Woe of the Underwood
The cursed contraption won't let me go...65 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
Ah, somehow I missed this contest and this little gem of a story. An evil possessed typewriter consuming the author. Gives new meaning to those all night cramming sessions to get the story down before it goes away. I think my parents have one of those old underwoods in the attic. Not so sure I want to find out.
Great character development though the narration. The well placed few words from the ancient typewriter add just the right touch of terror to make this truly creepy.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Ah, somehow I missed this contest and this little gem of a story. An evil possessed typewriter consuming the author. Gives new meaning to those all night cramming sessions to get the story down before it goes away. I think my parents have one of those old underwoods in the attic. Not so sure I want to find out.
Great character development though the narration. The well placed few words from the ancient typewriter add just the right touch of terror to make this truly creepy.
Comment Written 02-Apr-2014
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Thanks for dusting this one off and having a look at it for me, Debi. I'm really glad you liked it. It got slaughtered in the Ghost Story contest, 9 votes to 6, but it sure was a heck of a lot of fun to write!
Comment from Ronhorrorfan
I liked this story very much and was written very well. It reminded me something of a cross between "The Tommyknockers" and H.P. Lovecraft.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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I liked this story very much and was written very well. It reminded me something of a cross between "The Tommyknockers" and H.P. Lovecraft.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2014
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Hah, well, if it reminded you of Stephen King and H.P. Lovecraft, that makes me feel pretty damn good, lol.
Thanks for the excellent review, Ronhorrorfan.
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
How spooky is this! I had a very old Underwood once, and was so annoyed to find my husband had given it away to one of his mates without asking me first - perhaps it's just as well he did!!!!
Piper Street - cap S
bestselling or best-selling
Immediately, after making the buy, I'd asked him what events warranted the machine being haunted? - this isn't actually a question, but you mentioning what you asked - thus no question mark.
behind it's insatiable need - its
Good luck with the contest, Dean - you should walk away with the prize for this.
Margaret
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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How spooky is this! I had a very old Underwood once, and was so annoyed to find my husband had given it away to one of his mates without asking me first - perhaps it's just as well he did!!!!
Piper Street - cap S
bestselling or best-selling
Immediately, after making the buy, I'd asked him what events warranted the machine being haunted? - this isn't actually a question, but you mentioning what you asked - thus no question mark.
behind it's insatiable need - its
Good luck with the contest, Dean - you should walk away with the prize for this.
Margaret
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks so much for the constructive feedback, Margaret. I truly appreciate that! All those mistakes have been corrected.
I'm also glad that you found the story spooky. I tried not to go too over the top with this one.
As for the contest, well ... it ended two days ago, and I lost, 9 voted to 6. Still, it was a fun story to write, and I never recalled seeing a story about a haunted typewriter before.
Comment from James Chaima Phiri
This story truly sends shivers in the reader.
How can one live with such a machine in the same house!
This is a wonderful story from a wonderful creative author.
No errors noticed. Sweet flow of the story.
What?
Am I being threatened? Why should I send the message again? This is horror at its best.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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This story truly sends shivers in the reader.
How can one live with such a machine in the same house!
This is a wonderful story from a wonderful creative author.
No errors noticed. Sweet flow of the story.
What?
Am I being threatened? Why should I send the message again? This is horror at its best.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, James, that's a great compliment, I'm very honored. I appreciate the review, and I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
Comment from shaffer40
I loved this story, perfectly-written and gripping from start to finish. In terms of construction, I liked the author's method of placing pertinent, dramatic lines off to themselves, such as "Damn thing types itself" and the statements made by the Underwood (love the title as well). I enjoyed the descriptive mentions--"mechanical beast" and "satanic symphony" for example. The concept of being unable to rid himself of the obviously possessed machine brings to mind Burnt Offerings, an underrated movie of the 1970s, in which resident family members become one with a haunted house and, in inevitable death, become its extensive alumni. One believes and hopes that, unlike that house's certain death sentence, this author will live intertwined with his newfound metal companion, totally perplexed and tortured, but alive nonetheless, so he can write more deliciously cryptic tales for our entertainment. (Note: the name of his book, The Ferryman, is not italicized.)
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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I loved this story, perfectly-written and gripping from start to finish. In terms of construction, I liked the author's method of placing pertinent, dramatic lines off to themselves, such as "Damn thing types itself" and the statements made by the Underwood (love the title as well). I enjoyed the descriptive mentions--"mechanical beast" and "satanic symphony" for example. The concept of being unable to rid himself of the obviously possessed machine brings to mind Burnt Offerings, an underrated movie of the 1970s, in which resident family members become one with a haunted house and, in inevitable death, become its extensive alumni. One believes and hopes that, unlike that house's certain death sentence, this author will live intertwined with his newfound metal companion, totally perplexed and tortured, but alive nonetheless, so he can write more deliciously cryptic tales for our entertainment. (Note: the name of his book, The Ferryman, is not italicized.)
