Another Pretty Face
Viewing comments for Chapter 11 "Chapter 4, part three"Can love survive small town gossip?
72 total reviews
Comment from rama devi
Tender and sweet. What a gentleman Joe is. Good dialog as always. Haven't kept up with all chapters (sorry, dear, i was off line and am also reviewing much less than before).
Did not notice any nits in first read and scanned your reviews....the few typos were noted already.
Glad you changed the scooteds.
Warm smiles,
rd
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Tender and sweet. What a gentleman Joe is. Good dialog as always. Haven't kept up with all chapters (sorry, dear, i was off line and am also reviewing much less than before).
Did not notice any nits in first read and scanned your reviews....the few typos were noted already.
Glad you changed the scooteds.
Warm smiles,
rd
Comment Written 11-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Yes, I have made the changes people have suggested. I have missed you and am glad to hear from you.
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Missed you too! WIll be reviewing less for some weeks---busy with numerous projects...including free lance editing too. Hugs,r d
Comment from Allezw2
Lady barbara wilkey,
Six stars for an indomitable spirit.
Some high schools here started yesterday. My classes at the CC are next week. It's always fun to see everyone again, comparing notes on their summers.
Live long and write well,
Fantasist
For your consideration:
- "Fair question. I get up around five-thirty and do PT[,] that's physical training.
- I run down information on drug cartel movements[;] basically I'm just a watch dog."
I don't believe you need a semi-colon here. They are two independent clauses and could therefore be two sentences.
- against her [soft back].
In the spirit of the moment, as mildly erotic, perhaps it could be [the soft skin of her back]?
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Lady barbara wilkey,
Six stars for an indomitable spirit.
Some high schools here started yesterday. My classes at the CC are next week. It's always fun to see everyone again, comparing notes on their summers.
Live long and write well,
Fantasist
For your consideration:
- "Fair question. I get up around five-thirty and do PT[,] that's physical training.
- I run down information on drug cartel movements[;] basically I'm just a watch dog."
I don't believe you need a semi-colon here. They are two independent clauses and could therefore be two sentences.
- against her [soft back].
In the spirit of the moment, as mildly erotic, perhaps it could be [the soft skin of her back]?
Comment Written 11-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your help with those. I will make the corrections. I appreciate your kind review.
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You are quite welcome.
Comment from nora arjuna
Hmm, loads of kisses going on in here lol. He's such a tender loving guy. In fact all your heroes are around their ladies. Again sorry to learn about your health issues. Please take care and don't stress yourself.
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Hmm, loads of kisses going on in here lol. He's such a tender loving guy. In fact all your heroes are around their ladies. Again sorry to learn about your health issues. Please take care and don't stress yourself.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 11-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your concern. I appreciate your kind review.
Comment from Jonez08
Another glance into the land of sweetness, seems these two are really becoming acquainted and Sarah, dispite her reluntance to let go finds it impossible to resist Joe. I hope he doesn't shatter her world too much. Look forward to the next
Cassandra
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Another glance into the land of sweetness, seems these two are really becoming acquainted and Sarah, dispite her reluntance to let go finds it impossible to resist Joe. I hope he doesn't shatter her world too much. Look forward to the next
Cassandra
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Thank you, Cassandra for your kind review. I appreciate your friendship.
Comment from anabelle
This is really good. I especially love the way you tied it in with Leya and Steven. I didn't know this was the same Joe. Should I have?
Lovely read. I hope you are well?
Regards, anabelle
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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This is really good. I especially love the way you tied it in with Leya and Steven. I didn't know this was the same Joe. Should I have?
Lovely read. I hope you are well?
Regards, anabelle
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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It's not necessary. Joe works for the same Task Force, it won't become important until later. It's the same Matt, also. Thank you for the kind review.
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Ah! You are really smart. Pretty cool to tie them all in. :-)
Comment from RazberryBullet
Good to see friends again and know what's happening in their lives -- "This is Steven Albright, our team chief, and his wife, Leya. She's pregnant with twins and due in about a month." :)
repetition: He /scooted/ away. "What else would you like to know about me?" Sara tilted her head. "You know what my typical days are like. I get up, /scoot/ Cassie
I liked Joe's restraint. It's the only way for Sara.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Good to see friends again and know what's happening in their lives -- "This is Steven Albright, our team chief, and his wife, Leya. She's pregnant with twins and due in about a month." :)
repetition: He /scooted/ away. "What else would you like to know about me?" Sara tilted her head. "You know what my typical days are like. I get up, /scoot/ Cassie
I liked Joe's restraint. It's the only way for Sara.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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I will take care of those scooteds. Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from lola29
I've missed reading your story, and I'm happy to see that their relationship has advanced. I think Joe is very good for Sara--he seems to bring out the hidden joy in her life.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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I've missed reading your story, and I'm happy to see that their relationship has advanced. I think Joe is very good for Sara--he seems to bring out the hidden joy in her life.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Rafaqat Bano
hi
chapet 11 is good ......also interesting ...... love story with natural feelings .... deep love passions ....and way to express it .....are beautiful.subject is powerful in this chapter....."wondered how long it would take her to trust him enough to love him." a beautiful line ...it is ...excellet work...and it is well done.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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hi
chapet 11 is good ......also interesting ...... love story with natural feelings .... deep love passions ....and way to express it .....are beautiful.subject is powerful in this chapter....."wondered how long it would take her to trust him enough to love him." a beautiful line ...it is ...excellet work...and it is well done.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from dportwood
barbara.wilkey,
Although I didn't focus entirely on spotting errors, I didn't see any. You penned a great love story in this chapter.
Duane
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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barbara.wilkey,
Although I didn't focus entirely on spotting errors, I didn't see any. You penned a great love story in this chapter.
Duane
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from eliz100
This was a great read from beginning to end. Although, the love story plot is not new you make interesting with the depth of your characters.
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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This was a great read from beginning to end. Although, the love story plot is not new you make interesting with the depth of your characters.
Comment Written 10-Aug-2010
reply by the author on 10-Aug-2010
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There will be interesting twists, I think, coming up that will make this story it's own. Thank you for your kind review.
