Echoes of Artistry
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Living the Golden Rule"NaPoWriMo 2017
18 total reviews
Comment from honeytree
The art work is so
important for these words
We all have to learn about
loving others more toss away
the hate and the hurtful ways.
Our world is still learning
how to care and help others
how to stop wars, learning
to live our lives properly.
Honey tree
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017
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The art work is so
important for these words
We all have to learn about
loving others more toss away
the hate and the hurtful ways.
Our world is still learning
how to care and help others
how to stop wars, learning
to live our lives properly.
Honey tree
Comment Written 16-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 16-Apr-2017
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Hi Annie,
I appreciate your generous gift of this six star rating and review.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read and comment.
Kim
Comment from Rlegel99
Poem about doing unto others and saving the earth. Since the artwork is your inspiration it works very well. This poem flows as nicely. Thank you for sharing this piece of poetry.
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Poem about doing unto others and saving the earth. Since the artwork is your inspiration it works very well. This poem flows as nicely. Thank you for sharing this piece of poetry.
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Hi Rlegel:
Thank you for your time and review. I appreciate your comments.
Kim
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Wow Kim I don't know how you found the time to write this long, poem when we are writing and reviewing so much at the moment.
A very powerful speech on behalf of Mother Nature and the world at large. Good luck in the contest. Well done with this one.
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Wow Kim I don't know how you found the time to write this long, poem when we are writing and reviewing so much at the moment.
A very powerful speech on behalf of Mother Nature and the world at large. Good luck in the contest. Well done with this one.
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 15-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
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Hi Valda,
I spent a lot of time on this one yesterday. Once I got started on it, it really just began to flow. I was focused on the 500 word limit and pacing myself to get all I wanted to say in the piece. The contest was a good focus for a topic, especially after choosing Norman Rockwell's paintings of an idyllic culture as the inspiration for this piece.
Thanks for the lovely review.
Kim
Comment from CD Richards
But I don't want to be in a Norman Rockwell painting - I don't even like having my photo taken!
One thing I question:
"It's true; our World has lost touch with humanity,
don't waste your breath, it just can't be denied."
I think it's humanity that's lost touch with the world, not vice-versa.
That aside, your rhyme scheme is excellent. The subject matter covered is appropriate, and I like the concept that we just need to "take a walk" to open our eyes to what is going on around us. Not sure if it's the case there, but Prime Ministers and other senior politicians here love to be filmed taking their "daily walk" - I can only assume they do it with their eyes shut.
Well done, Kim. You've produced a fine piece for the contest, and I wish you luck!
Craig
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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But I don't want to be in a Norman Rockwell painting - I don't even like having my photo taken!
One thing I question:
"It's true; our World has lost touch with humanity,
don't waste your breath, it just can't be denied."
I think it's humanity that's lost touch with the world, not vice-versa.
That aside, your rhyme scheme is excellent. The subject matter covered is appropriate, and I like the concept that we just need to "take a walk" to open our eyes to what is going on around us. Not sure if it's the case there, but Prime Ministers and other senior politicians here love to be filmed taking their "daily walk" - I can only assume they do it with their eyes shut.
Well done, Kim. You've produced a fine piece for the contest, and I wish you luck!
Craig
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Craig,
I think that is probably ok, since Norman Rockwell died in the seventies. His paintings, however, reflect a range of activities in an idyllic manner. I can't help believing that we could use more of that innocence and wholesomeness back in our lives today. Certainly treating others the way we'd like to be treated couldn't be a bad thing.
Unfortunately, people tend to be thick headed and our world is overrun with greed and the "what's in it for me" mentality. Short of an event that threatens the entire planet, I'm not sure we'll ever all get on the same page. I'll agree with you, any way you slice it, humanity is out of touch.
Thank you for all the words of encouragement. Didn't you read my epigrams post at the beginning of the month? Politicians fly under the flag of an Ass... I just forgot to mention the 'head up their' part of their logo lol
Thank you for the awesome review.
Kim
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Hi Kim. I agree ... we've certainly lost touch with humanity. Much thought and effort went into the writing of this piece. It's terrific. Virtual six for this one!
This is an excellent entry for the Soapbox contest. Excellent rhyming and great flow. Love the artwork! Highlights for this reader:
- "We'll step away from screens, reacquainted, it seems"
- "To champion all life and be the seeders"
- love your "dwell/Normal Rockwell" rhyme
Good luck in the contest, Kim. Happy Easter weekend to you!
Connie
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Kim. I agree ... we've certainly lost touch with humanity. Much thought and effort went into the writing of this piece. It's terrific. Virtual six for this one!
This is an excellent entry for the Soapbox contest. Excellent rhyming and great flow. Love the artwork! Highlights for this reader:
- "We'll step away from screens, reacquainted, it seems"
- "To champion all life and be the seeders"
- love your "dwell/Normal Rockwell" rhyme
Good luck in the contest, Kim. Happy Easter weekend to you!
Connie
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Connie!
