Comment from Schalk Jacobs

Excellent

Stupid, stupid man. However I suspect that when Nate loses his temper he goes in to a blind rage. Seems that had happened with Eva, in a way. The plot is thickening.

 Comment Written 22-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 22-Sep-2014

Thank you, Schalk. I don't know what to say. No one on here has ever do this. I really appreciate this.

Comment from Ric Myworld

Exceptional

Thanks for the pleasure of reading your outstanding chapter that kept me engrossed in the moment, wanting to strangle Margaret, and without sympathy for Nathan. Great read. :-)

 Comment Written 03-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 03-Sep-2014

Well, thank you, Ric, not just for the six stars, but for this fine encouraging review. It's people like you who make me work so hard at writing.

Comment from Selina Stambi

Excellent

Hello Harriett,

First I have to congratulate you. This is the best written chapter so far. The style is smooth and polished. Good dialogue, no unnecessary details, and excellent formatting.

As for Nate ... that man is playing with fire and he's a fool!

Look forward to the next chapter, dear.

Love,

Sonali :)

Margaret said, flowing towards him ... great line - very evocative



that what happened the other night, (couldn't) happen again.

Margaret had (c)hampagne chilling and

He rushed to her(,) grabbed her by (the) shoulders and shook her so hard, her

Margaret rolled over, still in a sleepy daze(,) and stretched. Nathan

Oh, God(,) what the hell am I going

rehearsed over and over in his (mind) what

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Yes, I meant to change brain to mind. Thanks so much.

Comment from onebrit

Excellent

So I guess he used to love her and is unable to resist her this time around. I feel very sorry for his wife. I liked the dialog, and the characters were well developed and believable. i will be interested to see what comes next....Im rooting for his wife!

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Thank you onebrit. So glad you started reading me.

Comment from Writingfundimension

Excellent

You have characters that really pull the reader in, Amahra. I'm sure those who've been following your novel will be delighted to see this well-crafted addition.

:) Bev

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Thank you so much Bev.

reply by Writingfundimension on 02-Sep-2014

You're very welcome!

Comment from Drew Delaney

Excellent

Wow! I don't usually care to read romance and betrayal but you sure got me on my toes. This is very well written, with a message of something like what a slut can do to a married man. Too bad that he still loves her, but I suppose this story is a love triangle. Very persuasive in your genre.

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Thank you so much Drew. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.

Comment from adewpearl

Excellent

You get inside Nathan's conflicted inner thoughts well
good natural-sounding dialogue that registers strong emotion well
I can feel Nathan's panic and desperation
Brooke

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Thank you Brook. I'm glad I was able to get those emotions across.

Comment from nancy_e_davis

Excellent

My first time reading your work. I like it very much. Thanks for the explanation at the beginning and the list of
characters at the end. I will fan you so I can keep up with the story. Good work. Nancy

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

Well, thank you Nancy, I'm flattered. I hope you will enjoy the remainder of the book.

Comment from robina1978

Excellent

I remember the story, maybe just missed the odd chapter. So I was pleased with your intro. Nathan can't decide which woman he loves: his wife and Margaret.

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

thank you robina.

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

Wow.....it's been a while since I read this......the other woman is right.....
This is going to destroy his life...his lover is selfish and cruel...how could he do this to his baby girl .................well written
God bless

 Comment Written 02-Sep-2014

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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2014

thank you kiwjenny.