Disobeyed
an essence poem22 total reviews
Comment from Mary Vigasin
Congratulations! Getting recognition for a very powerful poem. Those who buck rules or society norms pay a harsh price. Smart choice of the picture to complement your words.
Best wishes
Mary
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2022
Congratulations! Getting recognition for a very powerful poem. Those who buck rules or society norms pay a harsh price. Smart choice of the picture to complement your words.
Best wishes
Mary
Comment Written 27-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2022
-
Thank you, Mary
Comment from jaded831
Congratulations!! I read the winners and out of the bunch although you didn't take first, I found yours the best. It was truthful, easy to understand, and relatable, all the ingredients for a great poem.
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2022
Congratulations!! I read the winners and out of the bunch although you didn't take first, I found yours the best. It was truthful, easy to understand, and relatable, all the ingredients for a great poem.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2022
-
Thank you, Jaded
Comment from dragonpoet
Bill,
These words and artwork match well. It shows that we can become almost captives of our mistakes. Disobeying rules causes us much pain in the end.
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2022
Bill,
These words and artwork match well. It shows that we can become almost captives of our mistakes. Disobeying rules causes us much pain in the end.
Congrats on placing second in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy
Joan
Comment Written 25-Mar-2022
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2022
-
Thank you, Joan
-
You're welcome, Bill.
Joan
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
There is much truth in these words Bill. Rules that have been tried and tested and are there for the good of everyone are often broken by foolish people, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
There is much truth in these words Bill. Rules that have been tried and tested and are there for the good of everyone are often broken by foolish people, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Thanks, Dolly
Comment from kahpot
ahh! this good, your internal rhyme is so very clever and the message you have packed in this little poem is powerful, very well written and presented, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
ahh! this good, your internal rhyme is so very clever and the message you have packed in this little poem is powerful, very well written and presented, best wishes for your contest****kahpot
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Thanks, kahpot, for the excellent review. Bill
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Your contest entry plus image pair nicely. I enjoyed reading your poem and agree with your words. Good job with the syllable count per line and the rhymes.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Your contest entry plus image pair nicely. I enjoyed reading your poem and agree with your words. Good job with the syllable count per line and the rhymes.
Best wishes in the contest.
Respectfully, Jan
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Thank you, Jan
Comment from BethShelby
Nice two line poem. The rules are usually there for our protection and breaking them can often cause accidents and other serious consequences. The foolish find themselves in trouble often when they chose to break them.
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Nice two line poem. The rules are usually there for our protection and breaking them can often cause accidents and other serious consequences. The foolish find themselves in trouble often when they chose to break them.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
We have fools to prove the rule.
Comment from judiverse
Great thought in this. You managed to get in your internal rhyme smoothly! Best of luck in the contest. Fools are inclined to disobey the rules. Maybe they just want to test the system. Great artwork choice. judi
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Great thought in this. You managed to get in your internal rhyme smoothly! Best of luck in the contest. Fools are inclined to disobey the rules. Maybe they just want to test the system. Great artwork choice. judi
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Thank you, Judi
-
You're welcome. judi
Comment from juliaSjames
Brilliant, Bill. I can think of adjectives to qualify "fools" but maybe you chose the wiser course.
I've tried writing essence poems and given up. Your internal rhyme of "made/disobeyed" is sheer genius.
Best of luck with the Contest Committee.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
Brilliant, Bill. I can think of adjectives to qualify "fools" but maybe you chose the wiser course.
I've tried writing essence poems and given up. Your internal rhyme of "made/disobeyed" is sheer genius.
Best of luck with the Contest Committee.
Stay safe and blessed
Julia
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 27-Feb-2022
-
Thank you, Julia
Comment from Dawn Munro
Goodness, I must find more time to spend at FanStory, I must! You certainly have a talent for these tiny formats, my friend. Once again you show how it's done! Good luck with this gem.
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2022
Goodness, I must find more time to spend at FanStory, I must! You certainly have a talent for these tiny formats, my friend. Once again you show how it's done! Good luck with this gem.
Comment Written 26-Feb-2022
reply by the author on 26-Feb-2022
-
Thank you so much, Dawn.
-
You are welcome. :)