I created this contest with no real intention of entering. That came on a whim yesterday when I was pondering what to write. A virtual six is a wonderful gift any day of the week! Thank you so much for the glowing comments. I appreciate your feedback.
Happy Easter!
Kim
Comment from Elizabeth Daniels
Thank you for speaking for mother nature. Your poem makes a lot of good points. I also love that song...a good inspiration for anybody and of course you can never go wrong with an American icon like Norman Rockwell.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Thank you for speaking for mother nature. Your poem makes a lot of good points. I also love that song...a good inspiration for anybody and of course you can never go wrong with an American icon like Norman Rockwell.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Elizabeth,
Thank you for taking the time to read and review. I appreciate the lovely comments.
Kim
Comment from BeasPeas
This is a well written poem for your entry into the contest. Wouldn't it be something if everyone treated others the way they wished to be treated? Let's pray for that. Marilyn
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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This is a well written poem for your entry into the contest. Wouldn't it be something if everyone treated others the way they wished to be treated? Let's pray for that. Marilyn
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Marilyn:
Can you imagine where we would be? Can it be that simple? I think the world needs to be more about love and kindness (listen to the poets and writers) than about greed and power (the politicians) before we can make the strides to attain a better world. It is something to pray for, that is for sure. Thank you for the wonderful review.
Kim
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Unfortunately, not everyone is coming from the same place and never will be.
Comment from Pantygynt
This is a major poetic undertaking consisting of sixty lines of dramatic verse that preaches a philosophy of life in five parts, each of twelve lines rhyming alternately in four stanzas.
The are some interesting examples of double syllable, cleverly created rhymes that cry out to be included in a regular recurring meter but don't quite make it naturally. It is possible to read this with a regular rhythm by including pauses and breaks that bare not indicated by any form of punctuation. Any form of public presentation would require exceptional familiarity with the piece and a great deal of practice.
The regularity of the meter I am afraid makes this a very difficult poem to read aloud. Because of this I nearly gave this a our star grade but relented on the grounds of the difficult nature of the task you set yourself.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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This is a major poetic undertaking consisting of sixty lines of dramatic verse that preaches a philosophy of life in five parts, each of twelve lines rhyming alternately in four stanzas.
The are some interesting examples of double syllable, cleverly created rhymes that cry out to be included in a regular recurring meter but don't quite make it naturally. It is possible to read this with a regular rhythm by including pauses and breaks that bare not indicated by any form of punctuation. Any form of public presentation would require exceptional familiarity with the piece and a great deal of practice.
The regularity of the meter I am afraid makes this a very difficult poem to read aloud. Because of this I nearly gave this a our star grade but relented on the grounds of the difficult nature of the task you set yourself.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Pantygynt:
I hate my voice recorded, but my first instinct is to record this piece and send it to you. However, since I'm the author of the piece, I'll read it the way it came out of my head, so perhaps that defeats the purpose.
I appreciate your extensive comments. Prior to yesterday I had no real intention of entering this contest, and I'm the one that created it lol I'd have been better served to have done a prose piece, possibly, but since I needed a poem for NaPo, a poem it became. I had a smile over the regularity of the meter, as generally I'm more apt to be guilty of messing the meter up.
I do understand what you mean though. A piece written as Robert Service's, "The Cremation of Sam McGee," is excellent to read allowed because of the inflections of the language used in the poem. That would be especially good in a longer piece.
Thank you for the extensive comments and the generosity of your rating.
Kim
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Egg on my face. That was meant to read irregularity of the meter. Oops!
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no worries :)
Comment from dragonpoet
These abab quatrains tell of different problems that need to be solved to have the safe and loving/accepting world we all want. If we could just have peace that would make us more healthy because of the release of stress. You are right that we have to take better care of nature so we can stay alive.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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These abab quatrains tell of different problems that need to be solved to have the safe and loving/accepting world we all want. If we could just have peace that would make us more healthy because of the release of stress. You are right that we have to take better care of nature so we can stay alive.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Dragonpoet,
Thank you for taking the time to read and review this lengthy piece. Thank you for the kind and thoughtful comments.
Kim
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You're welcome, Kim.
Joan
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
Well done rant with a consistent rhyme scheme and thoughtful phrasing. It encompasses so much that needs to be addressed if we want to call ourselves humanity. Favorite:
We'll step away from screens, reacquainted, it seems,
with one another and our Mother Earth.
With hopes renewed, new skills ensue; we'll chase our dreams,
meanwhile, reveling in our planet's rebirth.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Well done rant with a consistent rhyme scheme and thoughtful phrasing. It encompasses so much that needs to be addressed if we want to call ourselves humanity. Favorite:
We'll step away from screens, reacquainted, it seems,
with one another and our Mother Earth.
With hopes renewed, new skills ensue; we'll chase our dreams,
meanwhile, reveling in our planet's rebirth.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2017
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Hi Wendy,
Thanks for taking the time to read and review this lengthy piece. I appreciate the thoughtful review.
Kim