Spawn of the Devil
A bad break up, Self Destruction.16 total reviews
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Whew! This fiery, evocative poem is a lyric but packs the punch of a narrative. The artwork gives the perfect touch.
I like rhymed couplets; yours are good.
"inflected"? Do you mean "inflicted"?
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Whew! This fiery, evocative poem is a lyric but packs the punch of a narrative. The artwork gives the perfect touch.
I like rhymed couplets; yours are good.
"inflected"? Do you mean "inflicted"?
Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Woops, I edited it ten times and didn't catch that! Thanks Janice and thanks for the review. Honeycomb
Comment from Linda England Bonam
I really enjoyed this one! You hit the nail on the head when you wrote this, and there will be a lot of reviews from women who feel the same exact way as your awesome poem told it!
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I really enjoyed this one! You hit the nail on the head when you wrote this, and there will be a lot of reviews from women who feel the same exact way as your awesome poem told it!
Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I am finding that out! It is a dangerous game with all the SID's out there, Thanks for the review. Honeycomb
Comment from samandlancelot
Honeycomb,
I like this. It's like the old saying "what goes around comes around."
Your ending is perfect: he'll understand the scar you bear as he ends up bearing it in the end.
Wounds you inflected (inflicted) with lie after lie!
Go to your girlfriend, your over night (overnight) lover
Patricia
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Honeycomb,
I like this. It's like the old saying "what goes around comes around."
Your ending is perfect: he'll understand the scar you bear as he ends up bearing it in the end.
Wounds you inflected (inflicted) with lie after lie!
Go to your girlfriend, your over night (overnight) lover
Patricia
Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Gee, Thanks Patricia, I was already told about the inflicted spelling . I guess I was in too big of a hurry to get it posted. LOL I will edit. Thanks again! Honeycomb
Comment from TammyGail
Indeed I had one like that he was a looker to, sweet as pie and I loved him so very much but he loved the ladies far to much and I will not be disrespected such ways, plus in this world now days my god just think of the vile filth they can pass to the spouse with their philandering deeds. Excellent work on this poem Honeycomb, perfect imagery used alongside your verse. Thanks fir sharing
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reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Indeed I had one like that he was a looker to, sweet as pie and I loved him so very much but he loved the ladies far to much and I will not be disrespected such ways, plus in this world now days my god just think of the vile filth they can pass to the spouse with their philandering deeds. Excellent work on this poem Honeycomb, perfect imagery used alongside your verse. Thanks fir sharing
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Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Thank you Tammy. I hope it sends a message to both sexes out there that this is self destructive behavior. The world was a much better place when I was young. Up to the day parnography entered the picture and women entered the workplace with men. . It was downhill from there.Honeycomb
Comment from randomzed
Wow!
That was worth waiting for.
The venom, the spittle, the intensity of the hate ....it all comes through loud & clear and very well expressed.
What I love to see are lines without 'bumps' so the reader can concentrate on the message, without distraction.
You win royally.
All you missed was a nod to 'I will survive'.
Actually, this poem has more oommph that that song.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Wow!
That was worth waiting for.
The venom, the spittle, the intensity of the hate ....it all comes through loud & clear and very well expressed.
What I love to see are lines without 'bumps' so the reader can concentrate on the message, without distraction.
You win royally.
All you missed was a nod to 'I will survive'.
Actually, this poem has more oommph that that song.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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I fixed it! I don't know how that happened . Sorry, I'm surprised you even tried to read it! Thank you
Comment from Modee
Wow...this is powerful. You have probably figured out by now that you can't read the words with black on black, but I highlighted the words to read them and they turned out purple on my screen, and very eeeerie. Made the poetry stand out. This is very cool, and the picture is wonderful. nice. :)
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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Wow...this is powerful. You have probably figured out by now that you can't read the words with black on black, but I highlighted the words to read them and they turned out purple on my screen, and very eeeerie. Made the poetry stand out. This is very cool, and the picture is wonderful. nice. :)
Comment Written 09-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2012
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It's supposed to be white on black. Thank you and thank you for the heads up!
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I went back and edited it. That cost me with the other reviewer. Makes me sick. Thank you for the six!!!!