Chronicles of the Wandering Man
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Terra Sanctum, A Shadow on the Grey"An extended story in poem form
106 total reviews
Comment from Max Edon
I thought that this poem was just plain great! The world you described was so vivid. This was a pretty long poem ,but you had the form just perfect. Congratulaions on completing such an wonderful poem! poem!
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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I thought that this poem was just plain great! The world you described was so vivid. This was a pretty long poem ,but you had the form just perfect. Congratulaions on completing such an wonderful poem! poem!
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Max. I'm so glad you enjoyed the read and took them time to leave me your fantastic comments :-)
Mike
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You are welcome!
Comment from Triple P
Absolutely wonderful. I wish I could give this 6 stars, but the sight hasn't let me for several days now. It kept me captivated throughout. I love the repititions of the first line in XXX.
I'm looking forward to more.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Absolutely wonderful. I wish I could give this 6 stars, but the sight hasn't let me for several days now. It kept me captivated throughout. I love the repititions of the first line in XXX.
I'm looking forward to more.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Triple. Yes, 6ers get refunded on Sunday, so tactically I released this a day early, but never mind. It's the amazing comments I'm most interested in, so thanks for those, and for taking the time to read.
Mike
Comment from Gideon Roth
Hi there. Wow, this was an intense poem but addresses a serious and real-time issue. The poem flowed well and conveyed this important message in an entertaining manner. Good job...Gideon
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Hi there. Wow, this was an intense poem but addresses a serious and real-time issue. The poem flowed well and conveyed this important message in an entertaining manner. Good job...Gideon
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Gideon. I'm so glad you enjoyed the read.
Mike
Comment from RaymondJohn
You must have heard Billie Hallidays's Strange Fruit. Dismal scene, and you have it down perfect. Strong imagery. I can envision a world such as this and mourn my grandchildren's fate. Best wishes. Ray
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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You must have heard Billie Hallidays's Strange Fruit. Dismal scene, and you have it down perfect. Strong imagery. I can envision a world such as this and mourn my grandchildren's fate. Best wishes. Ray
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Ray. Yes, the repeating line is certainly a knowing reference to the song, which I hope gives it some extra depth and imagery. Glad you enjoyed it, my friend!
Mike
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello fleedleflimp
A very bleak poem looking what it could be when the Earth is fading away after so much radiation and so many wars.
I just wonder if this should read --
The Wandering Man reaches his conclusion
instead of--
The Wandering Man reaches its conclusion.
Gert
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Hello fleedleflimp
A very bleak poem looking what it could be when the Earth is fading away after so much radiation and so many wars.
I just wonder if this should read --
The Wandering Man reaches his conclusion
instead of--
The Wandering Man reaches its conclusion.
Gert
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Gert, and good point about the description line. I shall change that with grateful thanks :-)
Mike
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Smiles Mike
Gert
Comment from jlsavell
Fleedleflump, truly I am speechless. I would bestow with with more stars than five if i had them. This is true poetry, enthralling, captivating, perfect rhythm, cadence, rhyme. It carried the reader down the page forcefully. Love it..I must go back and read the other chapters. What a brilliant writer you are!! This work almost reminds me of Dave M's work in prose. He has a wandering man in the bowels of hell..Bill Smith. truly mesmerizing your work!!!!
Is not the last 5 stanzas a song????
jlsavell
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Fleedleflump, truly I am speechless. I would bestow with with more stars than five if i had them. This is true poetry, enthralling, captivating, perfect rhythm, cadence, rhyme. It carried the reader down the page forcefully. Love it..I must go back and read the other chapters. What a brilliant writer you are!! This work almost reminds me of Dave M's work in prose. He has a wandering man in the bowels of hell..Bill Smith. truly mesmerizing your work!!!!
Is not the last 5 stanzas a song????
jlsavell
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, jlsavell :-). I got my initial idea from a recurring character in Simon R Green's novels called the Walking Man - a mad zealot who strolls the worlds right perceived wrongs. Of course, my character's not quite as nutty! THank you for your simply awesome review :-)
The phrase I've used in the repeating line 'strange fruit' is a song about bodies linched by the KKK and left hanging in poplar trees, so it was an intentional reference :-)
Mike
Comment from Amicus
Terrific poetry...but for an occasional metrical blip, it flows beautifully as it unfolds revealing a compelling and chilling apocalyptic tale in rich figurative language that is sensually satisfying and makes for a memorable reading experience. Good stuff.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Terrific poetry...but for an occasional metrical blip, it flows beautifully as it unfolds revealing a compelling and chilling apocalyptic tale in rich figurative language that is sensually satisfying and makes for a memorable reading experience. Good stuff.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Amicus. I really appreciate the great review :-)
Mike
Comment from RITETAB
Very powerful imagery - your words paint a mental image of stark bleakness very vividly.
Definitely a six :-)
Huh? I don't get this FS!!! Its quite stupid, in my opinion, to count words as a measure of a reviews' quality -so what? You forced me to type all this extra nonsense just to pat yourself on the back that the reviewer was MADE to give a more meaningful comment while actually I did not add a WORD more - for I had said everything I had to say so why force me to be verbose????
;-) SORRY Mike - please excuse my rant above - quite spontaneous and unplanned - but honestly, I loved your poem!
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Very powerful imagery - your words paint a mental image of stark bleakness very vividly.
Definitely a six :-)
Huh? I don't get this FS!!! Its quite stupid, in my opinion, to count words as a measure of a reviews' quality -so what? You forced me to type all this extra nonsense just to pat yourself on the back that the reviewer was MADE to give a more meaningful comment while actually I did not add a WORD more - for I had said everything I had to say so why force me to be verbose????
;-) SORRY Mike - please excuse my rant above - quite spontaneous and unplanned - but honestly, I loved your poem!
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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lol, I completely agree with the rant, so no worries at all. I'm hugely greatful for the sixer and, as you say, such a rating speaks volumes on its own. Not all reviews need to be exhaustive :-)
Mike
Comment from Connie P
This is brilliant, although very dark, and also possibly prophetic. Your poems here are perfect in rhyme and hold a lilting rhythm. It's sobering, but should be beheld as a classic work of art.
Connie
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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This is brilliant, although very dark, and also possibly prophetic. Your poems here are perfect in rhyme and hold a lilting rhythm. It's sobering, but should be beheld as a classic work of art.
Connie
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Connie. What an amazing comment, and one I'll put on the inside book cover in the unlikely event this ever gets poublished :-) I'm so glad you enjoyed the read!
Mike
Comment from TT7Z
Very interest view point of what may be our future. It is quite a dark piece, yet intriguing to say the least. Some spots I had to read and re-read to get the understanding and flow. Overall this chapter is a great piece. And yes I will read and rate the other chapters. Again thank you for this piece and not leave us hanging, man.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Very interest view point of what may be our future. It is quite a dark piece, yet intriguing to say the least. Some spots I had to read and re-read to get the understanding and flow. Overall this chapter is a great piece. And yes I will read and rate the other chapters. Again thank you for this piece and not leave us hanging, man.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2010
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Thank you :-). This series has been a long time in completion, but it's been hugely rewarding to write. I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and feel inspired to read more!
Mike