Writings From the Heart
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Over the Top 1914 Eastern Front"A book of Poetry & Writing
238 total reviews
Comment from jadegrowing
WOW VERY OUT SPOKEN YOU SOUND I LIKE HAT IN A WRITER, SPEAK OUT WHAT YOU MEAN AND DON'T EVER HIDE, BECAUSE THAT STRENGTH WILL HELP YOU OVERCOME YOUR TOUGHEST FEARS.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2010
  |
WOW VERY OUT SPOKEN YOU SOUND I LIKE HAT IN A WRITER, SPEAK OUT WHAT YOU MEAN AND DON'T EVER HIDE, BECAUSE THAT STRENGTH WILL HELP YOU OVERCOME YOUR TOUGHEST FEARS.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2010
-
thank you for the comments Jade
Comment from hfriscia
This is a good poem to read...Very tight and easy to read...They way you written the poem, the soldier seems more like a poet, then a soldier...I have done something similar with knights and the crusade...But, can't figure how to write it in old english...
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2010
|
This is a good poem to read...Very tight and easy to read...They way you written the poem, the soldier seems more like a poet, then a soldier...I have done something similar with knights and the crusade...But, can't figure how to write it in old english...
Comment Written 06-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2010
-
thank you for the review
Comment from Mª Luisa López Pisú
MUY SENTIDO POEMA, MUY LOGRADO TUS VERSOS, EST? LLENOS DE SENTIMIENTOS Y DE RECUERDOS.
DE HACER CAMBIOS, CREO QUE S?, LE HIZO FALTA M?S EXTENSI?N DEL
VERSOS, EL TEMA DA PARA M?S.
SALUDOS DE DIN?MICA
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
MUY SENTIDO POEMA, MUY LOGRADO TUS VERSOS, EST? LLENOS DE SENTIMIENTOS Y DE RECUERDOS.
DE HACER CAMBIOS, CREO QUE S?, LE HIZO FALTA M?S EXTENSI?N DEL
VERSOS, EL TEMA DA PARA M?S.
SALUDOS DE DIN?MICA
Comment Written 06-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you for the review Maria
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi deepwater
Nice poem! Evil times... you are right! People don't know today, do they?
I like the picture as well... is it a church in France?
I might have said "What evil times has carnage picked" for rhythm.
And instead of "We are ready to make our stand", I might have said "Prepared to make a stand".
And finally, I would have used quotation marks and capitals (maybe) around "FIX BAYONETS".
But that's just me. It's a terrific poem. We need to remember the brave men that fell in the two great wars, as well as the ones who came back home!
Nicely done!
Kim
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
Hi deepwater
Nice poem! Evil times... you are right! People don't know today, do they?
I like the picture as well... is it a church in France?
I might have said "What evil times has carnage picked" for rhythm.
And instead of "We are ready to make our stand", I might have said "Prepared to make a stand".
And finally, I would have used quotation marks and capitals (maybe) around "FIX BAYONETS".
But that's just me. It's a terrific poem. We need to remember the brave men that fell in the two great wars, as well as the ones who came back home!
Nicely done!
Kim
Comment Written 06-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you Kim for the review and comments Gary
Comment from bowls
This is a very strong poem. The element of pathos is obvious in the reference to the wounds which "blister black". Excellent rhythm and the rhyme scheme is strong, reflecting the general tone of the entire piece.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
This is a very strong poem. The element of pathos is obvious in the reference to the wounds which "blister black". Excellent rhythm and the rhyme scheme is strong, reflecting the general tone of the entire piece.
Comment Written 06-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you bowls for the review
Comment from Isaiah Ramesses
Nice addition to your on going book, Gary. I love all things written concerning the World Wars--although I'm more knowledgable of the second.
For judgment on this land
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand>>great lines.
Good work with this.
Isaiah Ramesses
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
Nice addition to your on going book, Gary. I love all things written concerning the World Wars--although I'm more knowledgable of the second.
For judgment on this land
With scorn and tears we greet him here
We are ready to make our stand>>great lines.
Good work with this.
Isaiah Ramesses
Comment Written 05-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you Isaiah for this review Gary
Comment from animatqua
I thought this was powerful, dramatic, and---too short.
I checked at the top of the page to see where this was going. It looks to me like it is part of an epic poem. My comment remains the same. The subject is gripping. This alone will keep me reading it. Jerking from one segment to another, however, disorients me. It then makes me spend time getting back on track instead of getting immersed in the poem.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
I thought this was powerful, dramatic, and---too short.
I checked at the top of the page to see where this was going. It looks to me like it is part of an epic poem. My comment remains the same. The subject is gripping. This alone will keep me reading it. Jerking from one segment to another, however, disorients me. It then makes me spend time getting back on track instead of getting immersed in the poem.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thanks for the comments and review animatqua
Comment from LadyWave
You've done another great job with this poem. You have such strong and intense words that really stick with the reader and present a powerful image. Great work.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
You've done another great job with this poem. You have such strong and intense words that really stick with the reader and present a powerful image. Great work.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you Lady for this review
Comment from Eternal Muse
First, I want to compliment your excellent rhyming and meter. The subject matter was worthy to be resposted on a holiday. You recapture the times of 1914. I had a little hard time understanding
You tell us that our strength was sold
To help your country back
The whole poem is a little enigmatic; a bit of clarity would be in order (smile); but I loved it all around.
Thank you for sharing this with us, and the excellent image.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
First, I want to compliment your excellent rhyming and meter. The subject matter was worthy to be resposted on a holiday. You recapture the times of 1914. I had a little hard time understanding
You tell us that our strength was sold
To help your country back
The whole poem is a little enigmatic; a bit of clarity would be in order (smile); but I loved it all around.
Thank you for sharing this with us, and the excellent image.
Comment Written 05-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
your welcome thanks for the review
Comment from Judian James
What a powerful opening line "Our dead will mock the searing heat My wounds will blister black" so much carnage and suffering. Unfortunately, as long as there's mankind, there will be wars. well done
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
|
What a powerful opening line "Our dead will mock the searing heat My wounds will blister black" so much carnage and suffering. Unfortunately, as long as there's mankind, there will be wars. well done
Comment Written 05-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2010
-
thank you for the review and comments judian