Quiet Lawyer
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "Quiet Lawyer Chapter 16 C"Can a broken heart be mended?
26 total reviews
Comment from lancellot
Good writing and editing.
You know, it's odd a professional and lawyer wouldn't automatically mention when a person is on speaker and someone else is in room before speaking.
Alexandra reached for her purse. "I'd better check. To be honest, I rarely need it."
- Really? She's been driving, flying from NYC, in and out of court, dealing with cops, filing legal paperwork, she's a lawyer (who seems to handle all forms of law) etc...
"Have you ever had any {problems?
"}
-edit
"Sounds good[."]
-edit
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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Good writing and editing.
You know, it's odd a professional and lawyer wouldn't automatically mention when a person is on speaker and someone else is in room before speaking.
Alexandra reached for her purse. "I'd better check. To be honest, I rarely need it."
- Really? She's been driving, flying from NYC, in and out of court, dealing with cops, filing legal paperwork, she's a lawyer (who seems to handle all forms of law) etc...
"Have you ever had any {problems?
"}
-edit
"Sounds good[."]
-edit
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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She doesn't use her driver's license in NYC, she has a driver. Matter-of-fact, I rarely use my driver's license. I do know exactly where my military ID is.
As for being on speaker, she was talking to her mom, I can understand the oversite. I will make the corrections ASAP. Thank you for the kind review.
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She was picked up at the airport. How did she fly from NYC without a license? Yes, she could have used a passport but she didn't fly international, and she doesn't mention a passport here. Also, she was driving the SUV. She would've been asked for ID by the police and the courts.
I thought about her talking to her mom, but I figured as a super lawyer such a thing would be second nature.
It is a good chapter.
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She flew in her family's private jet. She wouldn't need ID. She drove Rosa SUV and Rosa wouldn't ask to see her driver's license. In small courthouses they don't ask for ID's. You need to think small town. It's not the same. I've lived in large cities and in small towns, both in Europe and in the US.
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Okay. If you feel that fits her character.
Comment from judiverse
I hope they won't have any trouble at the checkpoint. Amy seems ready to follow through with everything Ali's arranged for her. She deserves to have some good things happening. It's a good idea to have someone help her with her college application, etc. Ali had clout, when she chooses to use it. I hope there aren't any unexpected problems for Ali. Pat probably has his eye out for any way he can stop her. judi
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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I hope they won't have any trouble at the checkpoint. Amy seems ready to follow through with everything Ali's arranged for her. She deserves to have some good things happening. It's a good idea to have someone help her with her college application, etc. Ali had clout, when she chooses to use it. I hope there aren't any unexpected problems for Ali. Pat probably has his eye out for any way he can stop her. judi
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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Pat will cause problems for Ali as will her ex. I can promise both. Thank you for the kind review.
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You're welcome. I'll be waiting for that. I was wondering if he ex would make an appearance. judi
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he will
Comment from royowen
Wow! What an episode. I do like your protagonists, they have great character, and I do like your approach to the general writing process, and the ideals you hold to. It's a great tradition you're upholding, and this world needs an example of what holds a country together, it's not its riches, its achievements, but in its kindness, ideals and humanity, and quite frankly it's lost its way, just a few good people can put it back together, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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Wow! What an episode. I do like your protagonists, they have great character, and I do like your approach to the general writing process, and the ideals you hold to. It's a great tradition you're upholding, and this world needs an example of what holds a country together, it's not its riches, its achievements, but in its kindness, ideals and humanity, and quite frankly it's lost its way, just a few good people can put it back together, blessings Roy
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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I agree with those values. Without them we are nothing. Thank you for the wonderful encouragement.
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Yep you?re right Barbara
Comment from John Ciarmello
This is a feel-good chapter, Barbara. I enjoyed it. I'm sorry you're having trouble with the editor. The font size isn't a problem, and I don't see that well, lol. Nice job! Best, JohnC
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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This is a feel-good chapter, Barbara. I enjoyed it. I'm sorry you're having trouble with the editor. The font size isn't a problem, and I don't see that well, lol. Nice job! Best, JohnC
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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Thank you for the kind review and glad the font size is acceptable.
Comment from Sankey
I think this might have been a longer chapter than you normally do. Great reading all the same. No spags and I looked for more drama and glad there was none.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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I think this might have been a longer chapter than you normally do. Great reading all the same. No spags and I looked for more drama and glad there was none.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2022
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Thank you for the kind review. It was about 1600 words. I've done longer. LOL
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No worries it was a very good read.
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
You solved the problem in a very interesting way, and made it seem more certain Alex will become a bride and a Texas lawyer. She could be a "force to be reckoned with" in Texas just as well as in New York. One thing you might want to change: . . . compl(e)ment (on) each other.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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You solved the problem in a very interesting way, and made it seem more certain Alex will become a bride and a Texas lawyer. She could be a "force to be reckoned with" in Texas just as well as in New York. One thing you might want to change: . . . compl(e)ment (on) each other.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Thank you for the catch. I have made the correction. I appreciate your help.
Comment from amahra
Writing about sexual abuse or any tragedy facing us today is never easy; Perhaps this is why I prefer writing fictional fantasy, supernatural, and sci-fi. But you seem to do well in this genre.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Writing about sexual abuse or any tragedy facing us today is never easy; Perhaps this is why I prefer writing fictional fantasy, supernatural, and sci-fi. But you seem to do well in this genre.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very well done. The story is progressing.
The phone call from Mom - Since you are putting so much in, it sounded as if Cord was neglecting to learn why his mother called in the first place. He should ask.
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Very well done. The story is progressing.
The phone call from Mom - Since you are putting so much in, it sounded as if Cord was neglecting to learn why his mother called in the first place. He should ask.
Best wishes.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Maybe, he should. LOL Thank you for the kind review. I figure he knew she wanted to know how things were going.
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click/disconnect. "But Son! I'm havin' a heart attack!" lol
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lol You're sweet.
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I need to add. His response to his mom calling is very similar to the response I get from my sons when I call. I have four.
Comment from BethShelby
I enjoyed this. Ali was really able to make things start to happen for Amy. You show her to be a very compassionate person. It sounds as though she could have become a victim herself because the guy she dated in New York was getting away with treating her with less respect than she deserved.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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I enjoyed this. Ali was really able to make things start to happen for Amy. You show her to be a very compassionate person. It sounds as though she could have become a victim herself because the guy she dated in New York was getting away with treating her with less respect than she deserved.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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We'll find out more about him, very soon. Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This was an enjoyable chapter to read, even though there was little tension. All your characters behaved with compassion or gratitude, showing their good sides only. Kate xx
Potential SPAGs for your consideration:
the use of their computers and the use of a printer > the use of their computers and a printer
after that check > after that, check
Before, getting out > Before getting out
Shouldn't. I'll declare > Shouldn't be. I'll declare
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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This was an enjoyable chapter to read, even though there was little tension. All your characters behaved with compassion or gratitude, showing their good sides only. Kate xx
Potential SPAGs for your consideration:
the use of their computers and the use of a printer > the use of their computers and a printer
after that check > after that, check
Before, getting out > Before getting out
Shouldn't. I'll declare > Shouldn't be. I'll declare
Comment Written 07-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2022
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Thank you for the catches. I appreciate the help.
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welcome
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Thank you for the catches. I appreciate the help.