Icicle
strange encounter12 total reviews
Comment from Mary Vigasin
You gave me chills in this unusual story. It is weird but I can picture your ice creature as a real being.
Bring in the virus to even destroy your creature shows that even this eternal creature is vulnerable to the virus.
Well done.
Mary
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You gave me chills in this unusual story. It is weird but I can picture your ice creature as a real being.
Bring in the virus to even destroy your creature shows that even this eternal creature is vulnerable to the virus.
Well done.
Mary
Comment Written 23-Nov-2020
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello,
I love your flash fiction.... Great entry for the Short Story Writing Prompt contest. You managed to write a complete story in a few words, that's harder than it seems.
I love the pandemic story with a twist. Sometimes death is better.
Well done!
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Hello,
I love your flash fiction.... Great entry for the Short Story Writing Prompt contest. You managed to write a complete story in a few words, that's harder than it seems.
I love the pandemic story with a twist. Sometimes death is better.
Well done!
Comment Written 23-Nov-2020
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Creepy story; stunning ending!
It had been one thousand years [omit comma] since she was buried in this cave.
She hated this perpetual cycle [semicolon vs comma] there was no one left who understood her.
typo: were ar it again s/b were at it again
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Creepy story; stunning ending!
It had been one thousand years [omit comma] since she was buried in this cave.
She hated this perpetual cycle [semicolon vs comma] there was no one left who understood her.
typo: were ar it again s/b were at it again
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from BethShelby
This is a creative twist that I sure hasn't been thought of. This Icicle figure lives only one a year but does see the point of awakening because she is alone and man kind is dying. The virus itself with grant the wish of the Ice figure but causing it not to awake again. DId you mean to shift the beaver moon to a bear moon?
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This is a creative twist that I sure hasn't been thought of. This Icicle figure lives only one a year but does see the point of awakening because she is alone and man kind is dying. The virus itself with grant the wish of the Ice figure but causing it not to awake again. DId you mean to shift the beaver moon to a bear moon?
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A very inventive story which sent a chill down my spine both from this icy figure and from the virus that has already killed so many, much enjoyed, very entertaining, love Dolly x
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A very inventive story which sent a chill down my spine both from this icy figure and from the virus that has already killed so many, much enjoyed, very entertaining, love Dolly x
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from James Crofoot1
awesome stuff!
Didn't see any mistakes. Loved how her prayers were answered.
peace
ps not much else. except I loved it. the immortality regret is always a cool story.
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awesome stuff!
Didn't see any mistakes. Loved how her prayers were answered.
peace
ps not much else. except I loved it. the immortality regret is always a cool story.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from Rosemary Everson1
The curse in this story is the virus and the ice covered lady who will never see the light of day....She will die and never walk this earth again because of this dreadful uncontrollable disease.
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The curse in this story is the virus and the ice covered lady who will never see the light of day....She will die and never walk this earth again because of this dreadful uncontrollable disease.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from Jasmine Girl
Yes. Covid19 likes cold and this icicle is a perfect match for it. Oh. Not. Icicle wanted to die so virus can help.
I found a typo:
Now, those crazy humans were ar it again. ->
Now, those crazy humans were at it again.
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Yes. Covid19 likes cold and this icicle is a perfect match for it. Oh. Not. Icicle wanted to die so virus can help.
I found a typo:
Now, those crazy humans were ar it again. ->
Now, those crazy humans were at it again.
Comment Written 21-Nov-2020
Comment from humpwhistle
An interesting story about a supernatural character. I made a note of a couple grammatical errors--there are others. Also, you switch tenses a few times. I hope you'll edit this.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
November's Beaver moon hung low in the night sky, the icicle figure open her eyes and stretched her legs. --I think this is two sentences. I'd put a period after sky.
the icicle figure open--should that be 'opened'?
The virus creped behind -- creeped
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2020
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An interesting story about a supernatural character. I made a note of a couple grammatical errors--there are others. Also, you switch tenses a few times. I hope you'll edit this.
Best of luck.
Peace, Lee
November's Beaver moon hung low in the night sky, the icicle figure open her eyes and stretched her legs. --I think this is two sentences. I'd put a period after sky.
the icicle figure open--should that be 'opened'?
The virus creped behind -- creeped
Comment Written 20-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2020
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Thank you so much Lee for the corrections, I think I posted at midnight:)
Comment from Susan X Smith
This little story shows creativity and originality. The picture is quite striking and unique. This piece is an excellent contest entry, meeting all the requirements.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2020
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This little story shows creativity and originality. The picture is quite striking and unique. This piece is an excellent contest entry, meeting all the requirements.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Nov-2020
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2020
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Thank you:)