I Swear It's The Truth
Contest Entry-The First Page7 total reviews
Comment from amada
Congratulations in winning the contest! Your story, full of details, innuendos and cat litter filled my curiosity. For sure, I would buy the book.
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Congratulations in winning the contest! Your story, full of details, innuendos and cat litter filled my curiosity. For sure, I would buy the book.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
Comment from Twilightspire
This is definitely an interesting start. It has everything you need to begin a novel. You start with immediate action. A conscious choice to draw us into further reading. No wasted words.
The dialogue is all over the place and incredibly realistic, so it helps to pull you into what is going on. The descriptions are specific enough to picture and don't bog you down with unnecessary details.
Overall, it's a novel I would read if you plunked it down in front of me.
Great job.
-T.J.
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This is definitely an interesting start. It has everything you need to begin a novel. You start with immediate action. A conscious choice to draw us into further reading. No wasted words.
The dialogue is all over the place and incredibly realistic, so it helps to pull you into what is going on. The descriptions are specific enough to picture and don't bog you down with unnecessary details.
Overall, it's a novel I would read if you plunked it down in front of me.
Great job.
-T.J.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
Comment from Lovinia
Hi Mikey
WOW! What a blast. Almost a whole story, or several in the first chapter. :))) Exciting stimulating, so fast paced and you build so well to your conclusion. Hysterical dark humour. "Truthful Jones" - fabulous character name ... and sure seems he will make a great character as he develops. Very clever wit and such mastery in your writing. I love this and it could go on to be a fabulous story..... I can't imagine anyone reading and not screaming for the next page.
I really enjoyed your description of Chester and Truthful's cat tale. Poor family in the Mobil Home ... I guess you'll get to them. Hahahah!
Love the bizarre cop entrance ...... "drawn service revolvers" ... came at me right out of the 'blue'. The title is brilliant, the image AND, a great story. An outstanding piece of writing Mikey. I can see why it was the winner ... sorry I missed the vote .... yours for sure. You really have great talent. A dazzler right from the first word, "Stink?" ... lol. I would love to see this one developed .... just how many ideas can you keep in that head of yours. Great work.
PS I found a pair of sunglasses the same as yours ... so we must be twins separated at birth by aliens ....... or before that????? LOL
Huge hugs for a wonderful win and a super chapter. Lovi xoxoox
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Hi Mikey
WOW! What a blast. Almost a whole story, or several in the first chapter. :))) Exciting stimulating, so fast paced and you build so well to your conclusion. Hysterical dark humour. "Truthful Jones" - fabulous character name ... and sure seems he will make a great character as he develops. Very clever wit and such mastery in your writing. I love this and it could go on to be a fabulous story..... I can't imagine anyone reading and not screaming for the next page.
I really enjoyed your description of Chester and Truthful's cat tale. Poor family in the Mobil Home ... I guess you'll get to them. Hahahah!
Love the bizarre cop entrance ...... "drawn service revolvers" ... came at me right out of the 'blue'. The title is brilliant, the image AND, a great story. An outstanding piece of writing Mikey. I can see why it was the winner ... sorry I missed the vote .... yours for sure. You really have great talent. A dazzler right from the first word, "Stink?" ... lol. I would love to see this one developed .... just how many ideas can you keep in that head of yours. Great work.
PS I found a pair of sunglasses the same as yours ... so we must be twins separated at birth by aliens ....... or before that????? LOL
Huge hugs for a wonderful win and a super chapter. Lovi xoxoox
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
Comment from reconciled
Brilliant.......I mean slapped at attention...wow...homage paid my brother. Your start.....freakin' superb....no way you're leaving...the ending...no way you don't come back...-headshake-...genius......that's the first time I've called someone that....love michael
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Brilliant.......I mean slapped at attention...wow...homage paid my brother. Your start.....freakin' superb....no way you're leaving...the ending...no way you don't come back...-headshake-...genius......that's the first time I've called someone that....love michael
Comment Written 19-Apr-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
Hahaha!!!!! This is one of the funniest damn things I have read in a long time!!! Him going on about the cat when the officer really wanted to know about the murders was classic!! Has my vote. NG
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Hahaha!!!!! This is one of the funniest damn things I have read in a long time!!! Him going on about the cat when the officer really wanted to know about the murders was classic!! Has my vote. NG
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014
Comment from Dean Kuch
Good old Truthful Jones (excellent name, by the way!), has an explanation and a story for everything, didn't he, ha ha? So, the schizophrenic cat did it, slaughtered the family in the AirStream behind the bar. At least, that's the story that Truthful is feeding the cops, but I doubt very much they'd buy that one. Of course, forensic sciences being what they are today, it would take too long to corroborate his story, or discount it altogether.
Anyhow, this was an excellent first page to a story, and really clever, funny one at that. I happen to like dark humor, and this one had that, and more!
Well done, and good luck to you in the contest.
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Good old Truthful Jones (excellent name, by the way!), has an explanation and a story for everything, didn't he, ha ha? So, the schizophrenic cat did it, slaughtered the family in the AirStream behind the bar. At least, that's the story that Truthful is feeding the cops, but I doubt very much they'd buy that one. Of course, forensic sciences being what they are today, it would take too long to corroborate his story, or discount it altogether.
Anyhow, this was an excellent first page to a story, and really clever, funny one at that. I happen to like dark humor, and this one had that, and more!
Well done, and good luck to you in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014
Comment from mfowler
I'm not sure Truthful Jones will survive past the first page if the police officers don't take time to work him out. Let's just suppose he does and you have a great chapter emerging. TJ is a quintessential character, yarn spinner and stretcher of the facts. You really caight me off guard with a police intrusion and a mass murder in the alley, but, that's why this is so good. Good luck!
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I'm not sure Truthful Jones will survive past the first page if the police officers don't take time to work him out. Let's just suppose he does and you have a great chapter emerging. TJ is a quintessential character, yarn spinner and stretcher of the facts. You really caight me off guard with a police intrusion and a mass murder in the alley, but, that's why this is so good. Good luck!
Comment Written 18-Apr-2014