Lonely Hearts Meet
Viewing comments for Chapter 41 "Part two, Chapter 13"Anna and her son escape from a man-made Hell.
64 total reviews
Comment from Roberta Joan Jensen
this chapter sent chills all up and down my back and along my arms.
Anna released a deep breath[comma after a "before" introductory clause, but not before it when it ends the sentence] before she and Troy entered the red-brick building.
Troy wiped [I tear]. "I understand."
Have fun at your Thanksgiving dinner.
Roberta
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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this chapter sent chills all up and down my back and along my arms.
Anna released a deep breath[comma after a "before" introductory clause, but not before it when it ends the sentence] before she and Troy entered the red-brick building.
Troy wiped [I tear]. "I understand."
Have fun at your Thanksgiving dinner.
Roberta
Comment Written 20-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Thank you for your well wishes and for your detailed review. I appreciate the help.
Comment from Gungalo
Funny how something that is so wrong can make us feel so sad and blue. To cry for feeling this way is awful but necessary I think. She'll be okay. I know it!!
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Funny how something that is so wrong can make us feel so sad and blue. To cry for feeling this way is awful but necessary I think. She'll be okay. I know it!!
Comment Written 20-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Still gracefully and deeply emotional writing.
I could see the lead up to this but loved how you got Anna to start to see the real truth settle.
Great flow, imagery and a sense of ease when Anna breaks down. I`ve waited for it like the popping of the cork in a bottle of wine. Nicely penned my friend. Had me in tears too.
Overall proceeding and filling all what I expect with the plot at this stage.
Great job.
Maureen
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reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Still gracefully and deeply emotional writing.
I could see the lead up to this but loved how you got Anna to start to see the real truth settle.
Great flow, imagery and a sense of ease when Anna breaks down. I`ve waited for it like the popping of the cork in a bottle of wine. Nicely penned my friend. Had me in tears too.
Overall proceeding and filling all what I expect with the plot at this stage.
Great job.
Maureen
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from adewpearl
Your shirt's all wet - add the apostrophe for contraction of shirt is
We can go to my parents' - add apostrophe for plural possessive
Troy is one wonderful, patient, empathetic guy. Do you think you could create a guy like him for me? LOL :-) Have a fantastic thanksgiving gathering :-) Brooke
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reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Your shirt's all wet - add the apostrophe for contraction of shirt is
We can go to my parents' - add apostrophe for plural possessive
Troy is one wonderful, patient, empathetic guy. Do you think you could create a guy like him for me? LOL :-) Have a fantastic thanksgiving gathering :-) Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2011
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Thank you for your eagale eye. You deserve a man equal to Troy, I will see what I can do.