhymes and rhythm. I like best the two stanzas: Rich houses and the finer side was not what he has planned--Both tried to close that gap in life but came in deferent (different) worlds."
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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I like your poem deepwater. It is full of rhymes and rhythm. I like best the two stanzas: Rich houses and the finer side was not what he has planned--Both tried to close that gap in life but came in deferent (different) worlds."
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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thank you for reading Dom
Comment from Judi
Dear Deepwater:
This was just so nostalgic! Not that I am from that era --it's just that so many stories have gone by the wayside, about the cowboy and his lot in life, that we forget from whence we came!
I liked this piece so much for many reasons -- first and foremost, the fact is I loved that era. (Of course, television romanticized it a lot!) But life back then was so hard and wearing on not only your body, but your soul.
You did so well with this poem! The only (very slight!) suggestion I can make, is to change the spelling from 'deferent' worlds to 'different worlds'. Most likely it was that darn keyboard -- it does tend to have a mind of its own! Actually, only one adjustment that I can see. so I gave you 4 stars when it should have been 5. Judi
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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Dear Deepwater:
This was just so nostalgic! Not that I am from that era --it's just that so many stories have gone by the wayside, about the cowboy and his lot in life, that we forget from whence we came!
I liked this piece so much for many reasons -- first and foremost, the fact is I loved that era. (Of course, television romanticized it a lot!) But life back then was so hard and wearing on not only your body, but your soul.
You did so well with this poem! The only (very slight!) suggestion I can make, is to change the spelling from 'deferent' worlds to 'different worlds'. Most likely it was that darn keyboard -- it does tend to have a mind of its own! Actually, only one adjustment that I can see. so I gave you 4 stars when it should have been 5. Judi
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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thanks judi change made
Comment from Peter@Poole
This is the second of your poems that I've reviewed today, again enjoying the atmosphere that you create. Rhyming is good and the metre is smooth, telling a poignant story. 'Ridding' must be a typo. Peter
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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This is the second of your poems that I've reviewed today, again enjoying the atmosphere that you create. Rhyming is good and the metre is smooth, telling a poignant story. 'Ridding' must be a typo. Peter
Comment Written 11-May-2010
reply by the author on 11-May-2010
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thank you peter for reading