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thank you very much, shaffer40, I'm very glad you enjoyed this story. I've seen Burnt Offerings, and you're right, it never got the credit it truly deserved. Great movie.
I really appreciate you taking time out to read & review this for me, and I certainly am grateful to you for all those lovely stars, lol!
Take care, my friend, and pleasant screams.
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You're welcome, Dean. Just in case you'd like to see it, I have a story in the November issue of Serving House Journal,
http://www.servinghousejournal.com/ShafferEndofWorld.aspx
Comment from dmt1967
'You might know the place, although the name (is escaping) me at the moment. I would write (escaped) great story my friend good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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'You might know the place, although the name (is escaping) me at the moment. I would write (escaped) great story my friend good luck in the contest and thank you for sharing
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks, dmt1967. I took your advice, and I made some changes. I really appreciate your feedback.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Learnt to type on just such a typewriter, not haunted though. Great way you introduce us to Frederick. Great story, and a great ending WE R 1. Frederick got a best seller but wouldn't be around to appreciate it. I really enjoyed this thriller.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Learnt to type on just such a typewriter, not haunted though. Great way you introduce us to Frederick. Great story, and a great ending WE R 1. Frederick got a best seller but wouldn't be around to appreciate it. I really enjoyed this thriller.
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks very much, Pearl. I'm happy that you took a look at it, and appreciate your kind remarks and generous review.
Comment from Ekim777
Horror stories always intrigue me. As a kid I was easily frightened, turning so many objects into ghostly personifications. Even a raised voice could make me shiver. Need I mention that I tended to isolation, as does any creative person. I suspect our writer is of similar bent. Introducing even the suggestion of humour is a master stroke after all horror like humour depends on carrying things to their extreme. So we are introduced to our hero and the protagonist is a haunted or haunting typewriter. Why not so; Carl Jung, that crazy psychiatrist said man is more frightened of machines than of natural death. The final sentence is masterful. It certainly tripped me up. -Ekim777
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Horror stories always intrigue me. As a kid I was easily frightened, turning so many objects into ghostly personifications. Even a raised voice could make me shiver. Need I mention that I tended to isolation, as does any creative person. I suspect our writer is of similar bent. Introducing even the suggestion of humour is a master stroke after all horror like humour depends on carrying things to their extreme. So we are introduced to our hero and the protagonist is a haunted or haunting typewriter. Why not so; Carl Jung, that crazy psychiatrist said man is more frightened of machines than of natural death. The final sentence is masterful. It certainly tripped me up. -Ekim777
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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I'd guess we are of similar ilk, Ekim777. As with all situations, even the most horrifying in real life as well as imagined, I've always tried to find the humor in a particular situation. Granted, it's not always there, but I try.
I'm very familiar with the quote by Mr. Jung. Ironic you should mention it because I almost used it in the opening quote at the beginning of the story, but went with Charles Dickens instead.
I certainly appreciate your fabulous review and the most generous rating. All are sincerely appreciated.
Comment from Sanku
hello, that was a brilliant story.This reminded me of Edgar Allan Poe"s writing. you have graphically built up tension in the readers and smoothly it flows into a climax from which there is no resolution.I have an idea why don,t you have a contest and ask readers to come up with a flashback for the typewriter.I am sure some dead writers soul is still locked up there !I am sorry I ran out of my sixes.So here they are ******
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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hello, that was a brilliant story.This reminded me of Edgar Allan Poe"s writing. you have graphically built up tension in the readers and smoothly it flows into a climax from which there is no resolution.I have an idea why don,t you have a contest and ask readers to come up with a flashback for the typewriter.I am sure some dead writers soul is still locked up there !I am sorry I ran out of my sixes.So here they are ******
Comment Written 29-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thank you, Sanku, I hadn't thought about a contest about it ... but that's definitely an idea. You don't think readers would find that a bit conceited on my part to create a contest centering around a story I'd written myself? I worry about things like that here. Some feel I'm already a little standoffish and calloused, although I don't try to come across that way.
In any event, it's something to think about, and I certainly appreciate your very kind review.
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WEll!, I am not sure of that .but i have noticed in this site that the readers are very fond of spooky and eerie stuff .so this could be a challenge .But then I am not sure of the rules of this site .or better still, you could continue this with a flash back!
Comment from literature*geek
Awesome story! I love how you made it feel like the reader might be from the same town as the narrator and that he seems to be attempting to connect with the reader (the repeated use of "you may have hears of it"). The steady decent into madness was great. The only thing that could possibly be added to the story would be more detail. Not Tolkien three pages about the character's feet detail, but just a little more description. Other than that, I reiterate, awesome story!
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Awesome story! I love how you made it feel like the reader might be from the same town as the narrator and that he seems to be attempting to connect with the reader (the repeated use of "you may have hears of it"). The steady decent into madness was great. The only thing that could possibly be added to the story would be more detail. Not Tolkien three pages about the character's feet detail, but just a little more description. Other than that, I reiterate, awesome story!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 28-Mar-2014
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2014
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Thanks for taking the time to read & review this story for me, LG. I appreciate it.